Is it usualy the mom-to-be's mom that hosts the shower?

NJbaby2012 · January 2012

I think my mom's gonna host but should she ask my MIL out of courtesy?

EastCoastBride · January 2012

No one is required to host a shower - so it can be one of the grandmoms, or a friend, or whoever.

As far as your MIL... I go both ways on this. One way is to just sit back and see if she mentions a shower. If so, then point her to your mom.

At the same time, your mom could tell her that she's planning a shower and wanted to see if MIL wanted to help out. But - this could 1- put her on the spot where she feels she now has to help, and/or 2- open a can of worms around involvement, guest list, etc.

You know your MIL, though. We dont.

NJbaby2012 · January 2012

EastCoastBride:

As far as your MIL... I go both ways on this. One way is to just sit back and see if she mentions a shower. If so, then point her to your mom.

I'm just gonna do this. LOL It seems the least sticky to me.

bride2005!! · January 2012

My mom is hosting but my MIL and SIL have helped out with decorations, favors, etc. My mom is paying for almost all of it though.

rhubarb123 · January 2012

Your only 12 weeks? Maybe wait and see who offers to host. Actually it is not usually the mom-to-be's-mom that hosts although I'd say it turns out that way mabye 1/4-1/3 of the time. You might want to write down what kind of guest list you have in mind...see how many people you come up with. If your mom does decide to host you need to know if she has a limit. If she has no limit and can accomodate everyone on your list (plus some that she would like) then she needs to contact your MIL to let her know she is planning the shower. Your MIL will either say that she plans to have one for your DH's side of the family or she might say she would like to help your mom or she might say..."OK...thanks for letting me know." If it is the 2nd or 3rd scenario then she needs to let your mom know if there are guests she would like to include. It's possible you forgot someone that is important to your DH's family.

ElleJDubs · January 2012

When my brother and his wife were expecting her family threw her a shower and invited only my Brother's immediate family and then my family also threw her a shower for our extended family. Depends how big the families are. Ours are very big so if we tried to combine it would've been huge. I say don't say anything unless she asks, No one is required to throw you a shower it could be a friend, a sibling, a cousin, an aunt. Your MIL might want to throw you one for your hubby's side of the fam!

Is it usualy the mom-to-be's mom that hosts the shower?

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