New this was coming...

KtGirl88 · January 2012

I think it was yesterday I posted I knew something was coming because it was too quiet and today I was met by a sheriff at my work. He was really sweet but YEP he served me papers. And ARE YOU KIDDING ME! He is asking for 50/50 PLUS a name change to his last name. He wants all decisions to be approved by him including any extra-curricular activities like dance classes or anything through my church (his family is atheist apparently) I AM FUMING! He wrote that he wants it to alternate every other week as in he wants her for an ENTIRE week and then I will get her the next week!!! I am still nursing her and she has never had a bottle at night and we don't use bottles on my day off. I know these are just things he is requesting but I still cannot believe it. Meeting with my attorney soon to discuss what we will be responding with.

( I'm so scared for her.

DHYGchica3 · January 2012

Deep breaths, I'm pretty sure THEY WON'T take her from you. It's very unlikely he will get the 50/50. He's trying to scare you. Don't let him!

BeachBum1223 · January 2012

Ditto the pp's. When my ex counterclaimed he wanted FULL custody, child support and alimony. He is trying to work you up & get you scared. Your attorney should know what to do.

ChunkyMunkey · January 2012

Try your best not to worry too much. Most men do this just to try to manipulate and scare you. At this age he practically has zero chance of getting what he wants, especially with the history you have told us.

JCGreene85 · January 2012

I can honestly say (and I feel pretty confident) that he will NOT get 50/50. He might get standard EO weekend. Relax, calm down, and do not talk to him when you are all fired up. My EX also requested a name change and that p!ssed me off. All he is doing is shooting high so he has room to wiggle.

sarahanderic2009 · January 2012

"New" this was coming...

"KNEW" this was coming...

Hmm

expectingnothing · January 2012

sarahanderic2009:
"New" this was coming...
"KNEW" this was coming...

Really? Side eye to that in a post where you can see she is completely emotional and very upset right now? I'm positive she knows the difference, she wrote this out in haste. When your world is flipped upside down some day, you can be comforted to know that people will be judging you also.

OP - agree with the others. He's aiming for the stars. He knows he's going to have to negotiate down, he's not going to get all that he wants. Don't talk to him. Go through your attorney. Blow off steam at the gym, talk to friends and family to let it out. And snuggle your daughter and trust that everything WILL be alright.

sarahanderic2009 · January 2012

expectingnothing:
sarahanderic2009:
"New" this was coming...
"KNEW" this was coming...

Really? Side eye to that in a post where you can see she is completely emotional and very upset right now? I'm positive she knows the difference, she wrote this out in haste. When your world is flipped upside down some day, you can be comforted to know that people will be judging you also.
OP - agree with the others. He's aiming for the stars. He knows he's going to have to negotiate down, he's not going to get all that he wants. Don't talk to him. Go through your attorney. Blow off steam at the gym, talk to friends and family to let it out. And snuggle your daughter and trust that everything WILL be alright.

Not judging, just stating the obvious. AND HOW THE do you know if my life hasn't been turned upside down before....JUDGY MCJUDGERTON!

expectingnothing · January 2012

sarahanderic2009:
expectingnothing:
sarahanderic2009:
"New" this was coming...
"KNEW" this was coming...

Really? Side eye to that in a post where you can see she is completely emotional and very upset right now? I'm positive she knows the difference, she wrote this out in haste. When your world is flipped upside down some day, you can be comforted to know that people will be judging you also.
OP - agree with the others. He's aiming for the stars. He knows he's going to have to negotiate down, he's not going to get all that he wants. Don't talk to him. Go through your attorney. Blow off steam at the gym, talk to friends and family to let it out. And snuggle your daughter and trust that everything WILL be alright.
Not judging, just stating the obvious. AND HOW THE do you know if my life hasn't been turned upside down before....JUDGY MCJUDGERTON!

The very first line of her post she wrote 'knew'. Proves that she knows how to spell the word.

