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TinyPinkBug
member
S/O retirement. Financial support for your parents?
TinyPinkBug
member
Do you and/or your parents expect you to support them financially for their retirement?
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Re: S/O retirement. Financial support for your parents?
I don't have parents anymore, but DH's parents don't expect help financially. We could offer some care if needed. We have promised his parents that my BIL will live with us when they both die since he has pschizophrenia (plan is for an in-law apartment). DHactually just met with them and a lawyer to figure out the financial logistics of that.
My parents have planned well I believe. Even with my dad being laid off from kodak several yrs ago and having to take a lower paying job. My dad is all about having a budget and living within your means. So I am pretty sure they will be ok.
DH's parents have no money and no money saved. They live in a house that will not be healthy for them as they continue to age. I don't know what will happen with them in the future ... DH insists they (and Grand MIL) won't live with us, but I don't see how that won't be a possibility in the future.
ILs definitely no. They are really good about saving for retirement and will both be in a year. They are ensuring they have enough to live comfortably and still go on vacation and visit grandkids etc when they want to.
My mom's scenario is a little different. I'm Chinese so in our culture it is expected that kids take care of their parents when they are older. But my mom is still not expecting us to. But we do all give her money routinely for extra fun money. Like on her birthdays, