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DHs/SOs...Question...

MilMommaMilMomma
in 1st Trimester

So he's known pretty much since the day I found out and he seems really really happy/excited. But he seems extremely reluctant to hear or learn anything about it. I know I've read that sometimes it takes longer for pregnancy to really "click" with them and become real but at the same time he seems bored or somewhat annoyed when I bring it up. Last week, I thought it would be a helpful gesture and got a book for him from the Dad's perspective of the pregnancy, fatherhood, etc., but he won't even pick it up except to move it out of his way.

I guess my question is basically has anyone else had this kind of...connection...issue with their SO's? Do you have any advice for me on this? I'm trying really really hard to be patient with him and I'm trying really hard not to kind of feel this personally. I just...he says he's happy and excited but he acts...closed off about the whole thing..

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Re: DHs/SOs...Question...

  • mommygrams0730mommygrams0730 member
    hubby's been to my first 2-3 appts, felt the baby kick since about 20 weeks, and clearly can see my belly...but i still don't think it's "hit" him yet. i don't think it will until the baby comes out. i think some men are just like that. he'll listen to me talk about birth and the baby and stuff like that but that's about it. doesn't really matter to me, but that's just me.


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  • HeavenisaplaceHeavenisaplace member
    He is probably overwhelmed. Also he doesn't really get to experience anything so it would be harder to get into. I don't think it has hit DH yet!
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  • MilMommaMilMomma
    Sad I'd guess as much...it'll probably be a while before it actually hits him I guess? He's probably not going to be able to go to my appointments with me either so I'm sure that's not going to help matters.
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  • lisastrolisastro member
    Tell him how you feel. Maybe a good long talk about it will make each of you never stand what the other one is feeling. It can't hurt.
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  • lisastrolisastro member
    Understand, not never stand. Oy.
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  • kg_08kg_08 member
    My DH was actually like that in the beginning when I was pregnant with DD. I got kinda annoyed because it never seemed like he really wanted to talk about the baby, and that's ALL I wanted to talk about. I found out later that he was being a little more distant because he was afraid to get too attatched in case something bad happened. After the 1st tri he got a lot more involved :)
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  • Ramirezfam11Ramirezfam11 member

    imagekg_08:
    I found out later that he was being a little more distant because he was afraid to get too attatched in case something bad happened. After the 1st tri he got a lot more involved

    I feel the same way, getting attach & then something happen would also hurt him, maybe when the baby starts to get bigger & move to where you can feel the baby will get him to start to get involve with you & the baby. Dont give up give him some time. WinkLeft HugRight Hug

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