Poll: Do you support 'gay marriage'?

bluestreet · February 2012

And if not, do you worry that a century from now you will be lumped together with bigots who opposed interracial marriage?

This time, non-clicky!!!

mlf625 · February 2012

Yes, I support gay marriage. And yes, I think our kids will one day look back and think it was despicable that gays were once told they couldn't marry.

L L CG · February 2012

Niiiiiiiice. I also like the inflammatory way you posed the question. Leading, assuming, judgmental. Good second effort, woman!

Yes, I support gay marriage.

SarahPLiz · February 2012

I think civil institutions should be made available to all consenting adults, including homosexuals and polygamists.

The church can deny whoever they want from having a religious ceremony attached to their legal marriage, but that doesn't mean a couple shouldn't have a legal marriage with all the legal rights and responsibilties of that marriage.

kirknsarah · February 2012

Yep, 100%. A citizen is a citizen, and everyone should have equal laws. I don't think churches should be required to marry anyone, gay or straight, but in the eyes of the government there shouldn't be any difference.

Although I'll be honest--it makes me crazy that my church has so much doctrine that is non-inclusive.

ETA: I agree with MLF--I think that future generations will look at this issue and be shocked at the way this debate has gone down.

joyco · February 2012

I do. And I am married to a man who, while he has gay friends and has no problems with them in general, does not support gay marriage. I blame that on several factors. None of which I will share here.

august8080 · February 2012

Do you include civil union in your meaning of gay marriage?

bluestreet · February 2012

august8080:
Do you include civil union in your meaning of gay marriage?

No. Definitely not. I'm talking "marriage" with all the same semantic, legal, linguistic elements associated with heterosexual marriage. There would be zero difference. I'm not talking churches, purely governmental.

ruthyk · February 2012

mlf625:
Yes, I support gay marriage. And yes, I think our kids will one day look back and think it was despicable that gays were once told they couldn't marry.

Yep!

libbyann · February 2012

bluestreet:
And if not, do you worry that a century from now you will be lumped together with bigots who opposed interracial marriage?

Nice way to word it. Tongue Tied

(and so I'm not flamed or called out or whatever you have it, since this post seems to be meant to be inflammatory, yes, I do support gay marriage)

bluestreet · February 2012

L L CG:
Niiiiiiiice. I also like the inflammatory way you posed the question. Leading, assuming, judgmental. Good second effort, woman!
Yes, I support gay marriage.

Thank you, but I doubt any dissenter will bite for fear of a pile-on.

OrangeFelt · February 2012

SarahPLiz:
The church can deny whoever they want from having a religious ceremony attached to their legal marriage, but that doesn't mean a couple shouldn't have a legal marriage with all the legal rights and responsibilties of that marriage.

I support it, and agree with this part about the church. I think they should be able to do it legally.

angelaggie · February 2012

SarahPLiz:
I think civil institutions should be made available to all consenting adults, including homosexuals and polygamists.
The church can deny whoever they want from having a religious ceremony attached to their legal marriage, but that doesn't mean a couple shouldn't have a legal marriage with all the legal rights and responsibilties of that marriage.

This. I think the gov't needs to stay the heck out of it. Who are we to judge who doesn't love who?

MrsMillerTime · February 2012

bluestreet:
L L CG:
Niiiiiiiice. I also like the inflammatory way you posed the question. Leading, assuming, judgmental. Good second effort, woman!
Yes, I support gay marriage.

Thank you, but I doubt any dissenter will bite for fear of a pile-on.

Then why ask the question?

GuavaGal · February 2012

SarahPLiz:

I think civil institutions should be made available to all consenting adults, including homosexuals and polygamists.

The church can deny whoever they want from having a religious ceremony attached to their legal marriage, but that doesn't mean a couple shouldn't have a legal marriage with all the legal rights and responsibilties of that marriage.

Here! Although I have to say that I am wary of polygamists, since many of the participants in those types of unions are non-consensual.

