Hello, let me introduce myself first..
For the first 30 years of my life, everything was smooth and worry-free. I was my parents’ most beloved child, found my true love in college, and happily married him after graduation.
At work, I was my boss’s most valued employee. Whenever I was in charge of a project, colleagues would inevitably say, “Oh, then I’m totally at ease.” I was constantly named “Employee of the Year,” with generous bonuses every year.
Later, I started my own business. Within just three months, I had broken into the market and started making money. By the fifth month, I was earning twice my previous salary. Growth was steady month after month. Right when the business needed more hands, I serendipitously met an amazing partner, and the company reached a whole new level.
Really, it seemed like at every step, whatever I needed, a pair of hands would always place it right in front of me, just in time.
My Two Girls: Ellie & Mia
Meet Ellie, My Firstborn
In 2020, my husband and I decided to have a child. After trying for over a year, we finally got the news in 2021 that a little one was on the way. In 2022, we welcomed our first child, Ellie. She made me a mother.
She is utterly adorable—big eyes, rosy skin, chubby little hands. Every time I look at her, I can’t help but give her a kiss. She is pure joy, and I love her more each day.
But as a first-time mom, I faced unprecedented difficulties. The postpartum tearing wouldn’t heal, and the pain was excruciating. Clogged milk ducts made my breasts hard as rocks. The severe sleep deprivation… And what was even more crushing was that, with zero parenting experience, I was clueless when faced with her unexplained wailing, night terrors, refusal to nurse, constipation, diarrhea, fevers… I desperately searched online, longing for one accurate, truly useful answer!
It was during this time that I thought, once I make it through this “dark” path, I must leave a light on for other new moms.
And Then Came Mia
Ellie had just turned one when I got pregnant again. In 2024, we welcomed our second daughter, Mia.
Completely different from Ellie, Mia is a great eater and sleeper. Although she had her fussy moments in the first two months, starting almost from month three, she became super easygoing. She feeds on schedule, gradually sleeps through the night, loves her solid foods, and adapted quickly when I had to stop breastfeeding due to mastitis.
This made me realize just how vastly different babies can be! It made me even more determined to write about my experiences.
Why I Had to Start This Blog
The Catalyst: A Life Pivoted
After Mia was born, my business also began to decline sharply. I had no choice but to close it and become a full-time mom. My work no longer involves Excel and Word, but instead revolves around changing diapers, washing bottles, making baby food, and managing household chores…
This has been a monumental challenge for me. All my past achievements seem irrelevant now. Managing two young children has brought me a sense of frustration I’ve never known before.
The Daily Reality
They are always fighting over things. When one is in my arms, the other immediately demands to be held too. When I try to cook, Ellie wants me to read her a book. When I attempt to load the washing machine, Mia has a diaper blowout, and I must drop everything to change her…
By the time I finish all that, I see the cup of hot coffee on the table has gone cold again. And it’s not until evening that I remember, “Oh my goodness, the clothes are still in the hamper, unwashed!”
Of course, being a mom is filled with happiness, but that doesn’t negate how hard it is.
My Promise to You
Because I’ve walked this path myself, I won’t just tell you how joyful motherhood is, like many websites do. I want to share my real, unfiltered experiences so every new mom can find a “companion” here.
I want to tell you: you are not alone. What you’re going through, I’ve been there too. Your breakdowns, your helplessness, your moments of losing control—I’ve had them all. You don’t need to feel guilty. This is just a small, necessary stretch of the journey for every mom.
My Hope for This Space
I really want to share my parenting experiences—not just the warm, glowing moments, but to honestly document the pitfalls I’ve stumbled into, the tears I’ve shed, and the “survival wisdom” I’ve scraped together in utter exhaustion.
The Goal: A Mom’s Toolkit
I hope this blog becomes a “mom’s toolkit,” filled not with vague theories, but with:
- Practical Tips: Like how to quickly figure out why a baby is crying, tried-and-true methods for dealing with clogged ducts, or how to efficiently manage the daily grind with twins (or two under two) solo.
- Pitfall Avoidance Guides: Sharing the baby products I regret buying the most, and those “game-changer” parenting hacks. Letting you know which parenting anxieties you can let go of, and which principles are worth holding onto.
- A Community for Moms: I hope my stories connect me with more moms like you. We can cheer each other on in the comments, share our own tricks, turning the storms we face alone into a journey we walk together.
The Bigger Vision
My previous career taught me to analyze data, solve problems, and optimize processes. Now, I’m applying all those skills to this new “position” of Mom. I want to prove that a mom’s value is absolutely not confined to the home. The mindset, resilience, and creativity we built in our careers can shine just as brightly—perhaps even brighter—in this more complex, long-term “project” of raising humans, and can even be transformed into a force that helps others.
My hope is simple: that every mom who opens this blog can let out a sigh of relief and say, “So it’s not just me.” Then, she can find a bit of practical info, a dose of comforting solidarity, and return to her sweet, chaotic mom-life with a little more confidence and a little less weight on her shoulders.
This road? Let’s walk it together.
snowflakemom
member
Re: How much help will you have post-partum?
I also have 2 daughters at home. a 2.5 yr old and a 17 month old. My Husband is taking a week from when baby is born off. I have my sister who is a teacher to help me (she will be on spring break for 2 weeks). I think after that 2 week mark I should be ok....But if not doing well I will have my mom take a day or 2 off to help out. I do not have stairs which can be really hard on you. Good luck!
The only help I have is my DH because my parents work full time, as do any friends that live close. DH works on the river and right now it looks like he will be scheduled to be on the boat during when our RCS will be ... but he is building up days so he can take off. He will be at home with me at least the first week then it's all on me.
I will have a 1st grader, a 12 month old, and the newborn. It's going to be hectic because we live 1/2 mile from the school and are required to drive DD1 so I will have to load everyone up just to go down the road every morning lol.
Good news is if we play our cards right with the schedule I should only have to do it alone for a week then DH will get back off the boat and get 2 weeks at home (giving me a break to recover again lol) and after that he will leave for 2 weeks, come back for 2, etc.
None. Week at the hospital then week with DH staying at home. That's it. But then this is my first and I have nobody else to take care of.
I feel ya - it might be better to suck it up and call in reinforcement, even if it is your MIL. Get lots of freezer meals ready. Breakfast too. I hear french toast keeps beautifully in the freezer.
Good luck!
Not much. C is on a Tuesday, DH will take off Tues/Wed/Thur/Friday from work. I will likely go home Friday morning, and he'll be home with us that day and through the weekend. My mom may take a day off and come up on Monday, but likely after that I will be alone. And I'll have a 2 year old too. Hoping that I can handle it. I will likely send DS to daycare for most of that first week so that he can keep his schedule, burn energy, etc. That will help.
Last time I had DS on Tuesday, he was released on Monday, DH took that Monday and Tuesday off, then I was by myself and I did fine.
I think with two others at home, you'd better line up help for a minimum of a week. If not your MIL, maybe a sitter to help with your older two or dinner or whatever?
DH went back to work a day or two after we came home each time. After DS, my mom stayed a week. It was really nice to have the companionship, but I know if she'd had to go home sooner, I would've been 100% fine - it's pretty easy with just a newborn. After DD, she and my dad stayed two weeks, and it was a HUGE help. I attribute my super easy recoveries in part to not having to jump right back into every day life when we got home. They helped around the house, took DS to the park and other activities, or held the baby while I showered or took a nap. This time, we've moved and live close to my parents, and I anticipate asking them to help out quite a bit after #3 comes home.
(read it. you know you want to.)
anderson . september 2008
vivian . february 2010
mabel . august 2012