- Pregnancy
- Baby & Toddler
- Parents
- Getting Pregnant
- Baby Names
- Product Reviews
-
Registry
- Community
-
More
Want a personalized experience?
Download the free app
Special Needs
malcivar
member
Not sure if today was a FAIL or not
malcivar
member
We spent the day with my SIL and her kids today. I'm not quite sure if today was a "fail" for DS or not.
I should preface this with that my SIL's kids are a handful to say the least. One is a 3+ year old who is about as difficult as they make them. The other is an 8 year old who spends half his time competing for attention with the 3 year old and the other half in a constant state of excitement.
We walk in and from the start the 8 year old decides that he's just going to hop around making crazy sounds in order to "entertain" DS. And oh boy is DS entertained - he's cracking up non stop. Laugh laugh laugh laugh. DH is getting a little uneasy so he starts telling the 8 year old to stop "entertaining" him and just play with him or talk to him - falls on deaf ears so DS is just getting more wired and more wired and more wired. So pretty soon DS is just as hyper as the 8 year old - he's making this odd grunting sound (DS doesn't really talk to communicate yet) and will not calm down no matter what DH is doing.
The 3 year old meanwhile wants no part of DS so he's acting up. DS mostly ignores him but I think that's more because the 8 year old just has ALL his attention.
As everyone starts trying to calm down the 8 year old, we start trying to calm DS down and eventually he's back in his own play pattern but he's still SUPER excited.
I dunno if it was me just overwhelmed with three screaming children for several hours or what but everything just felt so strange today - I wasn't sure if it was the other kids who were a bit too much of if this was just DS being DS and I hadn't really seen it in a social setting yet ... or my own hangups at the craziness that is my in-laws' home.
I dunno. As the day draws to a close I can't help but wonder just what happened today - fail or not? *sigh*
This discussion has been closed.
Re: Not sure if today was a FAIL or not
Thanks auntie - it helped to get your input.
I have my own "suspicions" about both these boys but it's not my place to really say anything because I think it would just sound like I'm trying to find something "wrong" with other kids because of DS's issues but the older boy has definitely had some moments. Apparently his parents have been called more than once to school on account of his inability to do what he's told and/or stay still. Actually sounds like DH as a child (he has ADD). The younger child is described by his parents as "the most contrary boy in the universe". I think he's difficult but I remember his older brother being the exact same way at that age. The answer is "no" no matter what the question is. And he "needs" everything.
You're right - DS had a blast the entire day. See that's the thing with him - we're constantly being asked how he deals with new situations, places, etc, because it's like they're expecting us to say that he hates it or that he has a hard time with it, but he doesn't. We have yet to have an experience where we try to take him somewhere new (other than the dr's office) and he wants no part of it.
Oh and I should clarify, telling my nephew (the super excited one) to calm down or settle down is par for the course no matter where we are. His mom complains that she always gives him "the talk" about how to behave depending on where they're going and it's in one ear and out the other so I'm pretty sure he was given some sort of pre-talk before DS got there because at one point I did hear his mother say "what did we talk about?" but like you said, he saw that what he was doing was making DS laugh and he wasn't about to stop.
To answer your other question - I don't know what I expected honestly. Maybe I'm just not used to 'play dates' and 'chaos' might be the norm. I was just thrown a little.
There was one "funny" moment where DS was playing with his Leaptop and the younger boy decided that he "needed" it. I wasn't sure if I should say something when he proceeded to shove DS out of the way to play with it but I figured his parents were right there and not doing anything about it. DS went to go play with it and the other little boy just yelled at him not to touch it and to go away. DS proceeded to SIT ON HIM and continued to play with his toy. The other kid lost it - totally freaked out - I think he's used to bullying other tots around and did not expect to be sat on. It's a tactic I've seen DS use before on him - last time he just touched his face and his cousin lost it. It's like he remembered how to "deal" with him. Obviously all parents involved tried to let both boys know that they could share the toy but you could tell everyone was trying really hard not to laugh at the situation.
When I mentioned a similar incident to his therapist she said she would've been more concerned if he just walked away from his toy but that he took some sort of action to 'defend' his ownership of the toy was a good thing - we just needed to make sure that it didn't turn aggressive.
Thanks again auntie for your advice.