And...I'm bored during this waiting period
lafayettegirl
member
Each passing day grinds on me a little bit more. I know we are still new to this particular waiting game, but we truly have been waiting so long for a child that this period feels like it is taking FOREVER and it has only been a couple of weeks. I find myself checking my cell phone constantly for a call from the SW. I check the stats on our blog, which is linked to the agency's website. In the last week we've had 9 hits, but you can't tell if those are other waiting parents, the agency, or potential birth moms.
We're doing some work around the house and I'm looking at furniture to go in the nursery, but we are trying to take things slow. MIL offered to pain a mural in the nursery at Easter (she's an amazing painter) but I'm afraid to commit to that because I don't want this decked out nursery sitting there empty.
How do I keep myself from getting completely obessed with the nursery, messing with the blog, rethinking our photo album and Dear Birthparent letter, etc? I feel like I may go nuts and my job performance could suffer! ARGH!
Re: And...I'm bored during this waiting period
I understand how you feel! I was the same way for the first couple of months. Unlike you, we went ahead and got most things ready-the nursery is done (gender neutral-we will add boy or girl accents when the time comes). We have also bought a carseat, stroller, p-n-p, diapers, and a few gender neutral pieces of clothing. I wanted to be a little ready in case we get a last minute placement...
I admit, I still think about our adoption process every day-but now the thoughts just come and go-they aren't all consuming like they were at first. Some days are better than others-I still have days that I am on the agency website 5 times a day counting the number of families in the pool. But, i think I have finally gotten myself to the point of being excited instead of obsessed about the process, if that makes any sense.
I hope your wait (and ours too!) is a short one. Good luck :-)
~Jenn
My best advice is to stay very busy. Plan a trip or two if you can. The planning + the actual trip will be distracting.
Do A LOT of date nights. They may be few & far between in the future. Go out with your girlfriends, make a list of home projects to finish.
I know you're taking the nursery/baby prep slow. If you feel like researching, pick up a copy of Baby Bargains and make master lists. I shopped like crazy while we were waiting. ;-)
I know it is hard . . . I can tell you that once that baby arrives, time will fly way too quickly.
Thanks everybody!
I do have a copy of Baby Bargains - in fact, I've been through it so often it is highlighted, tabbed, etc.! (Yeah - I'm that girl. You should see our file cabinet at home!) I also started a baby registry (not public) on Amazon and have been looking at websites to get nursery ideas.
We've got 2 car seats (both hand-me-downs from friends), a stroller and a rocking chair. The room still has a bunch of other stuff in it that needs to be moved to other parts of the house. After that is done I think we'll go ahead and buy a crib and a dresser/changer piece. That will probably be about it, especially since the room is small.
I just want to get to the point where I am not thinking about it at every waking moment! That is the hardest part of this whole thing.
Waiting is hard.
Something I've not seen discussed much is that our waiting period is different than a pregnancy when it comes to finances. It slayed me to see other friends jet off to Hawaii for a baby-moon or plan and prepare designer nurseries. My guess is that most adoptive parents are like we were-- pinching pennies and well consumed with the financial end of adoption. Even though we were well prepared, we knew we wanted two or three children so the idea of dropping an extra $5K on a extras for the "perfect nursery" made my head spin because I knew that money could help with another baby.
(Okay..end of rant!)
Things that helped us-- we took parenting classes, I learned to knit, we researched and interviewed pediatricians, and we scheduled a few close by getaways (thanks to Name Your Own Price at priceline).
Things I wish we'd done-- I wish I would have done more chores. The yucky organization of garage and closets, etc. Now I have no time and yearn to get these yucky tasks done. I also wish I would have planned my to-dos with baby better. I knew I wanted to do monthly pictures but there are so many creative things to do (think Pinterest). Once the baby is here, time is so limited. Oh, and movies. DH and I have not seen a movie in ages. Go to as many as you'd like!