I am a fan of the seperation of church and state.

ali-1411 · February 2012

mlf625:
Yes, I support gay marriage. And yes, I think our kids will one day look back and think it was despicable that gays were once told they couldn't marry.

I don't think they would be shocked by it. Are any of us ::shocked:: by the way blacks were treated back in MLK days? What about the Irish back in the Industrial Revolution? There's always someone to persecute and discriminate against. Once the gays are accepted, it will be someone else. I think the only shocking thing is people who don't get that.

I'm not saying its right or that we shouldn't keep aspiring to be better. But its definitely not shocking.

ETA: Crap, sorry mlf, I quoted the wrong one. Someone used the word Shocked, I swear. But I'm supposed to be working, not bumping. Excuse me

bluestreet · February 2012

MrsMillerTime:
bluestreet:
L L CG:
Niiiiiiiice. I also like the inflammatory way you posed the question. Leading, assuming, judgmental. Good second effort, woman!
Yes, I support gay marriage.

Thank you, but I doubt any dissenter will bite for fear of a pile-on.
Then why ask the question?

Because maybe someone will bite who has an interesting point of view, or maybe other interesting exchanges will transpire, obviously.

agran · February 2012

joyco:
I do. And I am married to a man who, while he has gay friends and has no problems with them in general, does not support gay marriage. I blame that on several factors. None of which I will share here.

I am in a similar situation-- I wholeheartedly support it. My DH in his catholic school blindness thinks civil unions should be allowed but it should not be called marriage. I point out to him we were not married in a church so we are not married either... to which he sheepishly agrees. He thinks we should all have civil unions. WTF dh... come out from under the nun's habit!

MrsMillerTime · February 2012

bluestreet:
MrsMillerTime:
bluestreet:
L L CG:
Niiiiiiiice. I also like the inflammatory way you posed the question. Leading, assuming, judgmental. Good second effort, woman!
Yes, I support gay marriage.

Thank you, but I doubt any dissenter will bite for fear of a pile-on.
Then why ask the question?
Because maybe someone will bite who has an interesting point of view, or maybe other interesting exchanges will transpire, obviously.

I guess I just don't agree with the pointed wording of the question - it doesn't really do anything to draw out a legit discussion. At this point all you've managed to do is scare anyone that might be opposed to gay marriage from answering and you're left with an entire thread of people quoting each other (sorry, Tayee!) saying "ditto this!"

bobcatsteph · February 2012

mlf625:
Yes, I support gay marriage. And yes, I think our kids will one day look back and think it was despicable that gays were once told they couldn't marry.

This.

bluestreet · February 2012

MMT- It was my intention to be provocative, not to start an alliance between supporters and opponents of marriage equality. I feel no need to pander to or patronize the opposing point of view. Like many, I do equate opposing marriage equality to opposing interracial marriage, and my wording in my opening post was an invitation/challenge to someone to tell me how the two views differ in any important way. I later recognized that everyone who was chiming in agreed with me, and that might scare a dissenter off. Or perhaps we've just got an awesomely progressive board on this issue.

MrsMillerTime · February 2012

bluestreet:
MMT- It was my intention to be provocative, not to start an alliance between supporters and opponents of marriage equality. I feel no need to pander to or patronize the opposing point of view. Like many, I do equate opposing marriage equality to opposing interracial marriage, and my wording in my opening post was an invitation/challenge to someone to tell me how the two views differ in any important way. I later recognized that everyone who was chiming in agreed with me, and that might scare a dissenter off. Or perhaps we've just got an awesomely progressive board on this issue.

I get that you were trying to make a point and your question is honestly a pretty good rebuttal, but I guess I just don't agree with slapping the opposition across the face right out of the gate without even giving them a chance to speak. You basically shut down any chance of a decent debate before it even began.

That being said, I do know that there are some politically conservative people in this bunch but I think that when it comes to hot-button social issues (abortion, gay rights, etc.) that we're a pretty progressive bunch. The most heated discussions I ever recall taking place on this board usually revolve around breastfeeding, circumcision, and the occasional bikini.

