I have been MIA, sorry, but I had my boy :)

ashleyann82 · February 2012

This thing is a novel. Lots of details, but I wanted to get it all out while it was really fresh in my mind and the emotion were still there. Enjoy!

He was born 2/12/12 at 1:49pm, 6lbs, 7oz, 19 in long

So Saturday I had a fundraising Gala for the Humane Society to go to. I've been designing all there materials for the events and they wanted me to go, so Ben and I and my work people went, it was like 6-10pm and everything was great they raised a lot of money and we had some fun!

Well we went home, Ben had a couple beers and we just hung out and watched some TV. I had a terrible headache though and that was odd for me, I was really just feeling off. Well we went to bed around 11:30- midnight. I could not get comfortable, kept tossing and turning, I finally told Ben I was going to go and try to sleep on the couch, he offered to join me on the other couch but I told him to stay in bed. So, I went out and sat on my birthing ball, it was the only comfortable seat. My head was still bothering me and I eventually laid on the couch. That wasn't working either so I just decided to go lay in bed and force myself to sleep. I was really tired. I went and laid down on my left side. That sucked, so I tried flipping to my right side, and I had the painful feeling like I over stretched my groin muscle and I just thought, wow, strange. Sure enough about 2 min later I felt a huge warm gush. I instantly knew, I half rolled, grabbed Ben's arm and yelled, I think my water just broke. I then ran into the shower and I start gushing like crazy! Like insane, could not believe how much, just like in the movies. Ben is freaking because he just fell asleep and he's out of it. He started running around collecting things and I started to panic. I was standing there trembling uncontrollably, holding on for dear life to my towel rack. It must of been the adrenalin or something, my teeth were shaking, Ben kept checking on me as he ran around and kept asking me if I was cold. I could not stop the shakes, I'll never forget that feeling of just panic mixed with oh my god we are having a baby right now. I couldn't get it together. Meanwhile Ben was grabbing the car seat and instruction book out of the box and throwing it in the back seat, we had planned to install that the next day. I just wanted to get put together and on our way to the hospital, because we had to drive 30 min to Saginaw, where my hospital is located. I kept trying to get my water to stop but I wasnt having any luck, it was terrible. So i finally just said ** it, threw a towel between my legs and ran out the door!!!

We got to the hospital and got hooked up to monitors, I was contracting but couldn't feel them, so they suggested we start walking the halls. So we got going. We were excited beyond belief!! We kept walking past the nursery and scoping out the babies having hearing screens and such. We just couldn't believe we were going to meet Harvey soon!! I started feeling the contractions after about an hour and a half of walking. I was 1cm and 90% effaced when checked and contracting every 5-7 min. I started to bounce on the birthing ball, had Ben rub my back, breathed through them for the most part. After a couple more hours, I started to tremble and shake really terribly and my contractions were getting a lot more painful, so I got in the Shower and the hot water really helped me get through them, I was having some tough back labor, so the Shower was great. My L&D nurse was thinking I was in transition die to the trembling and making great progress so far. I had been at it all morning though and by the 7:30 am shift change I asked to be checked again. I hadnt took anything for pain and wanted to make sure I wasn't getting too ahead of myself. I was thinking about how far I wanted to make it without meds. Well, I got checked and to everyone's surprise, I was 100% effaced but only dilated to a 2!!!! That was a huge let down. I was really hurting at that point and didnt really know how much farther I could make it. They started discussing pitocin because with my water breaking, we were working against the clock to get him out in 24 hours. So at that point it was 8am, I agreed to the pitocin but I wanted an epideral. I had been going all night with no meds, no sleep, I was completely drained of energy.

Unfortunately, it was a busy evening and it took over an hour to actually get me the epideral. I had to get 2 bags of fluid through my IV first and I was at my breaking point at 8am, so I started to cry during contractions. I just hurt so badly and I kept begging for them to stop. Ben felt pretty helpless. He just did not want to see me like that. He kept pacing the halls waiting for the anesthesiologist! She finally got in and started to get my back cleaned off and ready to inject, my contractions were getting closer at that point and I was scared she was going to go to poke the needle in and I'd jerk and paralyze myself or something. I kept making her stop what she was doing. We finally got it in and it was like almost instant relief for me. They started the pitocin a half hour after that and I stopped feeling contractions so I slept for like an hour.

But then, they came in all rushed, doctors, nurses, everybody, as I was waking up and started flipping me to my left side and freaking out at the monitor, 5 people rushed in and started flipping me and throwing an oxygen mask on me and I was panicking because they weren't telling me anything. Ben was losing his *** on the nurses because we knew something was wrong. We eventually found out the pitocin was stressing him and his heart rate kept dropping. They couldnt get me in a position that was working so they went up into my uterus with an internal monitor and they started flooding me with fluid to give him a cushion in case he was putting pressure on the cord. They eventually stabilized him and stopped pitocin. I was scared out of my mind at that point. They checked me again and no progress. No progress with 4 hours of pitocin in me!! Then they started talking c section and I started freaking because of the Malignant Hyperthermia surgery risk. The doc came in and we discussed pros and cons. Basically it came down to them saying we could try pitocin again but the same thing could happen to Harvey and then they'd have an emergency on their hands and something could happen to me in the OR because they'd have less prep time. So the best option was to just call it and they'd start prepping the OR right then for me and we could get us both out safely. The kicker though was that because of the Malignant Hyperthermia, they could boost my epi, they could spinal block me but if neither of those options worked, they couldn't give me General Anesthesia. Meaning if I didn't numb, i would have to feel everything and just deal, they said they would be quick and then they would drug me with pain meds as soon as they could.

I have never in my life been so terrified. I was nauseous, I thought I was going to die. Well, they wheeled me back and boosted my epi several times and I didnt feel a thing when they pinched me, which was a total Thank God type of moment! C section went off without a hitch, I bawled my eyes out when I heard him cry, Ben did too. Neonatal looked him over since he was early but he was perfect, all 6 lbs, 7 oz and 19 inches of him!!!!

We were wheeled into recovery together where I was able to breastfeed him and watch him get a bath and just enjoy him. We finally got put into a room and I was starving, just so freaking hungry at that point. I had a fever too. So I finally got to eat and get some meds in me and show him off to my family. We kinda had a rough start breastfeeding but the recovery has been easier than I thought! I already have my staples out!! And Harvey is really the best, he sleeps pretty good for a newborn, eats good, we are a great team, Ben and I. I am overjoyed and really just beaming all the time. On a natural high!!!!

Thanks for taking the time to read my story, and my gift to you are cute snuggly pics of my boy