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2nd Trimester
gender was accidentally revealed
So, I have not posted here before, but I just HAVE to tell someone about this!
My husband and I agreed not to find out the gender of our baby. We had the ultrasound yesterday and told her we did not want to know, so she did not tell us, and even told us when not to look. We were so excited to be surprised when the baby was born. Then today, when I went in for a prenatal appointment, as the nurse was taking my blood pressure she said "So, are you excited you're having a boy?" I was like,"um, well, actually I had no idea....we weren't going to find out" Awkward silence. Then she apologized and said that it shouldn't have been on the chart at all if we weren't finding out so she didn't know...I was just kind of stunned so I was like, um, okay...So NOW...I know. I am not too happy with this nurse, although I guess it's not entirely her fault. I feel like she ruined a moment for me. At least if I was going to find out, I would have wanted my husband to be there, and to find out on purpose. 
I am actually really upset that I found out this way. But now the question is, do I tell my husband? I know he still wants to be surprised, but I'm afraid I might accidentally let it slip. What would you do??
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Re: gender was accidentally revealed
That really sucks
I wouldn't be happy either. But unless you have a will of steel, I suggest you just tell DH. I know for me it would be incredibly hard to keep it a secret for the second half, as you're more likely to gravitate towards boy names, boy clothes, etc. Plus, if you and DH know together, then maybe that could ease some of your disappointment and you and DH could do special things in preparation for LOs arrival to make it exciting, now that you do know. If you keep it to yourself you may just harbor the resentment and disappointment that you found out the way you did.
Either way, congrats on your baby boy!
That really sucks, I'm sorry!
I think you should tell him what happened, and leave it up to him as far as whether or not he wants to know.
And, I would definitely tell your husband that you know. Then, you can let him decide if he still wants to be surprised. I can only imagine the disappointment though that you don't get that special surprise together. That's what I would do if it were me. I think my husband would be upset if I didn't let him know that I knew especially if I let it slip.
Oh man happened to me with my last pregnancy (number 3) I was at the ultrasound and was about 24 weeks or so, it was just a recheck on some concerns....so we had already gone to the 'big' ultrasound and held off finding out. Anyways, the tech said (oh! HE's got hicups!') I was so bummed. I pretended I didn't know and told my husband a few months after he was born. Sorry that happened:(
This
that sucks! its not that nurses fault, she had no idea.. Im assuming to tech who did your ultrasound should have been more careful when she made the chart with the gender on it
if he still wants to be suprised I would keep it to yourself... if you havent told him about the mistake just dont, because then if you accidentally slip he wont know
so sorry
That's horrible! I can't believe they put that in your chart. We were team green with our first pregnancy and it was specifically put in our chart that we didn't know and the sex was never even put in the ultrasound reports so my OB office had no idea what we were having (and we had a ton of ultrasounds because we had to see a peri).
However, now that you know I would tell your husband you know. He can decide if he wants you to tell him, but I think he'll figure it out either way. It will be very difficult to not look more at boy stuff if you are trying to keep it a secret from him. I definitely don't think you want to keep it a secret that you know because he may be very upset if he finds out you knew and didn't tell him.
IVF #1 - BFP (6dt)
Unassisted Pregnancy #2 - lost at 15w6d due to T21, severe heart defects, and fetal hydrops
That sounds like a good idea! I'm sorry your surprise was ruined, but you can still turn it around and make it fun for everyone else.
June/July 2011 - IVF #1 - Transfer cancelled due to OHSS
23 perfect embryos. All 23 made it to freezing!
September/October - FET #1 - October 12th - 2 Grade A embies
October 20th - BFP??! EDD - July 1, 2012
Beta #1 = 154, Beta #2 = 352 Beta #3 = 3,800
U/S #2 - November 14th = 133 bpm! U/S #3 & 4 - November 30th and December 7th = 163 bpm! U/S#5 - January 30th - TEAM PINK!!!
Baby Sweets born on her due date!
I don't think you should tell him, I know my husband would hate me for it. I know its difficult to keep it a secret but don't ruin it for him. By telling you're giving that nurse too much power. I don't know your husband but my husband would be soo mad if I spoiled it for him. I always have to remind Dr's and nurses, team green don't want to know or don't talk about my weight in front of my husband, etc.
This is literally my worst nightmare! I've had 5 or 6 actual nightmares about it and no one told us at our a/s, but today is my first appointment since then and I'm terrified!
I would try not to tell DH. I've been go crazy about not finding out I would just keep it to myself and let him enjoy the surprise. Plus even if I accidentally find out I don't want everyone else to know.
This is just what I would do...I'd tell DH what happened & then tell him you are completely willing to keep the secret if he still wants to be surprised. There's no point in ruining it for both of you, but then he has the option of knowing and he knows you know as well. This time around for us, I want to know but DH doesn't. So I am not going to tell him. He asked me not to and I can respect that. I'm not telling anyone (except the ladies here of course!). I'm just packing a gender neutral outfit for the baby when we go to the hosp. to keep up w/ the secret for his sake. Maybe your DH would like something like that. Sorry she ruined the surprise for you!
BFP#1 10 wk missed mc
BFP#2 DS born at 40+2 on 8/14/12 BFP#3 DD Born at 39+3 on 5/13/14
Well, even if you know the sex there are still so many surprises on the day he's born. You'll get to see his little face and know what he looks like.... so you'll still have many surprises... don't fret. But I'm sorry the surprise was spoiled.
Whichever way you should make the best of it and find a neat way to tell DH. Maybe the two of you can keep it a secret from everyone else and let it be a surprise to the rest of the family...
5 DIUI - BFN
IVF#1 - BFP - AJ 7/12
FET#1 - BFP Due 7/24/14
I'm so sorry this happened! It's one of my biggest fears. I'd be ok with finding out in a special way but i don't want it slipped on accident. I made our ultrasound tech put in huge bold letters on a post-it on each page saying that we are not finding out and do not put the gender in the file.
I'd tell DH what happened and give him the choice. Maybe you can surprise him in a special way. Maybe if it's fun and special for one of you, it'll bring some excitement to you too.
ditto this; he should know that you know, but let him have the choice of choosing to know or not
Another vote for this option. Sorry this happened this way, but try to make the best out of it and be excited for your baby BOY! They are so much fun!
We love you baby - m/c - 09/10/2011
this is a big fear of mine! I am going to specifically ask that the gender not be included on the chart and this confirms that.
I would ask DH if he wants to know. It will be hard to know and not tell him but if he doesn't want to know you can enjoy seeing him try to figure it out. Maybe you should see if you can get another u/s to "confirm" that what she said was even right. tell them that you didn't see it and you cannot believe it and since it was their goof they should permit it. and then DH can be there.
I am SO sorry. I don't want to find out either and would be SO upset in your case.
As for DH, yes, tell him you know. It'll be harder for you to keep the secret that you know than for you to keep the gender a secret if DH wishes for you to do so. I would guess that if you know, he'll want to know.
As for the nurse, I would discuss, calmly, the incident with the office manager or head physician. Not because they can do anything for you at this point, but because they should have a system in place that prevents gender revealed from taking place in the future. They should go back and investigate how this happened and the staff who didn't follow procedure (if that is indeed what happened) can then be retrained.