I wish I wasn't so scared.

Re: I wish I wasn't so scared.

• Alauren4 member

  February 2012

  It's normal that you fear labor that is what has been instilled in women by the medical community and this is why most women have medicated births. I am actually looking forward to the euphoria I will feel duing labor and delivery of my baby. I really suggest you read Ina Mays Guide to Childbirth and Your Best Birth. These are books to help you understand the labor and delivery process, they are not just about natural birth. Good luck and I hope you can see that pregnancy, and labor and delivery are as natural for our bodies as breathing... It's a miracle...

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• bellelamb member

  February 2012

  I've done it twice and I'm not going to lie it is painful but honestly it isn't anything you can't handle. The fear of the unknown is way worse than the actual labor is. Honestly the thing I wish I had know is that labor is a lot of work it is very tiring. The other thing to remember is it doesn't last forever and when it is over you will have the best prize ever a sweet baby that is all yours. Also remember like pp said it is a very natural process millions of women have and will do it and you will be one of them. Trust me the stress you are putting yourself though now worrying about it is far worse than the actual labor will be.
  

  

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• ericamanuela

  February 2012

  Thank you. I think you are right, the fear of the unkown is what is scaring me the most. I know it sounds silly but from watching births I have a hard time comprehending that a vagina can stretch that much. I also have no idea how my insides will feel throughout this entire process. I've heard people describing it as knives stabbing them or that they're ripping in two!

  

  
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• amanda.beth

  February 2012

  ericamanuela:

  Thank you. I think you are right, the fear of the unkown is what is scaring me the most. I know it sounds silly but from watching births I have a hard time comprehending that a vagina can stretch that much. I also have no idea how my insides will feel throughout this entire process. I've heard people describing it as knives stabbing them or that they're ripping in two!

  Stop talking to these people:) The best thing you can do for yourself is educate yourself on the process of birthing and surround yourself with positive people. I have no idea why people love telling horror stories about birth so much! Hearing positive birth stories and having confidence in your body will hopefully release some of your fear that's been building up!

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• ericamanuela

  February 2012

  Tell me about it! My fiance thinks that perhaps these people are trying to prove how tough they are or want to bring attention to themselves. He thinks they are definitely trying to prove something. I hope he's right and that it doesn't feel like knives stabbing me or that my body is literally ripping in two!

  

  
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• Josie22

  February 2012

  It's sounds so much scarier then it actually is. The first time I was so scared about labor, and after. This time, a barely even think about it. The worst part of the first one, was getting an IV. The contractions aren't as bad as they sound. They hurt, but they're over-shadowed by the fact that your baby is coming.
  

  

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• Crossingfingers member

  February 2012

  I have no pain tolerance, and I've "signed on" to do it for the fourth time, so it really isn't that bad! I was also terrified the first time, but I did get an epidural, and things went very well. I think it is more common to hear about people who have problems because nobody wants to chime in and say, "I had the perfect labor & delivery.." KWIM? Labor does not last forever, and the end result is definitely worth any short-term pain you may have..

  
  

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• ericamanuela

  February 2012

  Thanks everyone, the more shared stories, the better I feel.

  

  
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• Mizsoccer83 member

  February 2012

  Thanks for posting this-as I am also going through my first pregnancy and have had MANY terrifying thoughts about the how the baby is actually getting to enter this world. I have also noticed that there are many people who love to tell their horror stories and I simply chalk it up for a need of attention or to proove something (even if they think they are telling me to help me become educated). I am trying not to think about it much and keeping options open for a birth plan at this point, while I educate myself on all options out there and what to expect. I think it is very natrual for people like you and I to be scared-we have never gone through something like this! Best of luck!

  

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• ericamanuela

  February 2012

  you see... this is what someone writes to me:

  contractions felt like I bus was on top of me. Like crushing pain. It wasn't even cramps it was like I was being ripped in two. It hurt my lower back and wrapped around to my belly and down my legs.  I wanted my husband to just punch me in my face so the pain would be somewhere else lol.

   See why I'm scared?!

  

  
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• KitKat83

  February 2012

  It's painful, but not as bad as I thought it would be.  Honestly I was in labour for 12 hours, made it to 7 or 8 cm before I got the epidural (I had to beg) they had to induce me because contractions stopped. Made it to 10 real quick after that and was about to start pushing when they discovered he was breech so had to wait over an hour for a c section.  They couldn't freeze me through the epidural so I had to be put under general anesthetic.   I had a pretty horrific experience, but all in all it wasn't that bad.  I'd do it again in a heartbeat and I don't have that high of pain tolerance either. When it comes down to it and you're actually in labour, you just go with it, your body knows what to do, and there'll be people there to help you through it.   Oh and time goes by SO FAST when youre in labour,  12 hours felt like 10 minutes.

   

  

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• ericamanuela

  February 2012

  Thanks for sharing. Is there a reason why you had to wait for a c-section? By the way, beautiful dog. Kind of looks like mine. I have a tiny little female weimaraner.

  

  
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• KitKat83

  February 2012

  Thanks!  She's a German shorthaired pointer, similar in shape and energy to a weim.  I had to wait because the on call team was already doing a c section so they had to call in another team.  By the time they got there his butt was so far down in my pelvis they could see his "junk" haha.   They asked if we knew what we were having and I said "no" and the nurse said "I do, I can see what is or isn't there" it was crazy!!! 

  E 

  

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• KitKat83

  February 2012

  I just had mastitis 2 weeks ago, and that was more painful and traumatizing than labour was if that helps you feel better about it . 

   

  Edited to add;  I totally understand what your feeling right now.  I was there a couple months ago and the anxiety of it almost killed me!!   Just know that it probably won't happen so fast that it'll hit you like a ton of bricks, it usually starts off pretty mild and gradually gets more intense, so your body will naturally prepare for it and you'll be in a totally different mind frame than normal.  If you need to intervene with pain medication, that doesnt make you a bad person or failure, it makes you a normal human being haha!  In the end you'll have that precious little baby in your arms, and you'll just stare at them, and you won't want to take your eyes off of him/her.  Nothing else in the world will matter and you'll forget the pain immediately!! 

  

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• ericamanuela

  February 2012

  Thank you for the reassurance, I really appreciate you sharing your experience with me. Sorry that you had mastitis. I love german short-haired pointers, they're so gorgeous!

  

  
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• bellelamb member

  February 2012

  I understand how you feel, before my first I was sure it was just a big joke there was no way my body could do that! It did and the epidural was heaven I had no pain at all was still able to push very well and didn't need stitches. Plus once it's over you kind of forget the pain when your holding your child! What No is telling you is the amazing feeling of holding your first child for the first time! It is amazing! I never knew I could love anything that much or be that proud of anything! The pain is so worth it, or why would any of us be having our 2nd or more kids? Don't worry you can do it and you will do great!

  

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