Upstate NY Babies

Private parts

What age do you guys teach vagina (vulva, whatever) and penis? And the difference between boys and girls?

I had been telling dd vagina like during diaper changes and bath if it came up - no different than knee and foot etc.

2 nights ago dd barged in on dh in the shower and asked if his poop was falling out of his butt (lol). But ever since after each time she went to the potty she would again ask of daddy's poop was falling out. So I told her that was a penis and boys have penises. Dh thinks she is too young and I should have just said daddy is a boy and you are a girl, and not said penis. But I think that would be more confusing. Of course she is walking around now saying boys have a penis, which I think is why he thinks she was too young. But I figure that will pass in a few days (hopefully)! 

Re: Private parts

  • Omg I am laughing so hard right now I am praying I don't wake Julia who is asleep on my chest!!! I would say just tell her the names and if you act like its no big deal maybe she will follow suit?

    ETA: I can totally hear her saying that in her little high pitched voice! Lol 

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  • I know! I am trying so hard not to laugh bc I don't want her to think its a joke. But I said it just matter of fact and moved on. But every time she goes potty it's like she is reminded and brings it up again! I know it will pass, but not sure if dh is right that she is too young? I guess I figured if she noticed, she should be given the correct name?
  • We have also taught Justin to say penis when he needs to talk about his privates. So when we brought the babies home he was not even 2 1/2 yet- the 1st time he watched a diaper change he screamed in horror, "somebody stole Natalie's penis!!!". So that's when we had "the talk", he still gets confused sometimes with who's a boy, who's a girl, aunt/uncle, mr/mrs etc... but for the most part he gets it.

     

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  • That girl is hilarious.

    R has know about his penis for a long time. He has seen me without pants and asks if that is a penis. I said no, I was a girl and girls don't have them. If he gets a little sister I will tell him she has a vagina, but for now he cans stick with just knowing boys have a penis and girls just don't. He knows I have breasts/nipples, he knows he has nipples. He saw a pimple on my face and said it was a nip....uh, nope not up there! lol

    I prefer the real terms, he has never be told pee pee or any other term for his parts than penis. 

    She may be proud of what she knows for awhile until it wears off, don't be shocked if she tells the folks at church that daddy has a penis. If you giggle or try and distract her she will see it as a fun game, try and be matter of fact.

  • imageMrsWhiteonWhiteSt:

    We have also taught Justin to say penis when he needs to talk about his privates. So when we brought the babies home he was not even 2 1/2 yet- the 1st time he watched a diaper change he screamed in horror, "somebody stole Natalie's penis!!!". So that's when we had "the talk", he still gets confused sometimes with who's a boy, who's a girl, aunt/uncle, mr/mrs etc... but for the most part he gets it.


     

    Im dying. LOLOLOLOL

    I have no experience with this yet, but I figure when the time comes and Owen asks, I will just tell him the names... girls have a vagina, boys have a penis. Daddy and Owen are boys, Mommy is a girl... etc.

    I fully expect to share awesome embarrassing stories of Owen shouting out penis/vagina/etc in a supermarket, church, mall, etc.

  • I know I'm in the minority on this but I won't be teaching the words penis and vagina for a long time. I think it's beyond weird for a little kid to say penis and vagina.  I think privates is MORE than sufficient and there is no NEED for the real terms for quite a while. Heck - I hate the word vagina and never use it. But - I'm talking about the word "privates"....not willy or twinkie or other stupid stuff.

    We'll teach that there are boy privates and girl privates and no one should ever touch yours, because that is what they are - private.

    Obviously this isn't forever but I'm not all about official sex ed to toddlers haha..

  • When I first told Reed that his was called a penis he cracked up laughing and said "No, mommy, it's not Peanuts!"  hahaha  I used to shower with him all the time until he started noticing our differences.  He told me I had a "butt in the front" ...nice and caught a glimpse of a tampon string a long time ago at which he kept asking me to "open up so I can see what you got in there".  I almost died and needless to say, stopped showering with him.  Pierce is still oblivious though he does call his penis a peeper.  I will teach him the right word soon enough, but I am just proud of him that he knows pee comes out of his peeper and poop out of his butt and he successfully makes his deposits in the toilet!
  • This whole thread has me cracking up! I just wanted to add that my mom has never let me forget that I used to mix up the words vagina and lasagna. I would use them interchangeably. Oops :-)
  • My kids take baths together and never even noticed the difference until a few months ago.  I told Ty to wash his penis, he did and handed the soap to Bri and told her it was her turn to wash her penis.  She looked down and said "My penis?"  I just said that she didn't have a penis because she was a girl.  Ty was a bit curious and just repeated me in a question form and that was the end.  It just wasn't important for either of them to think of any more.

