Stay at Home Moms

How would you have handled this situation? (Discipline)

Usually DS is ridiculously well behaved and a simple "Hey Buddy, lets not do that!" works great.

Today he was refusing to wear a coat and I made him. He was extremely upset and was yelling no over and over again. Then when we walked from the store to the car I handed him his book to read in the car. He threw the book into the parking lot!

I firmly said, "No! Ryan, we do not behave that way. We don't throw our books." It was in a firm voice.

He sobbed! I felt SO bad, but I mean, I have to discipline him right?! I know it was the right thing to do (right?) but I'm just so new to the the discipline thing that I feel like I'm scarring him for life or something!

The rest of the trip (10 minutes) he held my hand (my mom was driving, I was in the passenger seat) and I gave him a big hug when we got out and told him I love him.

I guess I just need reassurance that I handled everything okay. What would you have done differently? I feel like such a nerd even asking, I think pregnancy hormones are making me overly emotional.

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Re: How would you have handled this situation? (Discipline)

  • I was just so sad that he cried! SO sad. He will do a short, not-real cry when he gets mad or frustrated but he was actually sobbing! I felt so bad about it. He's only done that a couple of times.

    We've done time-outs before (after repeated attempts at re-direction and telling him no) but it's not like I can give him a time out in a parking lot!

     

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  • I think it was a combination of being a little tired, a little hungry and a little sick- we're dealing with 2 year molars and he's got a stuffy nose.

    DH does not understand why I ever feel bad for having to yell at DS. But DH almost never does because DS's best moods are always in the evening when DH is home! DH says, "It's not bad to discipline him, you shouldn't feel bad." which is WAY easier said than done.

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  • My 2.5 year old bursts into tears if we raise our voices or even sound mildly annoyed (even if I overcompensate for feeling impatient by speaking slowly and carefully--she knows I'm annoyed and that's all it takes). It breaks my heart, and we don't usually need to do that, but it happens. I think you did fine and he'll remember that next time! It doesn't do kids any favors to pretend everyone is all Mary Poppins, all the time :) Learning that people get annoyed when you act a certain way, or that people are cranky sometimes, is part of life. I wouldn't go out of my way to be mean on purpose to teach that lesson, of course, but it's not the worst thing in the world when it happens naturally.
  • He sounds a lot like my DS. If I have to speak to him sternly, he acts like I just told him that I hate him. I would've done the same thing you did.
  • I would have spoken sternly like that as well. My son cries too. It's good that they have that kind of reaction so you have an effective way to immediately correct behavior. Better than if you yelled at him all day long and when you really needed him to listen he didn't, right?
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  • imagekayla&joe:

    I would have spanked him on the butt and told him NO!

     

     

     

    Just kidding, I would have done the same as you except my kid probably wouldn't have cried because he is a hellion.   I think you handled it fine!

    LOL!! I was going to say SPANK that kid... but was only joking.

    Sounds as if you handed it perfectly!!  

  • I think you handled it very well.  He had to be told that his behavior wasn't acceptable.  I have to say that I'm a little jealous, though.  DD is very well behaved a lot of the time, but when I discipline her, she often couldn't care less what I'm saying, even if I'm obviously very frustrated with her.  It sounds like you have a very sweet, sensitive little guy.
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  • You handled the book well, actions have consequences and 

    Depending on where the acting out about the coat took place and how bad it was  I might have done a time out/taken away a privilege or toy. 

    If that isn't normal for him I'd look into if there was a reason (coat getting small, was the house/store warm so he didn't get that outside was cold, etc.) so it can be avoided next time if it has a cause.

    I have a friend whose son rarely wears a coat because he's so hot natured he's miserable if he wears one. We live in the south though so it doesn't get that cold.

     

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  • Thanks for making me feel better! He has a pretty sensitive personality, which I love! Nut I was the same way when I was little and it took pretty much the.smallest thing ever yo hurt my feelings.
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  • I'm not a mom (yet!), but I think you handled it just fine.  Any time my BIL disciplined my nephew when he was little, my nephew would sob as if his little heart was broken.  Even if my BIL just said, "Hey, don't touch the TV, buddy," in a completely normal voice, my nephew was just devastated.  But when my sister disciplined him the same way, no big deal.

    Some kids are more sensitive than others, and I think your discipline should be what's appropriate for your child.  I had a huge attitude when I was a kid, so I got lots of spankings (discipline swats, not abuse).  That was the only way to get the message across to me.  Your little guy obviously got the message that his behavior was unacceptable, and then you reassured him that you love him.  I think you did great.

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