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Typical custody arrangement?

ldooldoo member
in Single Parents

I know every situation is different, but can someone give me thoughts on what a typical custody arrangement would be for a 4 year old and 2 year old?

I don't think my kids would do well spending the night somewhere else (they may surprise me, though). But with both of us working full time, if the father didn't have them on some nights, he'd barely get to see the kids. And I don't want to do that to him or them.

I feel they're too young for a 50/50 split, and I want to provide as much security and stability as possible.

So what is a typical arrangement for kids that age?

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Re: Typical custody arrangement?

  • FyreFlyeRushFyreFlyeRush member
    No one can answer that for you, unfortunately. Every state, every case, every child and every situation is different. Odds are high in your favor of primary custody. Most judges won't take a child away from mom. Your best bet is to talk to a family lawyer with custody experience.
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  • ChunkyMunkeyChunkyMunkey

    In a judge's eyes it's not too young for a 50/50 split, I've seen it happen younger than that. There are A LOT of factors that go into it though like stability of each parent, children's dependency, home life, etc. Usually if you both can come to a mutual agreement and have it notarized a judge will just grant that.

    What do YOU want to happen? What's your reasoning? How involved has their father been? Does he want more time? Is he a stable secure person with no severe drug or alcohol use? 

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  • PrettyInPearls23PrettyInPearls23 member
    My DS is 2 y/o and my XH has visitation on Wednesday evenings from 4PM-7PM (which he has YET to actually take advantage of), and EOW from Friday 5PM-Sunday 5PM.

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  • haleyw458haleyw458 member

    Fellow Kansan here! I'm actually only about an hour and a half away from you!

    Most judges and mental health experts don't think 50/50 split is the best for the children. In Kansas, the normal visitation shedule is EOW-1 day during the week-and split holidays.

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  • ldooldoo member
    imagehaleyw458:

    Fellow Kansan here! I'm actually only about an hour and a half away from you!

    Most judges and mental health experts don't think 50/50 split is the best for the children. In Kansas, the normal visitation shedule is EOW-1 day during the week-and split holidays.

    Thanks for the information, fellow Kansan! I'd love to talk with you more about this. How do we do that? :)

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