I don't know if your life has or has not but according to your bio you are happily married, etc., etc,. and have never posted here before so it's pretty sh!tty to be lurking on the single parents board and then call someone out because they make one spelling error.

sarahanderic2009 · January 2012

expectingnothing:
sarahanderic2009:
expectingnothing:
sarahanderic2009:
"New" this was coming...
"KNEW" this was coming...

Really? Side eye to that in a post where you can see she is completely emotional and very upset right now? I'm positive she knows the difference, she wrote this out in haste. When your world is flipped upside down some day, you can be comforted to know that people will be judging you also.
OP - agree with the others. He's aiming for the stars. He knows he's going to have to negotiate down, he's not going to get all that he wants. Don't talk to him. Go through your attorney. Blow off steam at the gym, talk to friends and family to let it out. And snuggle your daughter and trust that everything WILL be alright.
Not judging, just stating the obvious. AND HOW THE do you know if my life hasn't been turned upside down before....JUDGY MCJUDGERTON!
The very first line of her post she wrote 'knew'. Proves that she knows how to spell the word.
I don't know if your life has or has not but according to your bio you are happily married, etc., etc,. and have never posted here before so it's pretty sh!tty to be lurking on the single parents board and then call someone out because they make one spelling error.

Chick is cray cray. You'll see. Keep your distance from that one.

MaLainey · January 2012

Any custody lawyer worth their salt will tell you to start high. It's like negotiating a deal on a car. He starts high, you start low. Keep documenting the crap out of every stupid thing he does. I'm sorry, I know this is rough. Hang in there.

And I hope you're ignoring the clearly irrelevant "hater" posts. Some people just need to get a life.

covertxxamour · January 2012

Agree with PP's. Don't let him scare you. I was worried about the same thing with my child's father. However, since he ran back to his wife that I had no idea he had, I haven't heard from him because he got a PFA out of me. But, I did talk to my attorney, and here in PA, it's very unlikely for him to get more than 1-2 days a week for only a couple hours a day. And any visits right now would be supervised. It could be different in any state, but the face that you're still nursing is a huge plus for you.

DHYGchica3 · January 2012

sarahanderic2009:

Chick is cray cray. You'll see. Keep your distance from that one.

So it's not "cray cray" on you to come here looking for drama over someone who has not once bothered you?

You are more than welcome to keep your distance, no one is telling YOU to stay.

PeaceLoveYarn · January 2012

KtGirl88:
I think it was yesterday I posted I knew something was coming because it was too quiet and today I was met by a sheriff at my work. He was really sweet but YEP he served me papers. And ARE YOU KIDDING ME! He is asking for 50/50 PLUS a name change to his last name. He wants all decisions to be approved by him including any extra-curricular activities like dance classes or anything through my church (his family is atheist apparently) I AM FUMING! He wrote that he wants it to alternate every other week as in he wants her for an ENTIRE week and then I will get her the next week!!! I am still nursing her and she has never had a bottle at night and we don't use bottles on my day off. I know these are just things he is requesting but I still cannot believe it. Meeting with my attorney soon to discuss what we will be responding with. ( I'm so scared for her.

You probably don't remember me but I was pat of the July FB group too. Anyway I am going through a similar situation so I thought I would give my 2 cents.I would talk to your lawyer about how you can prove that he is "unfit" to have her for over nights. To my knowledge this would require you to petition the court for psych evals, drug tests, and hove visits( where he is currently living and would house her) . Keep in mind that any thing you request you will also have to submit to. This means you would have to take random drug tests, have some one from DCF do a home inspection and go through a psych eval. I have been lurking here since before you left the fb group and saw your post about having to call the police at Barnes and Noble , a report was filed? If yes that will be good for your requests to the court. I live in FL too and unfortunately we live in a very "pro-father" state. We both have ALOT of work ahead of us but I wish you the best of luck