    I have always been really good about using the correct word for penis, and Ty thinks of it no different than using the word hand or foot.  But he certainly understands it is a private area that is only OK for family and Dr to see.   I am not so good with Bri.  I really just don't have the right word for it.  It isn't her vagina so I don't want to use that word, her vagina isn't something she would even be aware of yet. I guess it is her vulva and I should use that word.  Right now she referrs to everything as her but.  I probably should distinguish between the areas.

    Now, the day that your daughter tries to stand and pee like her brother?  That one is a little more difficult to explain.  Luckily the time Bri tried it, she was young enough that I didn't have to go into much explaination.  She does know that a urinal is a boy's potty and that she has to use a girl's potty.

  • imageMrsWhiteonWhiteSt:

    We have also taught Justin to say penis when he needs to talk about his privates. So when we brought the babies home he was not even 2 1/2 yet- the 1st time he watched a diaper change he screamed in horror, "somebody stole Natalie's penis!!!". So that's when we had "the talk", he still gets confused sometimes with who's a boy, who's a girl, aunt/uncle, mr/mrs etc... but for the most part he gets it.


     

    Im dying. LOLOLOLOL

    I have no experience with this yet, but I figure when the time comes and Owen asks, I will just tell him the names... girls have a vagina, boys have a penis. Daddy and Owen are boys, Mommy is a girl... etc.

    I fully expect to share awesome embarrassing stories of Owen shouting out penis/vagina/etc in a supermarket, church, mall, etc.

  • imageTelyco:

    I know I'm in the minority on this but I won't be teaching the words penis and vagina for a long time. I think it's beyond weird for a little kid to say penis and vagina.  I think privates is MORE than sufficient and there is no NEED for the real terms for quite a while. Heck - I hate the word vagina and never use it. But - I'm talking about the word "privates"....not willy or twinkie or other stupid stuff.

    We'll teach that there are boy privates and girl privates and no one should ever touch yours, because that is what they are - private.

    Obviously this isn't forever but I'm not all about official sex ed to toddlers haha..

    Telyco- I am with you on this one. I don't mind the word penis so much, but if I had a girl I would have a harder time saying vagina.  I just don't like the word either.  I would probably say "privates" too.   

  • imageTinyPinkBug:

    My kids take baths together and never even noticed the difference until a few months ago.  I told Ty to wash his penis, he did and handed the soap to Bri and told her it was her turn to wash her penis.  She looked down and said "My penis?"  I just said that she didn't have a penis because she was a girl.  Ty was a bit curious and just repeated me in a question form and that was the end.  It just wasn't important for either of them to think of any more.

    I have always been really good about using the correct word for penis, and Ty thinks of it no different than using the word hand or foot.  But he certainly understands it is a private area that is only OK for family and Dr to see.   I am not so good with Bri.  I really just don't have the right word for it.  It isn't her vagina so I don't want to use that word, her vagina isn't something she would even be aware of yet. I guess it is her vulva and I should use that word.  Right now she referrs to everything as her but.  I probably should distinguish between the areas.

    Now, the day that your daughter tries to stand and pee like her brother?  That one is a little more difficult to explain.  Luckily the time Bri tried it, she was young enough that I didn't have to go into much explaination.  She does know that a urinal is a boy's potty and that she has to use a girl's potty.

    I mean, I know you are right, but I dont think there is really a need to get all anatomical with a 2-3 year old. Even at nearly 30, I just refer to it all as "my vagina" - I dont think Ive used the word vulva when describing my own lady bits.

  • As of now we say "privates" a lot.  I think I've said vagina a few times but DH always uses privates with A.  I have no problem using the real terms, but just havent had a reason to yet
  • we use penis with Ethan and tell Sophia we have to wash her girly bits. 

    Why does vagina sound like such a dirty word?

  • imagejewelsonu:

    we use penis with Ethan and tell Sophia we have to wash her girly bits. 

    Why does vagina sound like such a dirty word?

    I always wonder the same thing.  We use the word penis regularly...it's amazing how much a boy likes to talk about his penis!  And while I've used the word vagina with him, and will with Riley, it makes me more uncomfortable for some reason.  

  • imageBethPSU:
    He told me I had a "butt in the front" ...nice and caught a glimpse of a tampon string a long time ago at which he kept asking me to "open up so I can see what you got in there".  I almost died and needless to say, stopped showering with him. 

    OMG, lol!

    I think we're going to go the privates bit way too, but right now we usually say lady bits.  This thread made me glad to have two kids of the same sex though, as least they'll have the same equipment so less confusion.  

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  • Stella has known the word vagina for quite a while now.  I think it's important for her to know the correct terms (even though it's techincally vulva, but how often is it referred to as that?).  Luckily we haven't had any issues with her seeing DH (yet!) but when we do we'll address the correct term for his man parts as well.  It's a little uncomfortable, but that's parenting sometimes.
    DD1: 3/31/10 DD2: 9/7/11
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