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How do you handle extracurricular activities?

tsmomma42tsmomma42
in Blended Families

I'm curious what everyone does for extracurricular activities. My DS is still a toddler so it hasn't been much of an issue. Unfortunately, it isn't addressed in our court order. He just started a sports class through his daycare that has a decent monthly fee associated with it.

BD makes 3-4x what I do. He pays a very minimal amount of child support but contributes a significant portion to his daycare bill (partially because he opted for the most expensive daycare in town - almost twice as expensive as most other centers). We split out of pocket medical bills 75% him, 25% me. Are extracurriculars supposed to be paid for with child support? Are they traditionally split 50/50? Split according to income like medical bills are?

I should add that neither of us would enroll him in something without the others approval and we have a relatively decent relationship. We would also only choose moderately priced activities and at least for the foreseeable future only 1 class at a time so it's not it will be a ton of money. I'm just wondering about this and what the future might hold.

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Re: How do you handle extracurricular activities?

  • Ginlyn0Ginlyn0 member
    In our situations, whomever enrolls the kid in said activity is the one who pays. Meaning BM pays all 3 of my SK's sport fees because she enrolls them. We pay all of my DD's band fees, instrument  costs, ect. Her BD doesn't pay for anything because he doesn't enroll her. We pay for all of DD & SD's girl scout fees, camp  fees, trip fees ect. because we enrolled them. Our CO(s) do not specify.
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  • acardona1010acardona1010 member
    We split sports 50/50 but we wouldn't do it without consulting BM first.  We usually cover it and she pays us back.  We also split other things like school pictures and yearbooks.  
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  • lona.hunn@gmail.comlona.hunn@gmail.com
    With DS1, his father lives the next town over. When spring came around they always signed him up and paid for soccer so he'd play in their town. I buy shoes and shin guards.
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  • alyson686alyson686 member
    We split everything based on the same ratio/percentages, in our case we pay two thirds and BM pays one third.
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  • Holly_1007Holly_1007 member
    BM has physical custody and we just have visitation, BM currently pays for extracurricular activities.  she hasn't asked for any money.
                           
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  • TheBuddhaTheBuddha member

    SS8 lives with us full-time and we pay for all extracurricular activities.  Unfortunately BM does not approve of any of them, so DH signs SS up against her wishes. 

    SS begged to play baseball and BM said no.  DH decided that his kid should get to play baseball if he wanted to.  He paid for it all and SS just misses games/practices when he is visiting BM.  Luckily the coach understand the situation and all is well.

    But in our situation BM doesn't pay for anything, including paying no CS. 

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  • rachi1285rachi1285

    Because most of the activities we'd choose would sometimes fall on our days and sometimes BM's, we have to check with her about everything. And we've made it clear to her that we'd expect her to pay half. Currently we're working with her to find activities for both kids. Even though she makes a lot more than DH did when he was single, she constantly complains about money so our options are limited to say the least!

    As much as possible though, we try to have our own accounts when it comes to money. We pay for insurance for the kids, but we split all other medical bills 50/50 with BM. Last fall we got a $300 bill (in my name) for SD's dentist visit. BM said she couldn't pay and wanted me to set up a payment plan. But since I don't want my name linked to late payment of bills, I paid the whole thing. BM kept coming up with reasons why she couldn't pay. I actually ended up letting it go as a Christmas gift to her (yes, it killed me!) because I didn't want to deal with her excuses anymore. Now as we look for preschools and extended day care for the kids, I'm making sure we're able to keep our account separate from hers!

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