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March 2012 Moms
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another vent about maternity leave "policy"

ChristinaBargholzChristinaBargholz member
in March 2012 Moms

I just got informed by another co-worker there will not be a board meeting tomorrow to clarify our "parental leave policy" (<-link to OP). My director has been avoiding me all day. The next board meeting isn't scheduled until after my due date. We won't know how much time we are allowed to take off until AFTER our babies are here. I'm just saying f*ck it at this point. I'm so annoyed!!!

And responding to a few people from the OP: 

kiarstin: I show "extra initiative" on a daily basis. It is expected of you while you take time off to be available at the drop of a hat. I have offered to do half days or work from home but nothing will be decided upon until I'm needed... then I'll just be expected to come in. I work in the Human Services field... "extra imitative" is aka getting taken advantage of. Sorry if I sound snarky but all I have ever done is shown extra initiative... and this is how I get treated?!

Zilly13: douchcanoe is indeed what she is. 

vanillacou...: You're right. My director should have thought a little more about preparing for 2 out of it's 7 employees being gone at the same time. Not my problem though. What is my problem is how she is now trying to bend the rules to fit what is convenient for her. 

BOTB2011: This is the kicker... the other women pregnant right now was pregnant a few years ago and it was never brought up once about how she was taking more than 6 weeks off or couldn't because of our "policy". Our policy was never even brought up. Our "policies" haven't been changed in almost ten years... so they're the same. This is just more proof that my director just wants us to be here to do her work so she can keep coming in at 11 and leaving at 3!!!

Working, Breastfeeding, Unmedicated Birthing Mother of Two.
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Re: another vent about maternity leave &amp;quot;policy&amp;quot;

  • JURAHJURAH member
    Ugh, definitely sounds shady. Sorry it's come to this.
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  • bookers1bookers1
    this is just a really crummy situation for you to have to deal with. It's supposed to be an exciting time and your boss is really taking away from the experience. I hope you get something worked out:(
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  • LillyGrrlLillyGrrl member

    Christina, you said the board is meeting- do you guys get the chance to address them at all?  I would think that if the other girl was pregnant before and the policy was the 6 weeks or whatever after she used up her vacay time when she was pregnant before that they can't go and change that now.  Does the board know that?

    Also, don't you think it's about time they realized what a lazy a$$ your boss is? 

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  • BOTB2011BOTB2011 member

    WOW!! That really stinks and is extra stress that you really don't need right now. It's amazing that they have waited this long to try to iron it out... Not like they haven't had months to plan right?

    Have you documented your concern/questions in writing to your boss or have they just been verbal discussions? Since they moved the meeting until after you're out, now is the time to document your current understanding of the policy. That way while you are off they won't be surprised that you will be off for XX weeks, available X times a week to check in, etc. It also gives your boss/HR the opportunity to respond and possibly clarify BEFORE you go out. (Hopefully what I'm trying to say makes sense....basically put yourself in the drivers seat and try to be proactive a well as open as possible to discussions with your boss on clarifying the policy or agreeing to how it will be administered until the board meeting)

    I am assuming that the other woman who is pregnant right now is as upset as you are about this? You might ask for her help in documenting how her prior pregnancy leave was handled; and if you do decide to send an email/letter to your boss she could help with details.

    TTC since November 2010
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  • ChristinaBargholzChristinaBargholz member
    imageLoolaide:
    imageChristinaBargholz:

    BOTB2011: This is the kicker... the other women pregnant right now was pregnant a few years ago and it was never brought up once about how she was taking more than 6 weeks off or couldn't because of our "policy". Our policy was never even brought up. Our "policies" haven't been changed in almost ten years... so they're the same. This is just more proof that my director just wants us to be here to do her work so she can keep coming in at 11 and leaving at 3!!!

    This sounds like discrimination of some sort to me.  If they're going to allow one person to take that time off, they have to allow everyone in the same situation to do so.  That might be something to bring up to your boss. 

    My other co-worker who was pregnant before and is now pregnant again with me got told she got "lucky" with the first pregnancy.  Angry

    Working, Breastfeeding, Unmedicated Birthing Mother of Two.
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  • ChristinaBargholzChristinaBargholz member
    imageLillyGrrl:

    Christina, you said the board is meeting- do you guys get the chance to address them at all?  I would think that if the other girl was pregnant before and the policy was the 6 weeks or whatever after she used up her vacay time when she was pregnant before that they can't go and change that now.  Does the board know that?

    Also, don't you think it's about time they realized what a lazy a$$ your boss is? 

    We aren't "allowed" to be present during any board meeting unless we are invited. The board has no clue what is going on and will only hear her side of it. That's why I feel pretty hopeless about it all. A few members have realized that she is a lazy a$$. Like when they've stopped in to talk to her or called her and she isn't here they kind of get it but she just says she is so swamped with work she has to work from home... even though she'll be gone for two days and come back with the same stuff she was "working on".

    Working, Breastfeeding, Unmedicated Birthing Mother of Two.
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  • ChristinaBargholzChristinaBargholz member

    imageLGLDVM:
    Ugh what a load of crap. I am so sorry that you are getting the run-around. I think they are trying to force you back sooner because they are a small company and they can't afford to have you both out at the same time. I'd be tempted to take the 6 weeks parental leave, come back for 2 or 3 days and then get 'sick' for another week or two, using my PTO for that time. 

    My other co-worker has enough sick leave to do this...

    Unfortunately I have only been here a year and the month I get after my anniversary date will be gone.  

    Working, Breastfeeding, Unmedicated Birthing Mother of Two.
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  • ChristinaBargholzChristinaBargholz member
    imageBOTB2011:

    WOW!! That really stinks and is extra stress that you really don't need right now. It's amazing that they have waited this long to try to iron it out... Not like they haven't had months to plan right?

    Have you documented your concern/questions in writing to your boss or have they just been verbal discussions? Since they moved the meeting until after you're out, now is the time to document your current understanding of the policy. That way while you are off they won't be surprised that you will be off for XX weeks, available X times a week to check in, etc. It also gives your boss/HR the opportunity to respond and possibly clarify BEFORE you go out. (Hopefully what I'm trying to say makes sense....basically put yourself in the drivers seat and try to be proactive a well as open as possible to discussions with your boss on clarifying the policy or agreeing to how it will be administered until the board meeting)

    I am assuming that the other woman who is pregnant right now is as upset as you are about this? You might ask for her help in documenting how her prior pregnancy leave was handled; and if you do decide to send an email/letter to your boss she could help with details.

    My director is boss and HR. And we aren't allowed to really make contact with our board. My director has said that they will clarify the policy. Which to me I think should be them looking at it, realizing what it says, allowing us to take the amount of time we've requested off, then re-writing the policy so this doesn't happen again.

    What will actually happen is my director will say we need to rewrite this policy now to only allow 6 weeks and then that's all that we'll get. I feel so defeated!

     

    Working, Breastfeeding, Unmedicated Birthing Mother of Two.
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