Crazy-making

JoySeattle · February 2012

I just got an email from the cryobank letting us know that they now have 10 mom vials of our previously sold out donor (which as many of you know are very attached to, have we stocked up on and are waiting to resume ttc with). Part of me wants to buy more, even though I feel/hope that what we have is enough to either get us pregnant or at least show we tried a lot before IVF would be a last ditch effort. I wish this uncertainty (of how many vials we'll go through) wasn't so expensive and crazy-making.

ball.and.chain · February 2012

I'm totally with you! We are just buying as we go right now since I don't want to buy a lot until I know our donor is the one who gets me pregnant. But we are pretty attached (there's still plenty of our guy to go around) and assuming he works, we really want to buy enough for a sibling. But how much is enough? I think CCB suggests 10 vials; at the beginning of the process my wife thought that was crazy but now that we are on cycle 5 (and I'll be older next time) I think she's starting to get it! My insurance covers IVF at any time (yes I know I'm insanely lucky) and I'm sure my RE would not go for it at this point (nor do I think it's time given multiples-risk etc) but the appeal for me is that we would hopefully have extra embryos to freeze for later which would take the sperm thing off the table. I hate the thought of buying 10 and needing 2. I hate the thought of buying 5 and running out. Money is a huge factor but at the same time so is using the donor I want and having full siblings. UGGGHHH.

Kershnic · February 2012

I hate this whole dance too. We are also very attached to our donor, and the idea of potentially having to switch to get pregnant a first time or for a future sibling is very upsetting to me. I've been cautiously monitoring the sperm bank's website to be assured that he's still available, and have asked a few times along the way already whether he's still active. He is, but they've implied he may not be for much longer, which drives me crazy. Plus, right now we're paying for storage at the RE and at the sperm bank, because the stuff that stays at the bank is eligible for a fairly generous return/exchange policy. So it's an endless headache of how much to ship to minimize shipping costs, and how much should we own at each place and should we stock up for a sibling before we even have a pregnancy.....

In short, I'd totally be tempted to buy more too! But oh the things I could do instead with that money.... Good luck making a decision.

Kershnic · February 2012

ball.and.chain:
My insurance covers IVF at any time (yes I know I'm insanely lucky) and I'm sure my RE would not go for it at this point (nor do I think it's time given multiples-risk etc) but the appeal for me is that we would hopefully have extra embryos to freeze for later which would take the sperm thing off the table.

Side conversation, but if you choose to only transfer one embryo with IVF (not the most common decision, but something more REs are encouraging for women with likelihood for good outcomes) the multiples risk is actually lower than medicated IUIs. And I want to come work for your employer and get some of your health insurance. :-D

JoySeattle · February 2012

Thanks for validating my feelings. Even though the urge was strong initially, I've talked myself out of buying more based on the fact that if we don't get pregnant with what we have, we'd most likely need IVF, and the money for extra vials would be better spent on that.

One of the main reasons we'd consider moving to IVF sooner would be for just the reason Kershnic mentioned: we want to avoid multiples if at all possible (twins run in my family). If we need to move to medicated cycles, we'd most likely do a couple femera/clomid cycles with close monitoring, but would most likely not do any injectible cycles because the multiples rates are generally much higher.

Also, I'm insanely jealous of fertility benefits. We don't currently have any fertility coverage, although I'm trying to convice C to make a career move to a field where she'd be more likely to have it through work. We'll see how that goes...

ball.and.chain · February 2012

Kershnic:
ball.and.chain:
My insurance covers IVF at any time (yes I know I'm insanely lucky) and I'm sure my RE would not go for it at this point (nor do I think it's time given multiples-risk etc) but the appeal for me is that we would hopefully have extra embryos to freeze for later which would take the sperm thing off the table.
Side conversation, but if you choose to only transfer one embryo with IVF (not the most common decision, but something more REs are encouraging for women with likelihood for good outcomes) the multiples risk is actually lower than medicated IUIs. And I want to come work for your employer and get some of your health insurance. :-D

Hmmm. I never thought about doing one embryo -- I guess I just thought they always transfer two (or more). Interesting...I wonder where my RE falls on this.

I'd love it if you came and worked for us! And we have a NYC office...but it's not exactly your field. I'll admit to feeling vaguely guilty about my health insurance. We knew it was covering my IUIs -- which surprised my RE -- but when we heard from the financial specialist at the RE's office that it covers everything, no limitations and predeterminations, I was really surprised (and relieved). So when I see what some of you are paying OOP, and when I hear about women saving up for OOP IVF, I wish I could share my coverage with everyone! Sadly, I can't even share it with my wife without paying a ton in taxes.

leapgirl8 · February 2012

Our donor went off the market right before the cycle when we got pregnant, and we toyed with the idea of switching for that and future cycles. But it's going to be at least a few years before we try for #3 (IF we try for #3), and we figured that anyone we switched to would also go off-market before we were ready. We have 7 or 8 vials left, which gives us a good shot but no gaurantees of getting pregnant with the same donor - especially since I have decided that I won't be using any medication. If we run out, we'll make the decision to switch donors or quit trying at that time. (Having kids with two different donors is not ideal but it's fine with me; I just have a feeling that running through that many cycles without success would wear us out and make us ready to call it.)

Two*True · February 2012

Are they IUI vials? I thought IUI could be turned into IVF vials if necessary. I know IVF can be used for IUI (at least, my RE will do it), so maybe it doesn't work the other way around.

Your logic is sound, but I'm crazy and would totally stock up. I bought out the last 10 vials our donor has (after DD was born) and we probably won't even TTC again.

JoySeattle · February 2012

We have 11 IUI and 2 ICI vials. The plan is to use the IUI vials first and keep the ICI vials for IVF if needed (any vials can be processed for use for IVF, and it's better to wash ICI vials for IUI/IVF than use ART/IVF vials for IUI/ICI).

I'm not feeling too great about the odds of getting pregnant *twice* with only 11 vials, but I'm not ready to spend another few thousand on sperm. I'm hopeful that with my recent health improvements it will be easier to get pregnant. This all makes me re-think our waiting for monitoring/meds plan...

Want a personalized experience?

Crazy-making

Re: Crazy-making

Choose Another Board

Search Boards