BF/EP Moms - Am I over reacting?

PBP2002 · February 2012

So, tonight my husband says to me, "I have a theory that your breastmilk doesn't have enough fat content and that's why DS is so skinny and hungry all the time." would that upset/annoy you?

Side note, at his two month appointment, DS was greater than 25 percentile for weight and greater than 50 percentile for height (his doctor didn't give the exact percentiles) and was in no way concerned about his size. DS eats every 2-3 hours during the day and 6-8 hours during the night, which sounds about typical for an EBF baby, right?

honeybee #1 · February 2012

a bit PO'd, but I think I would have to admit to myself that I wouldn't have reason to be. And it sounds like your baby is doing just fine.

jnealet · February 2012

Do I need to breal out my pointy shoes and come over there?!? Your lo sounds perfectly fine. Some babies are long and lean, DD1 was and still is. DD2 is a chunker and I can tell you that I'm eating better/less fat now than I was the first time round.

Just like the rest of the population, babies come in all shapes and sizes. It your dr isn't worried tuna there is no reason for your DH to be either.

adri77 · February 2012

He is completely ridic, but yes, that would IRK me!!!

megs68 · February 2012

No, this wouldn't bother me because I say the same thing about my own breastmilk. I joke that my milk must be skim because my kiddos are little.

Twin.Peaks · February 2012

Yes, I would be mad. I would also be hurt. You alone are keeping your baby alive right now so for DH to make you feel like you are failing at your job is not ok. not cool. kick him in the shin.

FWIW...With my twins I EBF and one was a chunker and one was itty bitty. At 2 1/2 they are the same. One is 5lbs heavier then the other. Babies/kids are all built different.

StefB28 · February 2012

DH said something similar to me when I was EBFing DS1 and it REALLY hurt my feelings. DS was under the third percentile but he ate all of the time and my supply was just fine-- I made numerous trips to the LC to weigh DS before and after he ate to make sure he was getting enough milk. My DH actually told me that my insistence on EBFing our son was selfish on my part-- that instead of trying to be "Supermom" I should make sure that DS had enough to eat by giving him a bottle. I eventually gave in because I started feeling like a bad mom... but yep, I was pissed.

honeybee #1 · February 2012

StefB28:
DH said something similar to me when I was EBFing DS1 and it REALLY hurt my feelings. DS was under the third percentile but he ate all of the time and my supply was just fine-- I made numerous trips to the LC to weigh DS before and after he ate to make sure he was getting enough milk. My DH actually told me that my insistence on EBFing our son was selfish on my part-- that instead of trying to be "Supermom" I should make sure that DS had enough to eat by giving him a bottle. I eventually gave in because I started feeling like a bad mom... but yep, I was pissed.

That's just seriously jacka$$ish. I would be pissed at that for a reason.

jkanyugi · February 2012

I would be irked. Dh told me today I should change my diet with less caffeine and chocolate because the baby has been fussy. I was pissed at first too that he was trying to mess with my beloved chocolate (I really don't have a lot of it but it's a nice treat.). Men just don't get that it's a very intimate issue to have our bodies provide what our babies need. Try to explain if you think it will help-if not just try to understand that they are just expressing care for the baby and dont mean any harm.

MrsCaddyshack · February 2012

Yes... that would upset me. But I might use it as an excuse to eat whatever I wanted in front of DH telling him I need to "up the fat content of my milk."

Goodfam11 · February 2012

I know exactly what you mean but on the opposite end. My son is 12 weeks and 17lbs. He is a hoss and my husband goes around joking that we "buy our breast milk at McDonalds." Funny yes but it's also a little hurtful. He also compared my milk to that of a polar bear "fat content wise". While I know he is joking it still hits you in the core. I think breast milk is a sensitive subject like weight. I think we will always be sensitive whenever anyone (ESPECIALLY MEN) get critical or snarky about it.

jenni888 · February 2012

I would be annoyed as well. Even babies who get too much foremilk gain weight just fine. Calories are calories. If you have a healthy baby with healthy eating habits and pedi has no concerns over his growth, it's obviously a non-issue. Every baby has a different body type as well. Some are just chunkier than others and I think by the time they are toddlers it all evens out. Your hubs needs to keep his theories limited to things he can be a subject matter expert on; boob milk clearly not being one of them!

kclear · February 2012

jenni888:
I would be annoyed as well. Even babies who get too much foremilk gain weight just fine. Calories are calories. If you have a healthy baby with healthy eating habits and pedi has no concerns over his growth, it's obviously a non-issue. Every baby has a different body type as well. Some are just chunkier than others and I think by the time they are toddlers it all evens out. Your hubs needs to keep his theories limited to things he can be a subject matter expert on; boob milk clearly not being one of them!

i heart your siggy pic. so effing cute.

SuzJune04 · February 2012

Going 6-8hrs at night sounds like your baby is doing really well and has gotten all he needed during the day! I'd be annoyed too.

My DS was 95% in height and always 15-25% in weight...it worried me but he is just a tall and skinny kid. I wouldn't worry about all those percentages.

b.heather · February 2012

Sounds to me like he needs to go out every night and get your frozen custard to help increase the fat content of your milk! :-)

jenni888 · February 2012

kclear:

jenni888:
I would be annoyed as well. Even babies who get too much foremilk gain weight just fine. Calories are calories. If you have a healthy baby with healthy eating habits and pedi has no concerns over his growth, it's obviously a non-issue. Every baby has a different body type as well. Some are just chunkier than others and I think by the time they are toddlers it all evens out. Your hubs needs to keep his theories limited to things he can be a subject matter expert on; boob milk clearly not being one of them!

i heart your siggy pic. so effing cute.

Thanks! I am trying to do his month pics with Bao Bao Bear to watch the size comparison as DS gets bigger.

Vasana · February 2012

Have you tried looking at the cream of your milk? pop some in the fridge and take a look. And yes I'd be irritated. My son is 35% for weight and 85% for height, I call him string bean, I think your LO is fine.

PBP2002 · February 2012

Thanks everyone for making me feel like I'm not totally BSC. My husband has since apologized. :-)

littlewinnie15 · February 2012

Honestly, I'd tell my DH that until he can whip out his teat and feed the child - he can keeps his opinions to himself. Your LO's pattern sounds totally normal!

amyjoy18 · February 2012

I would be annoyed--but truthfully, most guys have zero clue about how milk production works.

Once with DD DH insisted that she was being fussy because she was hungry and I was out of milk. I got so annoyed that I finally just grabbed my boob and shot him with milk from across the couch.

He got the picture :-)

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