Need opinions - dating related

GardenMagee · February 2012

So I've been spending time with this guy for about three months now. But I've known him for about 10 years (we went to college together and have kept in touch through facebook). Things have been moving very slow, but he's made a real effort to see me. He lives about an hour from me and he always comes down my way to see me. I've only driven up there once. He sent me flowers on my daughters birthday and again on Valentine's Day. Everything he's said and done have given me the impression that he's interested in me. I'm deliberately taking things slow since this would be my first relationship since I left my ex, but I was starting to let my guard down since he seemed sincere. But here's the kicker... I just looked at his facebook page (effing facebook) and saw a post from someone saying, "Thank you for the flowers! You're the best ex boyfriend ever! " Ummm... it really took me off guard.

So, I guess my question is, what would you do/think?? My gut reaction was to cancel our plans for Saturday and just kind of blow him off after that. But I wonder if I should say something? Ugg, I'm really disappointed I let myself start to like him. I'm also upset with myself that I was considering letting him into our life.

DHYGchica3 · February 2012

That is weird. I really don't know what to say. Were you guys exclusive or just casual. If just casual I would just continue to keep things that way.

GardenMagee · February 2012

Definitely casual. He just gave me the impression that his intentions were exclusively directed at me.

ljandrews22 · February 2012

He could be a sucker for love...don't cancel your plans though! Go out and have fun, enjoy your friendship first.

FB/Twitter will forever be the fall of a budding/growing relationship.

PrincessFiona9 · February 2012

If you never had any type of talk about exclusivity or anything like that then you can't really be too mad. I would just ask him what his intentions are and tell him you don't necessarily want to jump into a relationship but you also want to be exclusive and let things develop as they may. That's what I would do at least.

BeachBum1223 · February 2012

Hmmm, that is a tough one. Since this was just a casual thing, I wouldn't cancel plans with him & I wouldn't let my guard down quite yet. Keep it casual for a while longer & give him time. Maybe in a couple more months you will have a better idea of his intentions (without having to flat out ask). I hate confrontations like that and if it hasn't been very long it may look like you are rushing him. Give it time.

I may have missed this but how long have you been talking recently?

ETA: Ok, I see its only been 3 months. I say give it 3 more months before you say anything to him about being "exclusive".

Did he respond on FB to the post from the girl he sent flowers to?

GardenMagee · February 2012

Thanks everyone for helping me put things into perspective. He did respond to the other girl, he said, "I try.

" So I guess I'll just see how I feel. I definitely don't want to rush things, but it left me feeling a little weird thinking he's playing the field.

achase123 · February 2012

Sounds very odd. I would ask him what is going on and what his intentions are. I'm assuming you two aren't exclusive? If you are that's really bad. If you aren't, I still think it's a huge red flag that someone you're spending time with sent flowers to his ex. Who does that?

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