XP: Paci: Can't go to sleep without it; Can't sleep with it.
I've been trying to sleep train DD for the last 2 nights. The first night, she went to sleep without her paci but eventually, around 5 a.m. the screaming wasn't relenting so I gave in and gave her her paci.
Last night when I put her down for the night, she screamed to the point of gagging and choking and also vomiting a little until I gave her her paci. She just wouldn't stop screaming. At which point she went directly to sleep and I mean immediately. The problem is, nearly every 15 minutes (at the most) she was up screaming because it fell out. I got absolutely NO sleep for the past 2 nights.
How the heck do I get rid of this pacifier? She isn't sleeping and neither am I. I could care less if she used the paci if only it didn't require being replaced every few minutes. This morning between 4 and 7, I replaced her paci 12 times. That's excessive. I don't know what to do. She refuses to sleep without it but she can't sleep with it either. How do I take this from her and still enable her to sleep?
Re: XP: Paci: Can't go to sleep without it; Can't sleep with it.
Sleep training can be tough. No one would ever tell you otherwise. You're right: 12 times between 4 and 7 is excessive. It's not healthy for LO and it's not healthy for you to both be waking up so frequently.
I would make sure your DD is feeling well/not teething/hungry/etc, and then I would just suck it up and sleep train. That can be an unpopular opinion around here, but it's not like your talking about paci pops 2-3 times a night. You're talking many, many times, and as I said before, it just isn't good for either of you.
I think eventually giving your DD her paci is doing more harm than good. All it's teaching her is that if she cries long enough you will give it to her. If you haven't read Ferber's book, I highly recommend it if you're serious about sleep training.
If you follow his suggestions for sleep training, and don't see an improvement within a week, it might be more than a sleep association problem, at which point I would look at some of his other recommendations, or consult your pedi.
Good luck! I hope it all works out for you!
Thanks so much! I have decided that I'm just going to have to suck it up and let her figure out how to get to sleep. I've tried helping her to find her thumb,.fingers, fist, anything to no avail.
I have read Ferber, Baby whisperer and Sleepeasy. I'm going with Sleepeasy right now which seems to be very very close to ferber. I know giving in was totally wrong but I just couldn't take it anymore. Maybe tonight (night 3) will be easier for us both. I hope so.
I know that some people don't agree with sleep training at all let alone any form of cry it out. I struggled for weeks with this decision but LO just has no set sleeping or feeding pattern. I can't book appointments or anything around nap or feeding times because she's so erratic. She'll be 5 months on Friday. I figured it was time.
Thanks for the encouragment. I guess I just needed some reassurance that just taking it from her cold turkey wasn't the worst thing in the world to do.
I couldn't agree more with the PP. It sucks doing it in the short term, but the outcome benefits are life long. I think it may end up being one of the top 3 hardest things you ever have to do as a parent. I also think now, after doing it with our son, that not only was it the right thing to do, but he is a happier baby because of it. He is secure in his ability to put himself to sleep and his disposition and happiness during the day make me confident that it in no way harmed him long term like some people believe. Quite the opposite, I am sure.
We did the CIO for naps only and the results transferred to his night sleep. For me, naps seemed easier and I didn't expect to see the benefits at night.
He had to have his paci too. It would come out during naps and we'd go in and replug it. Once we decided enough was enough, and let him fuss it out, he actually found his thumb and uses that now instead of the paci. He uses his thumb in the middle of the night when he wakes up too. I love the thumb. Thank God for the thumb.
Good luck. It's hard, but just stick with it. I cried a few times myself out in the hallway along with him, and almost caved in SO MANY TIMES. But I stuck it out and am so glad I did.