Total 1st world problem... but still a problem (too many nannies now!)

Useonfire · February 2012

Ok so many of you are familiar with my never ending nanny drama. DH and I went from having no nanny prospects to having 2 competent qualified ones who want a long term position, who we're currently testing out on a part time basis who we like A LOT. Can you guys help me troubleshoot or point out anything I'm missing?

The first one started last week and has been great with DS. She is early 30's, Thai, her English is pretty good, she's very smart (she's most of the way through an MBA) and she's very intuitive when it comes to DS, which I like (knowing exactly how to dress him to go outdoors, figuring out when he's hungry etc). I know she has lots of experience with newborns (she was an Au Pair with 2 different families and a live in nanny). Her rates are $600/wk (about $15/hr) and she will do housework relating to the kids if she works full time (while the kids are napping etc.)

I remembered why I liked the 2nd one as soon as she walked through the door today, and Liam immediately took to her. She's very respectful, loves to take care of things around the house and she is making DS laugh a lot. She is early 30's, from Peru, speaks English fluently, but can happily speak Spanish to DS (which would be fine considering we're likely sending him to a Spanish immersion pre-school in the fall). She charges $500/wk flat rate (which works out to be about $12/13/hr) and she has lots of experience (she has nannied for the same family for 6 years and has watched 3 out of 4 of them since the day they were born).

I seriously don't know how to choose. I don't have to choose right now, they both understand the part time basis until March. I won't need a full time nanny until I go back to work again in April/May. I also feel somewhat stupid for having TWO part time nannies when Thursday is my last day of work before maternity leave. But, I am 37+ weeks pregnant, so I justify it that way

VARedhead · February 2012

Not a bad problem to have, especially considering what you've been through! They both sound great, and I hate to say go with your gut, but that's what I think you should do.

The only question I would have about the first one you describe is how long will she want to be a nanny after she's finished with school?

Also, have you talked to the families they previously worked for? All else being equal as far as their ability to care for your kids, maybe ask about how much sick time they took? Or consider what kind of vacation time they want?

Good luck!

SoonToBeMrsDTS · February 2012

If they are equally qualified, I would go with the 2nd one since it'll save you $400/month. It also seems like a good long term situation if she was with her last family for 6 years. Will she do light housework while the kids are sleeping like the other one?

Useonfire · February 2012

SoonToBeMrsDTS:
If they are equally qualified, I would go with the 2nd one since it'll save you $400/month. It also seems like a good long term situation if she was with her last family for 6 years. Will she do light housework while the kids are sleeping like the other one?

Yes - in fact the 2nd one sounds more inclined to do LOTS of housework. Not that the 1st one won't, but the employer of the 2nd one raved about her abilities to keep the house in order and the kids in order.

Useonfire · February 2012

VARedhead:
Not a bad problem to have, especially considering what you've been through! They both sound great, and I hate to say go with your gut, but that's what I think you should do.

The only question I would have about the first one you describe is how long will she want to be a nanny after she's finished with school?

Also, have you talked to the families they previously worked for? All else being equal as far as their ability to care for your kids, maybe ask about how much sick time they took? Or consider what kind of vacation time they want?

Good luck!

The first one says she is looking for a 2 year commitment, which is fine for us. However, based on our previous experiences, we take that lightly and assume they can quit at any time. It's sad how jaded we are

The second one NEVER takes time off (she even told me that in the interview). She has poor work boundaries and doesn't stand up for herself. Clearly, that makes her a great employee, but as a therapist, I couldn't refrain from educating her on the importance of advocating for herself and her needs She told me that she found a doctor who worked on Sundays so she wouldn't ever leave the family in a lurch! I would never walk all over a nanny (and it doesn't exactly sound like the family did that to her, but they certainly allowed her to work ALL the time) but it's nice to know she's loyal. The past family only paid her $575/wk to care for FOUR kids 8-9 hours a day.

Hey Jellisy · February 2012

I know they both say they are OK with waiting, but I am sure they are still interviewing. I would be nervous that both would find other employment. I might not wait till the end of March to make my final decision. If all things are equal, I would also go with the less expensive nanny. There's a lot I would want to spend that extra $400/month on.

WinesNotWhines · February 2012

I would also wonder about long term prospects for the nanny who is getting her MBA. I would assume she'll want a different type of job after graduation.

