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January 2012 Moms
namara5532
member
Maintaining Sanity
namara5532
member
DS is having one of those nights. He just won't stay asleep very long, even when I nurse him down. To be fair though, I've been trying out some advice from the pediatrician to transition him out of my arms to sleep and into the crib. She showed us how we can safely have him sleeping in the crib by rolling up a long blanket and cocooning it around him. He's just not tolerating it, and he hasn't slept since this morning, so I'm conceding defeat and letting him sleep in my arms for a few hours.
I admit I've been getting frustrated with him. I know it really isn't his fault, but when he doesn't sleep I don't get to sleep. Nursing is the only sure-fire way to calm him right now (unless he's having awake time) which means DH can't really do much except maybe diaper duty. It's made doubly hard by the fact that he's at work at night, meaning he not only isn't here during the times when I really want to sleep but he's sleeping half the day to be able to keep performance up at work.
What do you ladies do during those moments when you're left by yourself pinned to the couch with a fussy baby? I could use some sanity saving tips before I get to the point where I'm begging DH to take more unpaid paternity leave just so I can get some sleep and be human again.
July '15 siggy challenge: Thanksgiving fails
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Re: Maintaining Sanity
I'm sorry. To be honest, being the only one who could feed my DD was one of the reasons I gave up on trying to breastfeed. I give a lot of credit to you for sticking it out. That being said, my DH is the one who is working right now so he needs his sleep, which means when DD is fussy and won't go to sleep. it's all on me.
It's okay to feel frustrated. We're not the first and we certainly won't be the last to feel that way. It doesn't make us bad moms. What helps me is knowing that at some point, I *will* get some sleep. It may not be until 8AM, but at some point this baby will fall asleep and then I can too. That helps me power through... that and DVRed episodes of 30 Rock.
Also, if having your son sleep in his crib isn't working out for you yet, then don't do it. There will be time in the future to transition him. If you're at the end of your rope trying to make something happen, just let it go and try again at some other point. It's not worth your sanity.
This...I'm in the same boat. I am not going back to work and my husband works and takes classes at the local college. So, it's really all up to me to take care of the LO. This is my full time job and although it is the hardest job it's also the most rewarding. This is my first and everybody keeps telling me that it does get better, so I'm trusting that it's true. People wouldn't have more than one kid if it wasn't. I EBF as well. So, even if my husband wanted to help there isn't a whole lot he could do at this point. We don't want to introduce the bottle for a while. LO sleeps with us pretty much every night. She may make it in her bassinet for an hour, but if she sleeps with us we usually get 4 hours in. So, I'm all for that. You will get through this. We all will
This sounds worse than the reality of it.... My youngest son was VERY fussy. He was never diagnosed with colic but I'm pretty sure he had it b/c he was EXTREMELY fussy, esp. at night. My co-worker suggested putting him in the bouncy seat, on vibrate, stacking that on top of the dryer and turning the dyer on low and then.... if you really have to..... walk away. Again, this sounds way worse than the reality if you give it a try. If walking away makes you uncomfortable, park a seat near by but somewhere out of sight. Also, as a mother of irish twins, I can def. say there's a point where the incessant crying/temper tantrums just don't shake you as much as they usually do. You won't tune them out, but I've noticed that it makes my mil and mom much more nervous. My sitter who has kept children for over 30 years gave me a good bit of insight: babies need to cry - sometimes just to vent or relieve stress. If baby is fed, burped, changed, and hasn't fallen asleep yet, he/she may just be trying to root into sleep or trying to relieve stress by crying.
And for the record, my youngest son is extremely independent and falls asleep on his own faster than any baby I've ever been around. He sleeps through the night without any problems. I really feel like his sleep behavior is because we did this so much with him when he was an infant.
Hang in there mama! We've all been there or will be soon!
I felt like this with DS. It was rough, so sorry you are going through it.
Do you have a recliner? This has been my saving grace both this time and last time with DS. It is possible to safely sleep with a newborn in your arms. Since my DH is back to work and DS takes just one nap a day, I have to do whatever works to get as much sleep at night, since naps during the day are few and far between.
I place a pillow under/supporting my arm that I hold DD with to help support her. Basically, the pillow is at a slight angle toward me so that it keeps her snuggled next to me without the risk of her falling between me and the arm of the chair. I also sleep lightly enough that I wake to any movement she makes. We end up in this sleeping arrangement by the end of the night every night at this point. DH just knows where to find me each morning to waks me up to shower before he leaves for work.
If you don't have a recliner, you could also try napping on the couch with your side flush to the back of the couch. This way, you can support your LO on your chest with your arm that is supporting him/her also supported by the back of the couch.
Obviously, I've put a lot of thought into this because I don't deal with with lack of sleep. If you can get a decent nap in, you will feel loads better!
ALL of this. You are not alone, and unfortunately I don't think there are any quick fixes (not that you're asking for one). We just have to power through and sleep when the baby sleeps.
I definitely agree with the crib part, too. DD slept in the crib the first 10 days or so, but it wasn't going great. She would wake up a lot, not sleep well, etc. We bought a RnP and it has been amazing. She goes for 5 hours at night sometimes!
I have succesfully tricked my girl into thinking I am still holding her by placing a heated pillow on her tummy. I have a flat pillow filled with flax seeds that is intended for soothing the back/neck. I put it on a plate in the microwave with a cup of water (seperate) for 3 1/2 minutes. It gets warmed to around body temp and slightly steamed. I always wait a couple minutes after the microwave stops, test the heat on myself, and keep a light blanket between baby and pillow. If I prep this in advance, I can get her to go right back to sleep after transferring her to crib or car seat (she hates the car seat!). She often wakes breifly during the transfer but usually falls right back out in the warm pillow is there.
This gets me through the day and gets baby girl into the car wihtout screaming. At night she is usually easier to transfer from my chest to her crib. Getting up to prepare the heating pad is a little too much effort except for on the fussiest nights.
I found a product online marketed for colic that is a flaxseed and herb filled belt for infants. Same idea, more expensive.