MrsAJL · February 2012

I'm sure there are a number of people on this board, both active and lurkers, who don't support gay marriage.

However, she makes a good point that the history will paint a very different picture of opponents to gay marriage. Currently, we can look at opponents of interracial marriage as bigots, racists, uneducated, backwards, super religious, etc. We'll probably look at opponents of gay marriage in the same light.

To answer Blue's question, yes I support gay marriage. I support the legal union of two people being referred to as marriage. I support a religious organization's right to not perform religious marriage ceremonies for gay couples. I'm lucky to belong to a religious movement that allows clergy to decide whether to conduct same sex marriage ceremonies. There is no universal prohibition or allowance of same sex religious marriage ceremonies in Reform Judaism. And yes, I do believe that this particular way of thinking and practice is superior to other religions that outright oppose same sex marriage. ***puts on flame retardant suit***

abh1977 · February 2012

Based on off-board discussions, it seems like most conservatives on this board stay away from participating in these types of posts. Especially when the original post offends them right off the bat.....regulars have left over less controversial issues when it gets ugly.

MrsAJL · February 2012

MrsMillerTime:
That being said, I do know that there are some politically conservative people in this bunch but I think that when it comes to hot-button social issues (abortion, gay rights, etc.) that we're a pretty progressive bunch. The most heated discussions I ever recall taking place on this board usually revolve around breastfeeding, circumcision, and the occasional bikini.

Maybe, but since we seem to keep political talk to a minimum around here, it's hard to know. A lot of us see each other IRL on a regular basis. I think a lot of us on here don't like potential IRL backlash.

atlantic · February 2012

I do... but I wonder what the results will look like if you did make it clicky...and anonymous.

MrsMillerTime · February 2012

MrsAJL:
MrsMillerTime:
That being said, I do know that there are some politically conservative people in this bunch but I think that when it comes to hot-button social issues (abortion, gay rights, etc.) that we're a pretty progressive bunch. The most heated discussions I ever recall taking place on this board usually revolve around breastfeeding, circumcision, and the occasional bikini.
Maybe, but since we seem to keep political talk to a minimum around here, it's hard to know. A lot of us see each other IRL on a regular basis. I think a lot of us on here don't like potential IRL backlash.

This is also VERY true and I totally agree. I'm probably just making the assumption that we're a progressive group since it is the vocal majority on the board. Either that or we're talking too loud. Wink

Tiffany5412 · February 2012

Yep. I'm totally not the type of person to EVER put a bumper sticker on my car and DH either - he's a total car freak. But we both proudly sport our equality stickers in the corner of the back window.

Tiffany5412 · February 2012

Tiffany5412:
Yep. I'm totally not the type of person to EVER put a bumper sticker on my car and DH either - he's a total car freak. But we both proudly sport our equality stickers in the corner of the back window.

Those are available for free on HRC's website BTW.

Noisemaker · February 2012

Yes, I support gay marriage.

And I sincerely hope that we get to a point where history looks at today's bias against gays and finds it as despicable as racism. But I'll admit that I'm not confident we will.

AustinBride06 · February 2012

I'm a big fan of separation of church and state.

If marriage is a legal institution, it should be available to all, with everything that comes with it... benefits, divorce, taxes, property, custody, whatever.

As a religious institution, any religion has the right to recognize or not recognize the marriage.

On the same token... I believe that religious charities have the right to spend their money or not spend it how they want according to their core beliefs (insert birth control issue here). The government should not be able to limit or require things against their beliefs. I admit, it does get rather fuzzy when you see the amount of taxpayer money that goes to these charities/institutions.

And, women (and everyone else) must have the right to ask for and receive appropriate health care. I'm a fan of universal health care for this very reason. In the meantime, clinics and places like Planned Parenthood are very good at filling those gaps.

