Shower with No Games and No Gift Opening

G$Wifey · February 2012

I told my friend that is throwing my shower that I don't want to have any games, but would rather have a couple different craft tables. 1 to decorate onesies for the baby and a 2nd for scrapbooking. Guests can decorate a sheet in the babies scrapbook welcoming him/her. I also don't want to open gifts at my shower. This is just a pet peeve of mine sitting and watching gift oening during a shower. hahah Call me crazy, but do you think guests will be disappointed in this OR should I not care and just do what I want for MY shower. Wink

FemShep · February 2012

I don't think guests will mind the lack of games at all. I do think not opening the gifts is rude-babies are fun to shop for, and it's always nice to see what adorable things other people found (as well as see your own gift appreciated). Yes, I get that it's YOUR shower, but think about your guests and their enjoyment as well.

Natalie3398 · February 2012

I get what you are going for but a lot of people will be annoyed at this. 1st because not everyone is as creative and will not want to participate in crafts. 2nd Some people think it's very boring. Also people want some games and they love to win some prizes. This makes the time pass quicker as well.

As for the gift opening...many people will question you about it and they also want the mom to be to open gifts at the shower. I think you should reconsider, though it's your shower it's a nice way for your guests to feel appreciated with all the ooos and ahhhs when you open their gift.

G$Wifey · February 2012

Thanks ladies. I will take all of this into consideration. I am, however, doing gift bags for all guests so everyone does leave with some great gifts since I don't want the games. I will "really" have to consider the gift opening. Smile

EastCoastBride · February 2012

People are taking time out of their lives and spending money on you - they will expect the gift opening and some will be upset if you dont' do it. It's "your" shower, but it's their time and money.

The gift opening doesn't have to be that bad... Be relatively quick about it, and a HUGE recommendation - make sure there is music playing. Most showers I've been to- if they are festive, music playing, etc, people chit chat and talk during the gift opening so ALL EYES aren't ON YOU the entire time.

But one shower I went to- no music and it was deathly silent in the room, and therefore no one wanted to be the one to talk outside of the gift opening. So.... we all sat there and stared at the MTB. Honestly- that was kind of painful!

EastCoastBride · February 2012

Oh, I have no issue w/ the no games! The crafts... eh, I'm not a crafty person and being ptu on the spot to do a craft makes me nervous, to be honest. I'd MUCH rather sit and chit chat while the MTB opens gifts than having to sit at a table and do a craft!

ccam · February 2012

No games is perfectly fine - I've been to plenty of showers without games. But I would rethink the gift opening. People might find this rude. They spent time and money picking out and wrapping something for you and most people expect to see you open it. That is, to me at least, the point of the shower! Also, is your friend fine with purchasing all of the craft supplies that you requested? I could see suggesting the crafts, but ultimately its up to the host. Some people might not be very into the crafts either, it all depends.

kelle017 · February 2012

ccam:
No games is perfectly fine - I've been to plenty of showers without games. But I would rethink the gift opening. People might find this rude. They spent time and money picking out and wrapping something for you and most people expect to see you open it. That is, to me at least, the point of the shower!

This. If I spent the time to go to the store and look up a registry and get something and then the time to go to the shower, I'm going to be dissapointed if I don't get to see someone open my gift.

ImThisBabysMom · February 2012

I agree with PPs about no games not being an issue. It's always the same games at every shower I've been to anyways. On the crafts....if people don't want to participate, they won't. So its up to you and hostess if you want to have that done.

About gifts....I agree. I think majority of people will think its rude or be disappointed. You may not want to be watched or you may think its boring, but I'm guessing most guests will disagree. I had a room full of people and each outfit I held up, I had to spin around the room to show because if I didn't, people asked to see it.

NJbaby2012 · February 2012

Guests like to coo at baby things. I think they'll be disappointed by not seeing you smile at their gift while they stare at you - I get what you're saying but I think you gotta do it. lol

morethancottoncandy · February 2012

I think people can either take or leave the games, but IMHO your guests will want to see their gift opened and might find it rude if you don't. I'm not crazy about the idea of making onesies or scrapbooking either. I'm not a crafty person and honestly I would feel kind of put on the spot about participating.

ryry1977 · February 2012

The crafts sound good instead of silly games. I do think you should open the gifts. Everyone is nice enough to buy them for you, let them see you open it.

whirlybird27 · February 2012

Ambsies:
G$Wifey:
I also don't want to open gifts at my shower. This is just a pet peeve of mine sitting and watching gift oening during a shower. hahah Call me crazy, but do you think guests will be disappointed in this OR should I not care and just do what I want for MY shower.
If I were a guest at this shower I would see it as: please take time out of your busy schedule to go buy me presents and then come to MY party, but please don't burden me with opening your gifts.

