Moms of toddlers and newborns...HOW?

arcook0307 · February 2012

Our first baby is almost 6 weeks old. I am fortunate to be able to nap with her during the day.....but can't imagine having another child when she is a toddler, although that's probably what we will shoot for. It's hard enough to get myself and the baby a bath and fix myself lunch.....how do you mamas do it? Do you just have to put the baby down to cry? At this point, I can't go pee without baby crying.....

kcisthebombdotcom · February 2012

I found going from 0-1 kids a lot tougher than 1-2. You're much more prepared for the newborn stuff the 2nd time around. The 2nd time around, if baby has to fuss for 1 minute so you can pee, it's not as big a deal. They don't break. Smile

I shower when DH is home and prep lunch during naptimes to avoid drama.

Lhand11 · February 2012

I think about this all the time! I don't know how it is possible!

ashleygirl04 · February 2012

You just do it. It was really tough in the beginning when DS2 was up most of the night and DS1 was up, bright eyed and bushy tailed, at 7:30 am. But, I didn't have a choice. I think my body just adapted to functioning on less sleep.

I do as much as I can while DH is home or while the baby is sleeping. I can usually get DS1 involved in a puzzle or TV show to shower if I have to. I will admit, though, DS1 is watching a lot more TV than I'd like. But, right now we gotta do what we gotta do.

Mrs.Greeko · February 2012

Eh, you learn a lot the longer you parent. One kids seems so difficult when you've only got one. With two or more you learn to do more things one handed, the toddler has to wait more often, you just figure it out. If baby two needs to be held a lot you wear them, or you figure out how to put them down more often than you do your first.

adri77 · February 2012

It's hard, no lie!!! I'm ok during the day, it's the evenings when all hell breaks lose!! And I have no DH relief, as he works till 9pm. I've started having my 14 year old neighbor come over Tues/Thurs right after dinner. She takes the boys right up for bath/teethbrushing and I either nurse the baby or clean up from dinner. Then when the boys are done, she takes the baby and I am able to read bedtime stories to the boys, which many nights (without her) i can't do bc that is the baby's fussy/hungry time. Durning the day, I try to set my boys up with as many activities as I can....even cleaning!!! They'll take the swiffer, swiffer duster, wet wipes and just clean things! We do lots of crafts, playdough, and YES, lots of TV and movies. But all of that gives me some time to nurse the baby and do laundry/cook/clean. The days are super tiring since the boys don't nap, so i can't really lay down and rest till the end of the night! But I LOVE it!!! *Most* of the time!!!

inlovewithB · February 2012

I have been thinking the same thing!! Our adoption agency is saying "want us to start looking for a little brother" and all I can do is laugh! We always wanted a large family, but now I can't imagine sharing my attention or LOVE with another baby.

Bride2b2004 · February 2012

Mrs.Greeko:
Eh, you learn a lot the longer you parent. One kids seems so difficult when you've only got one. With two or more you learn to do more things one handed, the toddler has to wait more often, you just figure it out. If baby two needs to be held a lot you wear them, or you figure out how to put them down more often than you do your first.

This.

I found DS1 HARD. Having 3 is busy... and when all 3 want me for things or one or more is sick can be hard, but I really think day to day is not as tough as with my first. Part of it is we are experienced (#2 and #3 had their food allergies dealt with immediately-- #1 had horrible "colic" for 12w before we understood his issue). A big part of it is (for me) that the kids entertain each other, making my job easier and I don't need to wrack my brain for things to do to entertain or stimulate. Another part is I developed my own opinions and don't get overly influenced by the "advice" of others (so it frees up guilt or things I would have done or not done out of guilt). Personally, I found it MUCH harder to go from 0-1 than from 1-2 or 2-3 (so far).

inlovewithB:
We always wanted a large family, but now I can't imagine sharing my attention or LOVE with another baby.

This is a whole separate issue and I worried about this each time we waited for a new baby to arrive. However, it turns out that what they say is true, you have the ability to love unconditionally each new child without it affecting your love for current ones. And the love and sibling bond they find with each other is heartwarming and more than makes up for the fact they have to share your time.

