Natural Birth

Second time easier?

I need encouragement. I am getting nervous I cant do this.  DD was born completely naturally. I really wanted it and DH was amazing. I always said he was my epidural that day.  He really helped me. I was determined not to use any drugs.  This time around, I thought I would be really calm about labor - seeing as how I already did it once. But I am not. I am freaking out. Is the second time easier? I dont know what to think. I am just a ball of hormonal nerves.  Any encouragement or advice would be greatly appreciated. Thanks.

Re: Second time easier?

  • The second time for me was.....different. With my first, contractions built up slower and water didn't break until I was pushing. I wasn't really nervous with my first, because I figured whatever would happen would happen. I wasn't set on a natural birth that time, but it was fast enough that I didn't feel like I needed anything (8hrs). Labor and delivery was med free.

    With my second, I was WAY more nervous. Mainly because I knew it hurt the first time LOL. And because it seemed to go so fast. With my second, my water broke first, then contractions started 1/2 hr later. There was no slow build up. It was intense right away. Labor was 5hrs from start to finish. I asked for something to help take the edge off (nubain for 1hr), which I now regret. I was probably in transition. I think I was just so surprised that it was so different, and I hadn't really prepared myself with natural laboring techniques.

    This time, I am way more prepared. I want another med-free natural birth. So my advice is....expect this time to be different. It may not be, but prepare yourself with techniques just in case. It may be easier!!! I think you can do it!!! And me too :)

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  • I think it's easier in that you know how labor will feel, and you remember how to get through contractions. I was really nervous before going into labor with my second, too. But the anticipation was much worse than actual labor. And most of the time, labor starts gradually, so you have time to remember how to deal with contractions before things get crazy.

    I did start to freak out that I had forgotten how to deal with contractions during labor with my second, but it turned out it was just transition - I was pushing about an hour after I started thinking I couldn't do it!

    Good luck!!

    DS1 - Feb 2008

    DS2 - Oct 2010 (my VBAC baby!)

  • Ummm...I agree with the pp. My second time was different, but not necessarily easier. I was more nervous because i knew what I was in for, so to speak, but I also felt more calm, confident, and prepared because I knew I had done it once before and could do it again. The actual labors were different, and to be honest, my second labor was much shorter (8 hours vs 30 hours) but more painful. But like I said, knowing that I had done it naturally before and knowing that it would be so worth it in the end, made it easier to push through. Just focus on the positives and the fact that you've already done it, and you'll be fine! 
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  • I agree with pps. The second time around was different. I knew more what to expect, which is both good and bad. I was induced the second time around, so labor didnt really build the way it had with my first.

    But when I got to the pushing stage, I felt so much better. I knew that things only got better from here. I actually laughed as DS#2 came out because I knew I had done it again. I think my husband thought I had lost my mind.

    Just remember, you've done this once before, and you can do it again. Sounds like you have a great guy helping you through. And that makes a huge difference, my husband is a labor & delivery rockstar too.  Big Smile

  • I was definitely more nervous the second time around.  My second was my first homebirth, so I still had some elements of the unknown, but I really do think that overall my ignorance was bliss before I had my first Smile  This time, knowing what to expect, I psyched myself out a few times.  When it came time for it though, I was able to get my head into it and while I was worried at one point that I might run out of energy before I was able to push him out, I never once had that moment of "I can't do this anymore" because I knew with all of my being that I could! 

    My second labor did end up being more painful but I had a bigger baby with a posterior presentation - I'm really hoping that won't be the case when we have a third!  Overall the labor was shorter - really only 4 hours of hard work - and I had no tearing, no need for stitches and my recovery was much easier too.  If you did it once you'll be able to do it again, trust me!

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  • I was nervous before my second too, because with my first I had back labor and over two hours of pushing.  As excited as I was to meet my new little boy, I kept thinking to myself, "I can't believe I have to do this again."  I had to consciously work to overcome those negative feelings both during my pregnancy and while in active labor so that I was in the right mindset for natural childbirth.  My second labor was three and a half hours start to finish, from first little twinge to hello baby!  I arrived at the hospital fully dilated, pushed five or six times, it was glorious.  I hope it will be the same for you.  Think positive and good luck!!
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  • Thank you ladies. I know you are right.  WIth my first I went in with the attitude "I really want a natural birth - but I dont know what to expect." I never took natural birthing classes so I truly think ignorance was bliss at that point. Now I think I know too much - between reading online and experiencing it once already! So I think I am just psyching myself out to be honest.

    I was in the hospital Friday with contractions. They actually admitted me and my contractions fizzled out. I decided not to have the pitocin or let them break my water for fear that it would start contractions that I wouldnt be able to handle. So I am really trying to make this happen.

  • Appreciate all the answers...feeling in the same nervous boat at times leading up to #2. It's nice to read how others dealt with it.
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  • I am extremely nervous!  My first was a disaster.  I was all set with going natural, but things went all wrong.  I was 12 days late.  I went into labor on my own on Friday afternoon.  I waited at home in labor until Sunday morning at 3AM (when I couldn't take it anymore, but my water still hadn't broken.  When I got to the hospital I was 6 cm dilated and everything was looking good, but I stopped progressing.  I was 9cm at 10am and was still 9cm at 1:30pm.  So they broke my water, and the contractions were ridiculous.  I ended up getting an epidural (I hadn't slept in three days, I needed a nap).  Well, long story short - I ended up getting an emergency c-section - no meds they didn't work.  I felt everything, went into shock, and was put under general anesthesia.  I missed the birth of my daughter!!!!  Because I had so many complications (I was also recut and restitched 4 weeks later, because was not sewn tightly enough), it has been recommended that I have another C section.  It's scheduled 8 days before my due date.  I am somewhat praying that I go early, and do everything on my own the way I wanted the first time around, but I am super scared!!!!  If anyone has had a similar experience, please share!!!!!!
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