You said this much nicer than I could have. All I heard was ' me me me..'. I understand it's 'your' shower but if you don't want to take the time to consider others don't have a shower.

rhubarb123 · February 2012

OK...your only 18 weeks pregnant so most likely your hostess hasn't looked into the financial aspect of your "craft" idea. As a hostess I have wanted to do the onesies and quite frankly it is very expensive. Not the onesies so much...but buying the fabric markers, etc. I actually attended a shower that did this and seriously each person got ONE marker! We had to practically beg, borrow, or steal another color...and wait forever (it seemed). It made the whole thing boring. If you are only having a few people at your shower your hostess could probably do this, but not if there are over 15-20 people.

As far as opening gifts...I would insist you open the gift I brought. What is the sense in having a shower if you are not opening the gifts? Just make it a drive-up shower...they can drive up, drop the gift off at the end of the driveway and leave. Seriously, guests WILL be disappointed if you don't open gifts. You may not like watching gift opening but that is not the case with others. Yes, it is YOUR shower...but I would hope you would want your guests to feel comfortable. For those of your friends and family that you think dislike gift opening...maybe that is when they could make their scrapbook page for you.

msawicki03 · February 2012

I am going through the EXACT same thing. I am doing optional craft tables, and I am not opening presents, but I am letting people know on the invitation that I will open their gifts if they want, but otherwise, it is called a "baby celebration." I am having a pool party, food, drinks, and a few crafts. The onsies craft can be very expensive, and they grow out of them REALLY quickly. I have decided to buy about a dozen, whoever gets there first can design them. Don't feel pressure to do anything you don't want to, just make sure that people know what to expect before they come. If they come expecting a typical shower, they might be upset if you dont open gifts. Just make sure that you are upfront with them.

eav2c · February 2012

I personally like the idea of craft tables. That sounds way more exciting to me than shower games. However, not opening gifts is a no-no. I know, it's totally weird to open gifts in front of people and can be a little tedious and awkward but... that's basically what a shower is for... gifts. You owe your guests the decency of opening them in front of them. Just suck it up and have it a good time. We've all had to do it and I promise... we survived

GL!

LM915 · February 2012

Personally, I would love to go to a shower where the gifts weren't opened. I hate that part of every shower I go to, it's so boring. I know I'm totally in the minority on that though. lol

The craft idea is fine for some people. I went to a shower where they had craft stuff going on, but I just didn't participate because I know nothing about scrapbooking or the stuff that was on the table.

Liz4444 · February 2012

msawicki03:
I am going through the EXACT same thing. I am doing optional craft tables, and I am not opening presents, but I am letting people know on the invitation that I will open their gifts if they want, but otherwise, it is called a "baby celebration." I am having a pool party, food, drinks, and a few crafts. The onsies craft can be very expensive, and they grow out of them REALLY quickly. I have decided to buy about a dozen, whoever gets there first can design them. Don't feel pressure to do anything you don't want to, just make sure that people know what to expect before they come. If they come expecting a typical shower, they might be upset if you dont open gifts. Just make sure that you are upfront with them.

Confused I would be very put off if I saw this on an invitation. Gifts should never be mentioned on an invitation. I see that you are calling your party a baby celebration, that's fine, you don't have to open gifts, but don't mention them at all on the invite and don't include any registry information.

Liz4444 · February 2012

OP, just because a party is in your honor doesn't mean that you should ignore the feelings and comfort of your guests.

FemShep · February 2012

Ambsies:
Liz4444:
msawicki03:
I am going through the EXACT same thing. I am doing optional craft tables, and I am not opening presents, but I am letting people know on the invitation that I will open their gifts if they want, but otherwise, it is called a "baby celebration." I am having a pool party, food, drinks, and a few crafts. The onsies craft can be very expensive, and they grow out of them REALLY quickly. I have decided to buy about a dozen, whoever gets there first can design them. Don't feel pressure to do anything you don't want to, just make sure that people know what to expect before they come. If they come expecting a typical shower, they might be upset if you dont open gifts. Just make sure that you are upfront with them.

I would be very put off if I saw this on an invitation. Gifts should never be mentioned on an invitation. I see that you are calling your party a baby celebration, that's fine, you don't have to open gifts, but don't mention them at all on the invite and don't include any registry information.
ITA! I wouldn't even go if I received that invite (unless you were a very, very good friend and in that case I'd be trying to talk some sense in to you). I'd take one look at the invite and think "tacky!".

Agree 100%. I'd read that invite as, "Gimme stuff, but don't expect me to thank you for it or recognize you in any way" and would skip the party and gift accordingly.

mamigee98@yahoo.com · February 2012

Guests will definitely be disappointed if you don't open their gifts in front of them. I think that's kind of rude. The no games thing is fine as long as you have the craft stuff for them to do. I'm not a fan of baby showers with absolutely NO games, those all have been boring to me.

acbfreire · February 2012

G$Wifey:
I also don't want to open gifts at my shower. This is just a pet peeve of mine sitting and watching gift oening during a shower. hahah Call me crazy, but do you think guests will be disappointed in this OR should I not care and just do what I want for MY shower.

I couldn't agree with you more! I think it is very rude to open gifts in front of everybody because it makes the people that could only afford something small feel like cr@p!

I don't want any games either. I love your idea of the crafts!

