What have your SKs said that upset you?

Phantomgirl · November 2008

The first time we ever took SS anywhere with us as a couple, he asked me if i had any children (he was 5) i said no i didn't and he looked at me and said 'no doubt you'll be PG soon enough'. I just smiled and asked him what PG ment and he said he did not know. So i guess BM had been talking and assumed i was like her.

Also when SO and I opened our shop last January SS came to visit one day and he informed me that his mom had told him that I only work in the shop and when he gets big he can work there if he wants because the shop would be his.

I replied - that would be a great help, Ask you mum when she thinks you'll be old enough to help out. I really hope he did ask her as I bet she would die if she knew he told me.

FloF9 · November 2008

It wasn't what he said - more like what he heard from his family.

BM's mother - told SS that we should be treating him like a prince as he's the first born.

SS told me that his bad behavior was due to him being a child of divorce. I know what he means but he was 8 at the time. So where did he get that from? Plus he NEVER lived with both parents. They divorced right after he was born and lived apart.

Ilumine · November 2008

I get the usual I Hate you's, I don't like you's, Your evil, Your mean, I wish dad hadn't married you, etc. These are very rare and only when he is in a huge fit.

But he once told me that he wished I was dead. That one stung a bit and resulted in a huge punishment.

BM has been VERY good at not bad mouthing me to the boy (or at least nothign that we can see). While she doesn't follow the CO rule of no guilts, she does follow that one.

PlannedChaos · November 2008

OMG, I don't have enough characters to list it all. I wish it was as simple as little things kids pick up - like when I was 5 or so, and told my dad's GF to get her dirty paws off my hair (She was doing my hair in rollers for the night, since dad was supposed to drop us off at church the next morning. GF was a hair dresser, so KNEW what she was doing, but my mom had thrown a fit previously, and I obviously picked up on that!)

No, my SD instead says stuff like that I beat her in the face with frying pans, and that I've shoved food down her throat (oh, but conversely has also said I starve her), um...god - most of it is pretty bad. As you can probably tell, SD has some pretty severe emotional/mental issues and has really made being her mom a tough thing. Never mind that the things she claims would be OBVIOUS if they were happening. I have half a mind to sit her down in front of the computer and SHOW HER what actual abused children look like.

JamieNIan · November 2008

When SS gets put on time out, he starts a huge crying fit and explaims that he wants his mommy.... he says "real mommy" if it's me. He only sais this because he KNOWS this makes us feel as bad as he thinks he feels at the time. This gets to Dh heart strings because SS is only 6 and hasn't lived with his mom since he was 3 and she doesn't come to visit him often. Dh usually lets him go when he starts that. It used to get to me because I am as close to a true mom as he has EVER had. But now I just tell him if he wants her to go pack his stuff and I will take him there. Since when/if he does go with her she spends her time screaming at him, or he is bored and brings him home early, he really doesn't want her. He almost ALWAYS stops his rants. Other times it will be mom-mom and pop (who actually have custody). I tell him the same thing there. And that even if he goes there, he will be on time out during the allotted time.

anniya77 · November 2008

It's not so much what he states, but in what he doesn't.

When he's leaving with his mom, he completely ignores me and pretends I don't exist. But before she gets there, he talks to me, hugs me, etc.

That really hurts. And he's starting to do it to his little brother now, too, which scares me.

I know he's only 5, but it still hurts. A hug or even just a goodbye without being reminding would be nice.

taagent · November 2008

She hasn't said anything out of anger yet but SD has on a few occassions said she wants to get something for mother's day and says for her "real mom" and for me. The real mom stings a little since although I may not have given birth to her I am probably more of a mother to her than BM - who can't be bothered.

j+k · November 2008

I have a long list but I'd have to say all the ridiculous lies that SD told me about her dad to try and start fights between us.

When she called me the c word

And then there are all the times she inferred that I've never had kids, so that is why I don't understand her and her brother and why I struggle being a parent to them.

Serendipity07 · November 2008

I have a mile long list of weird stuff too but the major thing is how the kids act fine around us (sometimes they try to act like there's a competition, which we quickly and maturely shut down - i.e.: I'll say "Dad and I planted some hydrangeas out front last summer...and SS will say "Well, we have some at our house too..." Uh ok. That's nice!)

But the kids will act fine around us for the most part, and even be loving, etc...but then if BM is around they do a total 180, and when they go home from our house, they make up all sorts of outlandish lies that DH and I "talked bad about BM the whole time they were with us' and then that gets her going because she believes them, she in turn acts like a cuckoo, and so ensues the harrassing emails, texts and phone calls about what a sh!t bag DH is and that I'm not a real mom, blah, blah, blah. We've tried talking to the boys about it, but they even say they feel the need to "report back to BM" or else...(she looooves drama and if there isn't any, she has to try and stir some up)

So DH and I can almost make bets on if it will be 23 or 45 hours before we get the first nasty call, with either BM or her husband screaming on the other end at us. (BM normally is a big baby, although very bold over email - most of the time with things like this, she'll now have her current husband call to scream at us...to which they get no response, except "CLICK" - you can't reason with crazy, brainwashed people - we've made the mistake of trying in the past.)

MmeGrolleau · November 2008

Some days he makes up lies like we spit on the floor. He plays a tape of his BM reading him stories and then plays it for us at 8am to wake us up....we-hate-that. He kills DH when he goes on and on about how great BM's boyfriend is and says that it was BM's boyfriend that did things that were actually done by DH. He cried during a week when we put him to bed (while on vacation) cuz he wanted his mom only cuz she told him that if he was really sad she would come pick him up while we have had him often before for longer and he didn't cry once. He is not the one that upsets us, we know that all that he says comes from his BM. He shocks us, like when he told us that his dad left him cuz his dad wanted to play more on the computer and SS BM wasn't letting DH. DH had to leave the room for a while after that. We told him the truth of course. He says that he doesn't like going to his grandparents which kills me, I know he loves it there when he gets there he is all smiles, only cuz his BM told him that she has a hard time getting a hold of SS only cuz she calls DH's cell and its often dead over there. She can always call the home line over there which she has and did often before she called once and SS didn't want to talk to her (cuz he and I were busy playing a game) and she asked him if we were not letting him talk to her. We know this cuz their conversation was recorded by the answering machine, not on purpose. oof, there is lots more but I think I'll stop there before I start getting mad.

Want a personalized experience?

What have your SKs said that upset you?

Re: What have your SKs said that upset you?

Choose Another Board

Search Boards