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I may have a bully...

searcy7searcy7
in Toddlers: 12 - 24 Months
My 14 month old DD has decided over the past few days that she can beat up my 3 year old DD. Any time that I am reading to them or playing with them she bites or pulls her hair and this morning she threw her wooden blocks at her. She broke her sisters nose she was so close and threw so hard. We were all building together and she just threw the blocks without warning. I feel so bad, my 3 year od is miserable and her sister still wants to go at her if DH or I is spending time with her. I know it is a stage but since they are both napping right now and I thought I woud ask if you ladies have any good suggestions to help me. We redirect her when she acts out toward her sister and we spend individual time with each of them.
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Re: I may have a bully...

  • amykins1283amykins1283 member

    This is really difficult because your DD2 is so young but I would probably go with the approach of she loses your attention whenever she acts out this way.  So, if she pulls your DD1's hair or hits her then she gets put somewhere (like a PNP or a room that is gated off), told we don't hit/bite/whatever, and then I would ignore her for a few minutes even if she is screaming.  Keep her where you can see her but just don't give her attention for about 3-5 minutes.  Then go back and talk about nice touching and take her hand and use it to gently touch DD1.  I would also praise her thoroughly any time you catch her treating her sister nicely. 

    I'm normally not for putting them somewhere they can't escape from for a time out but she is so young I think just using a mat or rug or step would be difficult.  I also think that this is attention seeking/jealousy behavior so you need to let her know that she does not get special attention for acting this way.


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  • littlemac1117littlemac1117 member
    Wow, that's rough. I agree with everything amykins said. It sounds like jealous behavior and she needs to learn that it wont get your attention. Reinforcing nice behavior with praise is a good idea. How are they together if you and your H are not right there with them?
    A woman's life is nine parts mess to one part magic, you'll learn that soon enough...and the parts that look like magic turn out to be the messiest of all.
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  • searcy7searcy7

    DD2 does not bother DD1 unless we are giving them attention. Other wise they play together fine. So I think she is jealous of her older sister. I worried that DD1 would be jealous and she never has been but now that it is the other way around it is crazy.

    Thank you for the replies I will try putting her out of reach while we play with DD1 and she acts out.

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