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September 2012 Moms
Telling Long Distance and Vent
Due to an unforeseen issue with the UK Border Agency, there is a very high probably that our trip to the US to publicly announce this week (we were going to be leaving on Wednesday) will not occur. After a long weekend of tears and anger, we are still looking at our options, but it is not good.
I have dreamed about being able to tell people I am pregnant in person. We did tell our parents we were pregnant over Christmas, but I am so upset. My grandma is in hospice and I purchased a sweatshirt that says I am a very Special Great Grandma because she won't live long enough to meet her first great grandchild to tell her.
How did you or would you tell people long distance? I didn't want to write an email to everyone, I wanted to tell them in person. I feel that everything this past year as been against us. It took us nearly a year to get pregnant and we had started testing and when we finally do get pregnant, I am forbidden by the UK Border Agency to leave the country or we will lose our visa status, jobs, etc. WHF? Life is so unfair and I don't want to have to make this decision. I want to tell everyone as planned.
Also, how long would you wait to tell? I am 12 weeks today, hopefully we can figure out some type of plan this week. I am now thinking that I might be willing to wait until the end of March.
What would you do in our situation. I am just so upset. Vibes for our passports and paperwork to be approved are needed and would be greatly appreciated.
This discussion has been closed.
Re: Telling Long Distance and Vent
I'm so very sorry Coffee, I can empathize. It's so hard to be away from family during this special time in our lives. I really hope this gets straighten out soon for you. I hope by some miracle it can occur.
As far as answering your question, I haven't told anyone outside of my mom, MIL and SIL. I will be 13 weeks Monday. I liked telling people through Skype. Other than those people that I have already told I don't feel the need to tell anyone else in person. Everyone else will learn through FB in a few weeks. The first time I was pregnant I told my mom and MIL through Skype too.
In the event you don't get home before your Grandma passes, I'm sure your family would be just as pleased to get the information via Skype or through the phone. I'm sure it would lift everyone's spirits.
Sending you major paperwork Vibes!!!
We used Skype to tell everyone far away.
Sorry to hear you're having problems with the Border Agency. They aren't the best people in the world.
Thanks, I know you guys know how hard this can be. I am just upset that my grandma is doing so poorly and that we can't live the country when it doesn't say that is any of their paperwork. I am on hold with United now trying to cancel our flights.
I am a planner and I know I get super upset when things don't go as planned. We planned to go back and tell everyone and I am having problems getting over the fact that our plans will not work out as intended.
First, sending approval vibes for your paperwork...
If it doesn't work out for you to go home, maybe mail the sweatshirt to your mom and have her bring it and a laptop with Skype to your grandma. To me (and this is just my opinion), sharing the news with her before she passed away would be more important to me than sharing it in person. And who knows, hope can do miracles. My DH's grandma was given 3 months or less to live (breast cancer) when we got engaged. We told her that do to a lot of different circumstances, we needed to set the date for 6 months from then. She hung on, had a lovely day at our wedding, and passed away 2 weeks later. While I'm sure the situations are different, I just want to encourage you to be creative and find a way to let your grandma know. (I'm sorry that you are in the difficult position where time is this important.)
Sorry you're having so much trouble! Best of luck resolving your issue. While we don't live in another country we're pretty far from our families and just told over the phone. It was still a sweet "reveal" and we got great reactions.
I don't know the circumstances at all of anything about Visa's .... but can you not approach the US embassy and see if they can give you some assistance?
Chase Matthew born at 35 weeks on July 31st
Sadly no, I spoke to the embassy and both countries have an agreement to not get involved in each other's visa affairs.
Sorry about your situation, I hope it gets worked out soon.
We still haven't told anyone, but are planning to tell all family via Skype next weekend.
Whatever way you do it, they will be happy! Its a baby and they will be excited! I asked my mom if she was sad that she couldn't hug me in person or be there physically. She told me it was just fine and that the news whatever way it came was so wonderful. She said could wait to hug me when we did come to visit and that it would be that much sweeter to see me then