For some reason, I feel very passionate about this today, and I'm feeling the urge to vent about it.
I'm sick and tired of people saying that they had to find out if they were having a boy or a girl at their a/s because they're planners. That implies that anybody that is Team Green doesn't plan for their baby. That's just dumb. Just because I'm Team Green doesn't mean I'm not planning. Just be honest, say that you wanted gender specific items for your little one, or even better - you chose to find out because it was the best decision for you and your SO. I have no judgement. I don't care if people choose to find out or not, but don't imply that I'm less prepared for my child because I don't know what's between its legs.
Thank you for reading! I feel so much better.
Re: Ridiculous Vent
Factor V Leiden Homozygous, Advanced Maternal Age
TTC #1, 5 yrs, PCOS, Femera + Ovidrel.
IUI#3 BFP, DD 5/31/2012
TTC #2, 2 yrs, PCOS, Femera+Ovidrel
IUI#2 BFP!
I can definitely see why comments like that would be irritating!
It's everyone's own personal choice. I honestly don't think being a planner or whatever has a lot to do with it, fundamentally. Like, if for some reason you can't tell what you're having, it would imply you'd just leave it until you found out what it was (birth).
I think it takes more strength to be team green these days. I know I was weak (I just wanted to know because I'm nosy)!
claudia poirier
Little Dude: 16 Apr. 2009 | Little Doll: 10 Jun. 2012
Slacker!!!
JK....to that I respond, us 'Team Greeners' are not impatient. And we have the 'Joie de vivre' to enjoy a wonderful surprise when it's supposed to happen......there are generalizations on both sides.
I 100% agree. i am a planner beyond planner in every aspect of my life. But other than clothes and specific nursery colors i can plan completely for this baby just like i plan for everything else. I have all the necessary baby gear, house prepped, etc. When people make that comment to me (and i definely hear it often) it drives me nuts! i was team green for DS and i'm doing it again this pregnancy.
thankfully some of my friends just say "i just wanted to know" or "i was too impatient" etc. i don't care if they find out, but saying that it's because they 'are a planner' drives me insane too!
frozen transfer a success! boy #2 via VBAC
I also find it funny that people find out to "plan". One of my good friends was told she was having a girl right up until her last ultrasound she just had (she's somewhere in the 30 week range) - and they were like - OOPS! Umm...It's a BOY! Sooo, with all that prior planning, she sure was happy she saved her receipts! She had to take everything pink right back to the store!
To each their own, for sure. I am Team Green. As others have said, I like that whatever I will buy will be good for future babies, boy or girl.
I can understand your frustration - but when people say that, I don't think they mean that you AREN'T planning, I think they just mean that they didn't want to wait to find out whether their baby was a boy or girl because they wanted the luxury of buying the gender-specific items beforehand.
I hope you feel better after getting this off your chest, but if I were you I wouldn't take it personally.
Elonah [3], Bentley [1]
I see where you're coming from, but I think it's a perfectly ligitimate reason. Some people plan to have a gender specific nursery (I wouldn't even attempt that once LO is here) and some people plan to have all of the stuf that they may ever need for their baby in pink or blue.
That being said, we found out, because we wanted to know. Plain and simple, the suspense was already killing me at 20 weeks. and FTR we are having a neutral nursery etc in case the next one is a girl.
You are taking it way too personal.
We found out with this one so we knew if we should plan on using DD's clothes or if we needed to buy boy clothes too. If it had been a boy, I would've given him all of DD's nursery decor (safari) and made her room more girly. Now that we know that it's a girl, we can plan for what we want to do in that room.
People tend to like to do things before baby comes instead of having to scramble around after. It's nothing against you, it's just my personal preference to not have to run to Carter's 3 days post partum because there are only so many gender neutral items with ducks on them that one person can stand.
I actually recall giving that reason for finding out and certainly hope I haven't offended my friends who decided to hold out for the surprise. Our nursery will be pretty neutral and most everthing we buy will be too. I honestly felt like I could plan ahead for accessories and clothing and wrap my mind around what the future held a little better. I definitely don't think that those who wait to find out are less prepared, though.
This.
I've used the excuse that I'm too much of a planner to wait. And it's true. I like to plan things out in my head and it's hard for me to think about our LO and picking out things for them without knowing if it was a boy or girl. But I don't think that team greeners are necessarily not planners- so it's not a jab at you when I say I'm too much a planner to wait. I know very well that you can be team green and fully prepared for your baby.
OP, I get this from people ALL the time.I was even venting to my mom about it just this morning!!!
Also, I don't think you're taking it too personally. People are condescending and rude about it to me frequently. It's infuriating!! To me the biggest kink in the plan is the nursery (if you want it to be gender specific like I do), but let's face it...most babies don't use the nursery right away anyway. We're doing our nursery after they arrive.
I don't know....I don't judge anyone's decision to find out so why in hell do they judge my decision not to. It makes no sense...