Special Needs
A rambling post, SPD, ASD?
I know no one can diagnose over the internet. But I'll just list my DS's personality here.
My DS is almost 3yo. He has great eye contact, his teacher says he plays with the other kids in his class great, no temper tantrums (no longer then a minute or two probably a couple of times a week), no speech delay (although sometimes i think his cadence is choppy like it's hard for him to get the words out), no pronunciation issues (can use his R's and L's, doesn't drop syllables off the end of words), no sleep issues, no issues with clothing/tags/seams, he can recall some events that happened during his day (like how he did yoga at school that day and when i ask what do they do in yoga he will show me all the poses they did), he was average on all milestones.
However, he has a history of eating issues. No problems with purees or table food at first, but as he got older, he slowly has become extremely picky. He never eats what they serve at daycare. He will feed himself dinner and breakfast only with great cajoling (please take a bite and then we will watch some TV etc). He doesn't like to get his hands dirty when it will get him out of doing something he doesn't want to do (like eat) but if he's finger painting or using shaving cream, sand/mud, or playing in the water, it doesn't bother him. But he has always hated getting his clothes wet (unless it's a swimsuit) and will beg to change his shirt/pants if he gets just ONE drop of water on himself. If i tell him "no you're fine" that is usually the end of it but sometimes it will escalate into a tantrum. He seems to pretend play just fine. He often has his stuffed animals talk to each other, calls himself Super Dude and fights monsters, pretends to feed his dolls etc. He has always responded to his name. He is afraid of almost every disney movie to the point of violently shaking if I mention putting one on. He is not afraid of loud noises at all but is terrified of mechanical things that move (like his tickle me elmo or other robotic toys that move).
We begged for someone to assess him. Our pedi sent us to an OT who met with him three times and said there was nothing wrong with him except for maybe some mild oral defensiveness and some sensory seeking (purposefully falling down) behavior she wasn't too concerned about. She gave us a system to follow and discharged us, and it was working until recently. We also got an assessment from EI when he was 2 that said he was average in all areas of development.
This past week he has started (what I suspect) is stimming. He runs in a circle, walks on his toes, flaps his arms, makes a weird hissing noise when he is playing. Sometimes I think he is only doing it to get a reaction out of me....he will give me a sly smile and then start hissing (his teachers tell him not to do this at school so I haven been reinforcing it at home). He is on the hyperactive side. Gets easily excited and can't sit still for circle time at gymboree. He seems unsure of himself and is very afraid of getting hurt while playing on playground equipment. It is easy to get him to stop the stims. I ask him to take a deep breath and calm down and he usually does. he seems slow on understanding how to put clothes on. he can brush his teeth but he can't figure out how to get his shoes on. He gets frustrated almost instantaneously if he can't do something and starts crying. He is not PT yet (although we haven't made an effort to do so yet at all). he has no "routine" issues (doesn't tantrum if we don't do the same thing everyday in order).
Obviously I am worried that we are missing something in a dx here. DH says he is fine. I guess i don't know what I am looking for in a response here, just a vent.
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Re: A rambling post, SPD, ASD?
MJS-
At his two year EI assessment we filled out an M-CHAT. No concerns. We also filled out lengthy assessment forms for things he could and could not do. He was fine in every area of development except for eating.
I took it again just to see and I got this:
Result: Low RiskThe M-CHAT is a screening tool to detect risk for autism spectrum disorders. The results of this M-CHAT screening suggest no current cause for concern about autism. Please note that the M-CHAT does not screen for all developmental delays.
It's the last sentence I am concerned about. I think the M CHAT is non-specific to diagnosing other problems (like stand alone SPD you know? or even ADHD?)
I'm a mom of a boy with SPD and ASD. The assessments that you've had done sound very promising to me, FWIW. Most of his behavior sounds like my neurotypical DD at that age. I'm not AT ALL trying to be dismissive of your concerns (been there, and it sucks), but these types of behaviors and stims sometimes mean nothing. If they are causing him to have problems in other areas of functioning (like not making eye contact with you, not developing language, etc) then I *think* that's when professionals tend to become concerned.
All that said, I understand how difficult feeding issues can be. My son also has some oral defensiveness that we're trying to worth through. How is his height/weight for his age? DS goes to a feeding clinic with OT, ST, and child psychologists on staff to address his issues. Maybe there is something like this near you that you could look into more if your DS's nutritional needs are not being met. I hope this helps.
He's 53% for weight, 80% for height. But that is only because we use bribery to keep him at the table to eat. I seriously think if he had it his way he would never eat.
Back when he was 2 (before we saw the OT) we let him do whatever he wanted and he had dropped from 75% in weight at his one year appointment to 30% for weight at his 2 year appointment. We worked really hard to get him back up to 53%....but if we let him have complete control of how much he ate again I am fairly certain he might fall off the charts. At this point we are using the TV as a reward to keep him at the table to finish his dinner.
I am going to ask his pedi about sending us to OT again at his three year appointment. But they always look at me like I am crazy since his weight is fine.