PinkHighlighter · February 2012

acbfreire:

G$Wifey:
I also don't want to open gifts at my shower. This is just a pet peeve of mine sitting and watching gift oening during a shower. hahah Call me crazy, but do you think guests will be disappointed in this OR should I not care and just do what I want for MY shower.

I couldn't agree with you more! I think it is very rude to open gifts in front of everybody because it makes the people that could only afford something small feel like cr@p!

I don't want any games either. I love your idea of the crafts!

I'm surprised about the many responses that feel it's rude not to open the presents. Maybe it's a regional thing or just certain groups, but most of my friends have not opened presents. It's totally boring, we don't ooh-and-ahh baby presents (half the time, theyr'e kinda boring things off the registry -- a diaper genie, a stroller, a breast pump, etc.). And we don't buy presents so others can see what we bought; we buy them for the guest of honor and coming baby. I couldn't care less if others see what I bought!

I also think shower games are super boring. Bingo? Guess the width of the MTB's belly? For me, the fun part of the shower is chatting with my pregnant friend (and other friends who I don't see that often).

I'd much rather see a craft table (even if I choose not to do anything crafty) than do some shower game.

So, all that to say, think about your friends who will attend. You don't want to upset them, but, amongst my friends, not opening presents and not doing games wouldn't make you the rude and selfish person that the many responses you've received to this post would imply.

PinkHighlighter · February 2012

FemShep:
Ambsies:
Liz4444:

msawicki03:
I am going through the EXACT same thing. I am doing optional craft tables, and I am not opening presents, but I am letting people know on the invitation that I will open their gifts if they want, but otherwise, it is called a "baby celebration." I am having a pool party, food, drinks, and a few crafts. The onsies craft can be very expensive, and they grow out of them REALLY quickly. I have decided to buy about a dozen, whoever gets there first can design them. Don't feel pressure to do anything you don't want to, just make sure that people know what to expect before they come. If they come expecting a typical shower, they might be upset if you dont open gifts. Just make sure that you are upfront with them.

I would be very put off if I saw this on an invitation. Gifts should never be mentioned on an invitation. I see that you are calling your party a baby celebration, that's fine, you don't have to open gifts, but don't mention them at all on the invite and don't include any registry information.

ITA! I wouldn't even go if I received that invite (unless you were a very, very good friend and in that case I'd be trying to talk some sense in to you). I'd take one look at the invite and think "tacky!".

Agree 100%. I'd read that invite as, "Gimme stuff, but don't expect me to thank you for it or recognize you in any way" and would skip the party and gift accordingly.

I assume she'd still be writing thank you notes.

hunnygirl · February 2012

I like shower games, but would be totally fine if I went to a shower that just had craft tables. Perhaps you can suggest that people work in teams or groups so it will have a game feel or just be a good conversation starter.

As for gifts, I agree that people like to see what the MTB receives, but serve the cake while you are opening gifts. That gives people some distraction and doesn't make the shower take too much longer.

acbfreire · February 2012

PinkHighlighter:
FemShep:
Ambsies:
Liz4444:

msawicki03:
I am going through the EXACT same thing. I am doing optional craft tables, and I am not opening presents, but I am letting people know on the invitation that I will open their gifts if they want, but otherwise, it is called a "baby celebration." I am having a pool party, food, drinks, and a few crafts. The onsies craft can be very expensive, and they grow out of them REALLY quickly. I have decided to buy about a dozen, whoever gets there first can design them. Don't feel pressure to do anything you don't want to, just make sure that people know what to expect before they come. If they come expecting a typical shower, they might be upset if you dont open gifts. Just make sure that you are upfront with them.

I would be very put off if I saw this on an invitation. Gifts should never be mentioned on an invitation. I see that you are calling your party a baby celebration, that's fine, you don't have to open gifts, but don't mention them at all on the invite and don't include any registry information.

ITA! I wouldn't even go if I received that invite (unless you were a very, very good friend and in that case I'd be trying to talk some sense in to you). I'd take one look at the invite and think "tacky!".

Agree 100%. I'd read that invite as, "Gimme stuff, but don't expect me to thank you for it or recognize you in any way" and would skip the party and gift accordingly.

I assume she'd still be writing thank you notes.

Exactly. Just because you don't open them in front of people it doesn't mean that you will not write thank you notes.

mintjulio · February 2012

I like your ideas of crafts (your friend who is throwing your shower just may need to encourage people to participate) but I think it would be really fun! I agree with you on not opening gifts at your shower. It is pretty long and boring watching someone open gifts. At my wedding shower I didn't open gifts and it gave me more time to spend with friends and family. No one seemed disappointed either. One of my guests actually said how refreshing it was to not sit through gift opening. I don't think guests will be disappointed, just tell them that you would rather spend time with them at your party. It is your shower, so you should be able to do what you want, don't worry too much about what everyone will think.

msawicki03 · February 2012

Of course. A lot of people skip that part too, but I think it is important for every single person to know that it was important that they were there, and that I appreciate everything, meaning giving a gift, and participating in my celebration.

Want a personalized experience?

Shower with No Games and No Gift Opening

Re: Shower with No Games and No Gift Opening

Choose Another Board

Search Boards