LDQAM516 · February 2012

You know what...you really just get used to it all the longer you have kids in your life and the more you have. You learn what you "can" do when you thought that was something your "shouldn't" do when you just had one. You will realize the baby won't die if you leave him or her in the bouncy seat on the floor if you run to the bathroom for a second...things like that. The only thing I "sometimes" struggle with is not being able to sleep when the baby sleeps if Iam feeling a little tired that particular day...but the other two keep me so busy that I really don't have time to think about being tired...Iam always up and doing something around the house...and it really all isn't bad at all...You will adjust.

Kim-n-Eric · February 2012

I hate to admit it, but one of the reasons i chose not to breastfeed (there were many reasons) was because i didnt want to have the baby attached to the boob all day when i still had a 3 year old to take care off. You just do what you can do and unfortunately, my kiddo loves tv so I can turn on one of his shows while baby is sleeping and shower. Luckily, my toddler loves to help clean and is great with the baby (no jealousy yet...) so it makes it easier. It's hard when they both need something but I've gotten really good At holding baby while propping a bottle under my chin and making lunch or playing with trucks.

celiabwatson · February 2012

It's not easy, but it's not as hard as you'd think. I wear the baby a lot when she's awake. I make sure to put her down for naps (I didn't always do that with my son, just kept wearing him if he fell asleep). When she's napping I do the more active play with my son since I have my whole body free. Also, my son still takes a decent nap every afternoon so most days there are times when their naps overlap. That's when I eat lunch/shower/pump etc. I also seize opportunities where I can. For example, if the baby is happy in her chair or swing 20 minutes before nap time I will attempt to put my son down early, if he's busy playing with a puzzle I will change her diaper or something.

You also do get a little more relaxed about hearing some crying, and even as a toddler my son can help with that to some degree. If I'm making him lunch and she's crying he'll talk to her or rock her gently (I have to watch closely, but my hands are free).

NiniJ55 · February 2012

I don't know - I just take it one day at a time. You have to multitask. Like I might pump and put DS on the potty at the same. Or Pump while feeding him lunch or feed them both at the same time (DS feeds himself -- I just need to supervise).

I can't take a shower without another person in the house though. DS will climb out of anything so I can't leave him unsupervised at all. DS often goes with me to the bathroom --but that was even before the baby was born.

You will figure it out when the time comes -- don't worry.

RA1109 · February 2012

I have an 8 week old and a 2 year old, and it's a BREEZE. Seriously, so easy. Going from 0-1 was SO hard, DH and I thought anyone with 2 kids was out of their mind. But as my 1st got older he became awesome, so we had a 2nd. So much easier! I'm already used to all the changes so nothing is new. I'm so much more confident as a mother, belong to moms groups so we leave the house every day and it's so easy. With my first I was desperate to go back to work. Now I'm a SAHM and it's awesome!

faeriequeeneonwow · February 2012

I'm only two weeks into this adventure, but it's surprisingly easy for the most part. My one issue (apart from still adjusting to sleep deprivation) is trying to get them fed when they both want to eat. I get DS a bottle and sit DD in her pnp with something like cheez-its or animal crackers to keep her busy until DS gets done and I can get her meal together. DD still naps well, sometimes twice a day, so I'm able to get stuff done while she naps even if I have to hold or wear DS while I work. I take a shower in the morning before DH goes to work or after DD has gone to bed while DS is in the bouncy seat or swing. Laundry gets tossed in throughout the day when I have a minute, but the dishes have to wait until after DD is in bed.

Today was an adventure - took both babies to the pediatrician for their 15 month and 2 week checks. It was a juggling act, but I was able to manage it without much issue.

adpenner89 · February 2012

I have a SUPER active 3.5 year old son (when I say SUPER active, think Taz from looney tunes... no joke.), a NB son AND my husband is deployed to Afghanistan and has been through almost my whole pregnancy... I have NO help at all. If I can do it, you can do it.

Want a personalized experience?

Moms of toddlers and newborns...HOW?

Re: Moms of toddlers and newborns...HOW?

Choose Another Board

Search Boards