I can't do or buy anything for this pregnancy

HazelEyes730 · January 2012

Without feeling like I'm going to jinx myself and go into PTL. Ugh! I can't even purchase a cute outfit or pick paint colors. Not sure if anyone else feels or felt this way, but I can't get over it. Being rational I know I can't "jinx" this pregnancy by buying things, but I can't stop thinking about it. I was the same way with my 1st PG because it took so long and we did IVF. I thought it'd be different this time, but then we found out we're having twins and all the same feelings are back this time. Sorry about my craziness, I really needed to get that out there. Any thoughts on getting over the anxiety? Thanks.

candasmom · January 2012

I had a previous late loss (22w 4d) so I was afraid to buy anything this time around. I ended up waiting until 28 weeks before I purchased anything, I did some preliminary research online first so that I could order the big stuff like furniture once I hit the 28 week mark. We had plenty of time to get things ready between 28 weeks and when they arrived at 38 weeks 1 day, so if it makes you more comfortable you could just wait a little while longer.

Darcie Elicia · January 2012

Maybe you can celebrate your viability date by buying things? I'm sorry you're feeling this way.

HazelEyes730 · January 2012

I think waiting until 28 weeks is a good plan. I should hopefully feel better about things by then.

Thanks ladies.

Chrissymarie98 · January 2012

HazelEyes730:
I think waiting until 28 weeks is a good plan. I should hopefully feel better about things by then.
Thanks ladies.

I've actually never felt this way. Are you really worried that buying something will jinx your pregnancy?

I'm sorry you're having a tough time. I'm all about enjoying the process and a big part of the process for me is the nesting, decorating, etc.

Of course I haven't bought anything yet because we don't know genders, but once I find that out, it will be a big green light for me.

Chrissymarie98 · January 2012

PS. I just have to say that Kenley is adorable!

HazelEyes730 · January 2012

Chrissymarie98:
HazelEyes730:
I think waiting until 28 weeks is a good plan. I should hopefully feel better about things by then.
Thanks ladies.
I've actually never felt this way. Are you really worried that buying something will jinx your pregnancy?
I'm sorry you're having a tough time. I'm all about enjoying the process and a big part of the process for me is the nesting, decorating, etc.
Of course I haven't bought anything yet because we don't know genders, but once I find that out, it will be a big green light for me.

Oh I know my thinking is completely irrational. I just can't get over these feelings. So setting a date to go ahead and buy things I want and need will make me feel a little better. 28 weeks is a good goal to go by for me.

HazelEyes730 · January 2012

Chrissymarie98:
PS. I just have to say that Kenley is adorable!

Thanks!

Missa_g · January 2012

I'm pretty much the opposite. I'm feeling an extreme urge to nest and I've somehow talked myself into feeling its a good things. I feel like if I hurry up and do it all I'm in for a long wait, which is obviously what I want.

emilyec1 · January 2012

I feel the same way you do. I know that as early on as I am, a lot of moms aren't buying much at this point anyway, but I almost feel superstitious even daydreaming about nursery colors and whatnot. I wish I had some advice, but I hope it does help to know you are not alone in how you feel!

jcath · January 2012

I'm sorry you are feeling this way and I totally understand. I had a previous late loss (17w5d) and was so nervous about being pregnant again at all then when we found out it was twins I was sure we'd never make it. I didn't set up the nursery until about 35 weeks and the girls were born at 37. I didn't buy alot but I did have a couple of showers. It was fine. You don't need everything right away so do what you are comfortable with. But also try to rationalize with yourself to enjoy the moment when you can.

CaliDutchGrl · January 2012

I remember feeling that way!

I bought my major stuff around 25 weeks but I kept everything in the basement with the receipts taped to the boxes. I think we set up most of the stuff around 32 weeks (and by "we" I mean DH) .Luckily, I was able to borrow a ton of stuff from my Sister in laws.

Chrissymarie98 · January 2012

HazelEyes730:
Chrissymarie98:
HazelEyes730:
I think waiting until 28 weeks is a good plan. I should hopefully feel better about things by then.
Thanks ladies.
I've actually never felt this way. Are you really worried that buying something will jinx your pregnancy?
I'm sorry you're having a tough time. I'm all about enjoying the process and a big part of the process for me is the nesting, decorating, etc.
Of course I haven't bought anything yet because we don't know genders, but once I find that out, it will be a big green light for me.
Oh I know my thinking is completely irrational. I just can't get over these feelings. So setting a date to go ahead and buy things I want and need will make me feel a little better. 28 weeks is a good goal to go by for me.

Sounds like a good plan!

Haven1 · January 2012

You're not alone. I purchased the nursery furniture, but I didn't buy anything else. (Maybe I'd have gone shopping for cute girl clothes if that's what I was having though.) It was a mix of being scared and overwhelmed, I think. I remember going to a great consignment sale around 22 weeks and getting nothing but a pair of maternity jeans. It was all too much. Eventually after they came I was able to supplement with a few essential, but it's a great thing we had such generous showers because these boys would have had nothing otherwise.

Rangergal9 · January 2012

I didn't buy anything for these girls until I was about 30-32 weeks along. I was so worried the whole pregnancy! Once I finally started buying stuff I couldn't stop :-)

huntertwin · January 2012

I?m the same way, I'm afraid to buy even maternity clothes. But my fear has nothing to do with superstition or jinxes, it?s just that I'm so terrified that something bad will happen (even though nothing has gone wrong so far) and that I will have to stare at an empty cot and unused onesies in my grief. So I?m waiting until I feel better about their viability.

It?s perfectly rational if you ask me, I'm with you sister

lcbourgeois · January 2012

I just wanted to thank you for creating this post. It's really helped me. I'm going through the same thing. I haven't bought a thing even though I've passed the date of my previous loss...still anxious & worried...

mommyof4boys · January 2012

I had two early losses before the twin pregnancy. I know it's not the same as a late loss and can't compare the two. I went into PTL around 18 weeks with my twin pregnancy. We were afraid to buy anything until we knew they may be able to survive. We waited until 25 weeks and was able to go to BRU. DH pushed me in a wheelchair when we picked out of cribs. A few weeks later around my birthday he pushed me around Kmart and we got a glider. My mom came around my birthday and helped to set the room up with my husband while I cried from the other room.

HazelEyes730 · January 2012

lcbourgeois:
I just wanted to thank you for creating this post. It's really helped me. I'm going through the same thing. I haven't bought a thing even though I've passed the date of my previous loss...still anxious & worried...

I'm glad it's helped. Hopefully we'll both feel comfortable buying all kinds of things soon.

And thanks everyone for the responses. It helps to know I'm not the only one that feels this way.

s270453 · January 2012

Do what makes you feel comfortable, just be ready for anything! I had the perfect pregnancy, till my 28 week appt when I discovered I was contracting (without feeling it) and got put on STRICT bedrest for PTL. If I wouldnt have already had most of my stuff done and bought, not sure what I would have done!!

GeauxTigers82 · February 2012

I too, am just commenting to say how beautiful you daughter is!

I can imagine how you feel, and I think waiting a few more weeks may make you feel better. Like someone else said, you can always "window shop" online, until you're ready to purchase!

HazelEyes730 · February 2012

GeauxTigers82:
I too, am just commenting to say how beautiful you daughter is!

I can imagine how you feel, and I think waiting a few more weeks may make you feel better. Like someone else said, you can always "window shop" online, until you're ready to purchase!

Thanks!

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