Brett Ivy and Lucas

DHYGchica3 · January 2012

PeaceLoveYarn:
KtGirl88:
I think it was yesterday I posted I knew something was coming because it was too quiet and today I was met by a sheriff at my work. He was really sweet but YEP he served me papers. And ARE YOU KIDDING ME! He is asking for 50/50 PLUS a name change to his last name. He wants all decisions to be approved by him including any extra-curricular activities like dance classes or anything through my church (his family is atheist apparently) I AM FUMING! He wrote that he wants it to alternate every other week as in he wants her for an ENTIRE week and then I will get her the next week!!! I am still nursing her and she has never had a bottle at night and we don't use bottles on my day off. I know these are just things he is requesting but I still cannot believe it. Meeting with my attorney soon to discuss what we will be responding with. ( I'm so scared for her.
You probably don't remember me but I was pat of the July FB group too. Anyway I am going through a similar situation so I thought I would give my 2 cents.I would talk to your lawyer about how you can prove that he is "unfit" to have her for over nights. To my knowledge this would require you to petition the court for psych evals, drug tests, and hove visits( where he is currently living and would house her) . Keep in mind that any thing you request you will also have to submit to. This means you would have to take random drug tests, have some one from DCF do a home inspection and go through a psych eval. I have been lurking here since before you left the fb group and saw your post about having to call the police at Barnes and Noble , a report was filed? If yes that will be good for your requests to the court. I live in FL too and unfortunately we live in a very "pro-father" state. We both have ALOT of work ahead of us but I wish you the best of luck Brett Ivy and Lucas

Brett Ivy you are going through this too :[ I'm so sorry. I remember you from the July group.

Ariana2O11 · January 2012

Be strong. There's no way he can get 50/50 at this point in your daughter's life. She's way too young. A baby, especially a nursing baby, stays with the mom.

I'm nursing my child and my STBXH requested 50/50, but he only got every other weekend where he visits our baby for about 2 hours a day. Then, I take the baby to nurse him and we repeat this the following day until his weekend is over.

KtGirl88 · January 2012

DHYGchica3:
PeaceLoveYarn:
KtGirl88:
I think it was yesterday I posted I knew something was coming because it was too quiet and today I was met by a sheriff at my work. He was really sweet but YEP he served me papers. And ARE YOU KIDDING ME! He is asking for 50/50 PLUS a name change to his last name. He wants all decisions to be approved by him including any extra-curricular activities like dance classes or anything through my church (his family is atheist apparently) I AM FUMING! He wrote that he wants it to alternate every other week as in he wants her for an ENTIRE week and then I will get her the next week!!! I am still nursing her and she has never had a bottle at night and we don't use bottles on my day off. I know these are just things he is requesting but I still cannot believe it. Meeting with my attorney soon to discuss what we will be responding with. ( I'm so scared for her.
You probably don't remember me but I was pat of the July FB group too. Anyway I am going through a similar situation so I thought I would give my 2 cents.I would talk to your lawyer about how you can prove that he is "unfit" to have her for over nights. To my knowledge this would require you to petition the court for psych evals, drug tests, and hove visits( where he is currently living and would house her) . Keep in mind that any thing you request you will also have to submit to. This means you would have to take random drug tests, have some one from DCF do a home inspection and go through a psych eval. I have been lurking here since before you left the fb group and saw your post about having to call the police at Barnes and Noble , a report was filed? If yes that will be good for your requests to the court. I live in FL too and unfortunately we live in a very "pro-father" state. We both have ALOT of work ahead of us but I wish you the best of luck Brett Ivy and Lucas

Brett Ivy you are going through this too :[ I'm so sorry. I remember you from the July group.

Oh wow, of course I remember you! I'm so sorry your are also dealing with this. We will definitely be requesting drug testing and psych evals because one brother that lives in the home is a big drug user (and seller at one point) and the other brother definitely has some very scary psych issues. I hate fl's new laws and all this "shared" stuff but it will all work out eventually I hope. I hope everything is ok with you and baby! I will keep you in my prayers!

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