I'm thinking it's time.

atmidwoodtobe · February 2012

Well ladies, I know i've only been TTC for 1 cycle, but I think DH and I have made a decision to TTA for now. I was 12dpo yesterday and got a BFN. It hit me SO much harder than I thought it would. I know it's not over until AF shows, but I just have a really bad feeling about this cycle.

I'm also dealing with a lot of guilty feelings, like my subconsious is trying to replace our little girl with a new baby. I feel like it's time for me to take a step back and work on my and DH's relationship for now. I know that I'll never be 100% ready, but I think that for now we're going to just work on us and try and take things as they come. Putting this pressure on myself and DH seems to be making my anxiety/depression worse.

I love you all and I am praying that you all get your take home babies soon. I would love to stay and give support if you would still have me!

**HUGE HUGS TO ALL**

ecmleo · February 2012

I hope you are able to find some peace and strength! I will be thinking about you often! (((HUGS)))

raashton · February 2012

While it can be so hard to step back, good for you for being able to make that call. Take the time needed to heal more and to be kind to yourself.

And of course, you are still welcome here!

mijakach · February 2012

Aww, I'm so sorry hun. TTCAL is a very difficult thing. Whether it's your 1st, 5th, or 15th cycle, seeing a BFN and the arrival of AF is always crushing. I completely understand how you're feeling. If you truly feel like you are not ready to TTC again, I give you major props for being able to step back on focus on you and your DH right now. No matter what you decide, I hope you plan to stick around. ((Hugs))

QuigleyCat1 · February 2012

Awww honey I'm sorry. Take the time that you and DH need! But I hope that you will stick around. Many hugs!

4legsRbest · February 2012

Big hugs to you!!!

thatlauragirl · February 2012

I totally get where you're coming from and support and understand your decision. We were given to all clear to ttc after 2 cycles but I think I'll be waiting a little longer until I'm in a healtheir place emotionally. It definitely takes a toll on you.

On the bright side, I'm so glad you're going to stick around here!

ashpink25 · February 2012

I'm so sorry that you got a BFN. I had my FX for you too. Like PP's said, TTCAL is rough. It takes a lot out of you and your DH. I wish this whole process was easier for all of us, but its not and it sucks. If you feel like you need to take a step back and just focus on you and your DH then go for it. Take care of ourselves and hopefully you will get your BFP soon! Just know that if you decide to leave us you will be greatly missed. Huge squishy ((hugs))

mork · February 2012

Definitely do what you feel is right for you and DH right now. I wish you the best TTA session possible. And of course you're still welcome here!

jullybean · February 2012

I think recognizing your feelings and making the call to TTA takes so much strength. Take care of yourself and your DH. (Hugs!)

StephRN23 · February 2012

I wish you well during your time TTA. T&P with you, we'll be thinking of you!

lau1021 · February 2012

((big big hugs!!)) please stick around!

angielayne926 · February 2012

So sorry you're having a rough time. Losses put a lot of stress on marriages, and sometimes you just have to step back and really focus on your relationship more than a baby. DH and I have had to really work on our marriage lately and I think a big part of that is the stress I am putting on myself to get pg quickly. I hope that this break is good for you guys. We'll be here for you when you're ready to come back! ((((HUGS))))

atmidwoodtobe · February 2012

Thank you all so much for your love and support! You ladies really are the best!

I will definitely be sticking around to give lots of hugs and support to you all when you need it!

**HUGS TO ALL**

Mrs Carbo · February 2012

I'm sure it was an agonizing decision to TTA, and you are incredibly strong for making it. I hope that you find the peace that you need to help you feel better. T&P will be with you.

LEP424 · February 2012

Taking care of yourself and your relationship is the most important thing. I hope you stay around! ((Hugs))

FreyaWin2382 · February 2012

Big hugs to you. I think that you are definitely making the right decision while you sort out these feelings.....TTCAL is very difficult, and I can also say now that PgAL is very hard too (especially those feelings of guilt you describe) so I praise you for taking the time to connect with your DH and make sure you both are on the same page.

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