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Edited- update
I dd'd because there was so much personal info in there.
DH came home tipsy from a happy hour with a client. I pounced, told him I couldn't take it anymore and that I needed to move DD ASAP, so matter the cost.
He said he understood and that it's my decision.
(((SQUEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!)))
Thanks for all of your help ladies!
This discussion has been closed.
Re: Edited- update
Well, my dear, you know what I think. But I hope some other daycare moms will be able to give you more informed and insightful opinions.
Smooches.
(read it. you know you want to.)
anderson . september 2008
vivian . february 2010
mabel . august 2012
Ugh! I don't know what to tell you because you're really stuck between a rock and a hard place.
I would feel the way you do about wanting to pull A out of that center, but also not having a viable option.
That being said, these are things that I just don't think I could tolerate. Is there a SAHM friend your trust who might be able to temporarily nanny A until you get her in to the new program?
I don't know where you've already looked and if you're looking for a place near your office or near home. I have time to research places, so if you want someone to make phone calls and ask the hard questions, I'd be happy to help.
This is so tough, L. I don't know what else to tell you. {{{hugs}}}
I am so sorry that you are in this situation. I stay at home now but my son was in daycare for 2.5 years so hopefully I can try to help.
We were always with in home daycares and loved them. However the first provider, whom we really loved and adored, decided to change her policies and hire an assistant/have more kids under her care. She had loved my son for the first year and a half. She wore him in a sling, fed him, loved him and was a wonderful provider to him. However, the moment that I became uncomfortable with the situation, I pulled my child. It was gut wrenching because I felt like she was SO awesome with him but in my heart, I knew that I was uncomfortable with the situation.
You always have to look at it from the future. If something was to happen, what would the ramifications from that be and would you be able to live with it? It seems like a tough question but it's true. These people are caring for and raising your child. I never expected to agree 100% with my sons providers(everybody has their own parenting opinions, etc...) but I always needed to trust them and the environment.
I understand the money situation but I feel like this is a situation where you get what you pay for. There is a reason why they are cheap---they have high teacher turnover, uneducated staff, can't seem to feed your daughter lunch, etc... Daycare is a very high turnover field to begin with but if a center pays their teachers well, educates them on child safety, provides a stable and good work environment with an opportunity for growth, etc... then teachers are more inclined to stay and be happy in their jobs.
If it were me and this way my child, I would do whatever I had to do to find another center. If that means paying double then so be it. If double isn't an option then I would try other types of places like an in-home daycare. She is your daughter and I know it's hard but you just have to follow your mommy instinct!
Have you checked with the state to see what/if any other claims have been filed against them? I would probably do that if you haven't already.
Good luck!
What would be the perfect option for you if space and $$ were not a factor? Would you prefer a center or a nanny share?
I know of a few in-home centers in Circle c with openings.
My neighbor is expecting next month and is looking for a nanny share starting in June. If this is something you might be interested in email me kristikata a t a n I c k at gmail.
I have no advice, just hugs. Finding childcare is extremely difficult and stressful.
I would be inclined to pull her out and find alternate arrangements if you are concerned about her safety.
I obviously have no advice but wanted to point out you've posted about your dislike of the day care situation a couple of times-- think that's mommy gut instinct telling you something. Did you ever look in to the college student just for the summer? Worst case scenario there is an end in sight and I imagine LLCG like white on rice is pretty darn scary.
Good luck... and remember Alice is happy and healthy because you worry so much about this stuff. She's a lucky girl.
Married October 28, 2006, TTC since March 2009 IUI #1-8 w/ clomid = BFN
IVF # 1 May, 2011 = BFP!!! Stillbirth at 26 weeks (placental failure/severe IUGR)
FET #1 February, 2012-- BFP! Beta #1=84 Beta #2= 207 Beta #3= 3,526
Our Rainbow Baby is on the Way!
Ha! Thanks! I'm flattered.
1) No I don't think that's excessive, although that's the higher end of what I would be ok with
2) That would make me very upset, is there any way you can pop over there every day during lunch?
You also said you were thinking of hiring one of her teachers, if so it sounds like you trust her at least. Can you find out her schedule and see if you A can be somewhere else on her days off? I also think you get what you pay for and that you'd be happier with the more expensive places for the short term.
Good luck
I agree that you need to listen to your instincts and get her out of there as soon as it's a viable option. The kinds of things you're worried about are real cause for concern. I mean you're not talking about a daycare that doesn't read enough books or play with her enough--you're worried about her physical health and safety.
Your plan to be on them is a good one for the short term, but will be draining for you, too. So for your sake and hers, I hope you're able to find another solution before September! I think some of the other Southies use in-home care that they like, so maybe they can chime in and offer some alternatives.
Also, we send our older DD to one of the neighborhood schools that you referenced above. And while it's true that we pay through the nose, I have to admit, I love it. Having been in a previous situation that we didn't like at all, it is worth the extra money to me for the piece of mind. That doesn't help with the waitlist problem, but I thought I'd offer my 2 cents on that anyway.
Good luck! I know how awful it is to have your kid in a bad daycare situation. My fingers will be crossed that you find a better solution quickly!
Have you thought about going with something (anything) else until you can find a more suitable long-term care situation?
My DD is in the same day care as yours, but a younger class. It was great while I was nursing, but after losing that benefit, DH and I started looking elsewhere for similar reasons. We hadn't planned to move her until 18 months, but about a month ago, a couple of factors came to a head (some day care related, some not), and we're pulling her. She'll start at a new day care Monday. Unfortunately, the new place costs 2x the current place, but we wanted her out...now. We decided to eat the extra cost until she can start her preschool-like day care at 18 months.
**the nestie formerly known as karen2508**
i don't have anything new to add but i know how hard it is to send your kid to daycare and i'm sure it's so much harder when you don't love and don't fully trust the place you're sending them.
i hope you find a solution that works for you soon!
I'm so glad your DH is relenting on this.
Nice technique!!
Hope you find something you totally love really soon.
Ditto! Having to leave your baby in daycare is hard enough without adding all that you've had to deal with at this place. Don't discount all in-home centers. We had a good in-home care experience before we got a spot at our current center. There are some good people out there. Best of luck!