NicoNiko · February 2012

Seems like #2 is the better choice based on your write-up, and on all the comments too. Good luck!

jess08200 · February 2012

I tend to agree that #2 seems like the better choice. I wonder about #1's long term commitment.

BirdGirl01 · February 2012

#2. Are they both legal to work in the U.S.? Their rates make me question that. We pay our nanny $450/week for our half of our nanny share. Granted, we've heard of other families who pay less. If one is and one isn't documented then I would go with the one who is.

Sofka · February 2012

I also think you should go with #2, sounds like being a nanny is what she loves to do while for #1, it's a job until she graduates. Will she be doing homework while the kids are asleep? Will staying up late working on a project interfere with her job performance?

Plus, #2 will keep your house clean and is cheaper!

Useonfire · February 2012

BirdGirl01:
#2. Are they both legal to work in the U.S.? Their rates make me question that. We pay our nanny $450/week for our half of our nanny share. Granted, we've heard of other families who pay less. If one is and one isn't documented then I would go with the one who is.

Wow, that is pricey! Almost everyone I've interviewed wants between $12-$15 after taxes (or a few dollars higher if we're paying by check). We agreed (to both of these nannies) that we'll pay in cash so they don't have to pay taxes, but we do. Which is fine.

The first one has a green card and work visa so she is totally legal. And the second is a US citizen I believe (she married someone whom she met here in the last several years).

Useonfire · February 2012

Sofka:
I also think you should go with #2, sounds like being a nanny is what she loves to do while for #1, it's a job until she graduates. Will she be doing homework while the kids are asleep? Will staying up late working on a project interfere with her job performance?
Plus, #2 will keep your house clean and is cheaper!

I agree. The first one is terrific with kids, but yeah, it certainly isn't her long term goal. But, at the same token, we don't need anyone real long term (that we know of). Just the next 2 years or so. Granted, that may seem like a ton of time to someone who wants to get into the corporate world...

doggylovr · February 2012

i'm a little late in the game but I agree with PP about number 2:-) so glad you found something(s) :-)

BirdGirl01 · February 2012

Useonfire:
BirdGirl01:
#2. Are they both legal to work in the U.S.? Their rates make me question that. We pay our nanny $450/week for our half of our nanny share. Granted, we've heard of other families who pay less. If one is and one isn't documented then I would go with the one who is.
Wow, that is pricey! Almost everyone I've interviewed wants between $12-$15 after taxes (or a few dollars higher if we're paying by check). We agreed (to both of these nannies) that we'll pay in cash so they don't have to pay taxes, but we do. Which is fine.
The first one has a green card and work visa so she is totally legal. And the second is a US citizen I believe (she married someone whom she met here in the last several years).

That makes sense. Our nanny probably gets $15 or $16 after taxes. But she's paying taxes (we withhold her portion, we pay our employer portion). We wouldn't work with a nanny unless everything was on the books, including on her end.

Useonfire · February 2012

BirdGirl01:
Useonfire:
BirdGirl01:
#2. Are they both legal to work in the U.S.? Their rates make me question that. We pay our nanny $450/week for our half of our nanny share. Granted, we've heard of other families who pay less. If one is and one isn't documented then I would go with the one who is.
Wow, that is pricey! Almost everyone I've interviewed wants between $12-$15 after taxes (or a few dollars higher if we're paying by check). We agreed (to both of these nannies) that we'll pay in cash so they don't have to pay taxes, but we do. Which is fine.
The first one has a green card and work visa so she is totally legal. And the second is a US citizen I believe (she married someone whom she met here in the last several years).
That makes sense. Our nanny probably gets $15 or $16 after taxes. But she's paying taxes (we withhold her portion, we pay our employer portion). We wouldn't work with a nanny unless everything was on the books, including on her end.

We've agreed to pay both of them in cash, but we will file them on our own taxes. I guess it sounds like we've adopted a don't ask don't tell policy, though not intentionally. Most of the folks we interviewed asked to be paid in cash and we figured it was kind of the norm. Clearly, we are so new to to this and missed some research!

umdbride · February 2012

I think I'd go with #2 for all the reasons PP stated. Plus, even though you think you only need her for 2 years, it might be nice to have the flexibility of having her on longer if she'd be open to after-school care, etc. It sounds like she really becomes part of the family she works for, which would be nice.

otoro98 · February 2012

#2! #2! Absolutely...Not only is she cheaper, she really sounds like the better choice, AND in addition will help your child be bilingual in a language you were already considering for him, at no extra cost. Go for it!