Being a mom is very lonely

gisa886 · February 2012

I've been talking about this with some friends and I realized how glad I am to have people to get through that early, lonliest stage with me. When I had Hazel I had no one to talk to and even lost a few "friends." I suspect there will be a lot of late night, sleepless silliness to look forward to on our board.

KFCupcake · February 2012

Guess I better start stockpiling my gifs!

dixee.deluxe · February 2012

I've never been more lonely than I was when I had a newb. It wasn't anyone's fault, but really, no one can understand.

Well, having a surprise 2u2 pregnancy is pretty lonely too.

gisa886 · February 2012

Dixee I feel you on the 2u2 front. Everyone I know had something to say about it and most of the time it wasn't anything positive. It really hurt and made me feel alone.

jesbeth · February 2012

It's already happened to me since becoming pregnant. Sad

I wasn't expecting it from certain people at all.

MaryYVR · February 2012

I definitely found it can be lonely... especially as DS was born in November and we have long and harsh winters here. At least with a spring baby, it's easier to get out for walks, sit at a park etc. I think it will make a big difference.

JillyOlsen · February 2012

I came to thebump tonight hoping for a thread like this one. For some reason tonight hit me hard how my social life has vanished, how unsupportive some people can be, how little effort my friends seem to put into our relationship while I feel I give as much as possible, and how lonely even pregnancy, nevermind actually having the baby, has been and will be. In my darker moments I admit to even thinking I've made a mistake; that maybe I wasn't as ready for this as I thought. I'm sure the fact that I can't seem to sleep more than 2 hours at a time isn't helping either. I'm mentally and physically exhausted and just feeling a little sorry for myself. But I take heart in knowing other people here are going through similar emotions and I am sure tomorrow will feel better than tonight. Sorry to vent but thanks for such an apt post at just the right time

funkymonkeyohyeahhh · February 2012

The only people I know IRL pregnant or with newborns are people I've met online actually. I came to The Bump and then YouTube as a video blogger when we had our losses and were TTCing. It can be a lonely journey. No one IRL that I knew was even at the point of wanting children so I was struggling to connect with people who "got me". I've met some really awesome people and actually spend more time talking to "online friends" than "real life friends" now. Thankfully there are a couple that live close by me.

JJbird86 · February 2012

Definately a well timed post...I feel how lonely I am now and can only imagine how alienated I will feel when the baby is actually born. I know that my friends didn't mean to completely abandon me when I found out I was preggs...but that's what it feels like. We were all one big group, and now it's gotten to be them and me...and I've only seen some of them 1 time since finding out I was KU. Worse than that is wishing that *someone* would give me some emotional/physical space but they continually suffocate me, even after saying they "understand" that I need space right now.

And I'm not at all bummed that 7 days after my due date ALL of my friends are going on a cruise that I was supposed to go on too....and that I had already paid a non refundable $100 deposit for.

PinkSapphires · February 2012

This board has been so helpful with answering questions, but also being able to connect with other women going through the same thing that many IRL people don't understand. It's been therapeutic in many ways. I'm glad it's someplace we can look to for support and fun! (Can I just say how p!ssed I was that the Oscars postponed my Once Upon a Time!) {{hugs}}

daniela64 · February 2012

jesbeth:
It's already happened to me since becoming pregnant. I wasn't expecting it from certain people at all.

I feel like this too! I understand all my friends aren't at the same stages of life and may not understand, but I can be supportive to them why can't they be supportive to me ?

jamaicam · February 2012

My core group of friends who live in my city are definitely are not at the same stage of life as me which I do find hard work at times (I'm the only one who is married, no one has children and most are still single) as it means I don't have people who I can talk about husband/baby things with and will understand.

I have had to do 2 things: I make a huge effort with my exisiting group to ensure that I stay a part of it - so I often have them round to my house for drinks or dinner even if I can't drink! and I also am trying to make an effort with new people who I meet who have babies/are pregnant. It's hard work and I do miss being part of my group in the way I used to be, but I know it is all worth it.

gisa886 · February 2012

PinkSapphires:
This board has been so helpful with answering questions, but also being able to connect with other women going through the same thing that many IRL people don't understand. It's been therapeutic in many ways. I'm glad it's someplace we can look to for support and fun! (Can I just say how p!ssed I was that the Oscars postponed my Once Upon a Time!) {{hugs}}

Me too! I hate awards season when my good tv gets messed up

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