So yeah... when I say separation of church and state, I think it goes both ways.

drpayne · February 2012

agran:
joyco:
I do. And I am married to a man who, while he has gay friends and has no problems with them in general, does not support gay marriage. I blame that on several factors. None of which I will share here.

I am in a similar situation-- I wholeheartedly support it. My DH in his catholic school blindness thinks civil unions should be allowed but it should not be called marriage. I point out to him we were not married in a church so we are not married either... to which he sheepishly agrees. He thinks we should all have civil unions. WTF dh... come out from under the nun's habit!

"catholic school blindness" was the most offensive thing I've read in the whole thread. I'm not a supporter of gay marriage but I think marriage and civil unions are very different. What it comes down to is that it's not my place to judge anyone. I may not agree with it (and offer my opinion when someone asks) but I'd never be hateful or unkind. That doesn't make me a bigot.

L L CG · February 2012

drpayne:
agran:
joyco:
I do. And I am married to a man who, while he has gay friends and has no problems with them in general, does not support gay marriage. I blame that on several factors. None of which I will share here.

I am in a similar situation-- I wholeheartedly support it. My DH in his catholic school blindness thinks civil unions should be allowed but it should not be called marriage. I point out to him we were not married in a church so we are not married either... to which he sheepishly agrees. He thinks we should all have civil unions. WTF dh... come out from under the nun's habit!
"catholic school blindness" was the most offensive thing I've read in the whole thread. I'm not a supporter of gay marriage but I think marriage and civil unions are very different. What it comes down to is that it's not my place to judge anyone. I may not agree with it (and offer my opinion when someone asks) but I'd never be hateful or unkind. That doesn't make me a bigot.

What do you think is the difference between marriage and civil unions? I don't think the movement is asking the Catholic church, or anyone for that matter, to recognize that they are married in God's or a higher power's eyes. They are just looking for the rights afforded to people when they enter into a legal institution called marriage. Civil unions don't come close to providing those same rights and protections. If you'd like some examples, quick google search returned this site: https://www.now.org/issues/marriage/marriage_unions.html

Civil unions are analogous to segregated schools, IMO. Seperate but equal being the idea, but in practice it's just another way to ensure that gays are treated as lessor citizens.

HSartteach · February 2012

drpayne:
"catholic school blindness" was the most offensive thing I've read in the whole thread. I'm not a supporter of gay marriage but I think marriage and civil unions are very different. What it comes down to is that it's not my place to judge anyone. I may not agree with it (and offer my opinion when someone asks) but I'd never be hateful or unkind. That doesn't make me a bigot.

I agree with LL...what is the difference to you?

MrsAJL · February 2012

drpayne:
"catholic school blindness" was the most offensive thing I've read in the whole thread. I'm not a supporter of gay marriage but I think marriage and civil unions are very different. What it comes down to is that it's not my place to judge anyone. I may not agree with it (and offer my opinion when someone asks) but I'd never be hateful or unkind. That doesn't make me a bigot.

We've all been married in a civil union. Every one of us on this board who is legally married. We obtain a state marriage license. That license is signed by witnesses and a person authorized to confer the marriage. That's all it takes to be legally married.

We call it marriage because that's the common language that we use. Civil unions and marriage are the exact same thing. Exact.

A religious marriage ceremony that is performed by a specific religion is not being threatened. Catholicism, Southern Baptist Convention, Judaism, Hinduism, Islam, any other organized religion that has it's own culture and practice of marriage ceremonies can do as it pleases with regard to marrying same sex couples. I don't think the government should force those institutions to change how they do things.

I think those institutions should change because they are wrong in denying acceptance of same sex couples in to their congregations. I think the Catholic church is wrong for shunning homosexuals. I think Christianity is backwards in its vilifying homosexuality. I think it's time to change or become obsolete.

The Bible has been used to justify many things that we now consider wrong and impossible to accept. It's time to move past this part too and see that love, acceptance, and equal treatment under the law for all people is true justice.

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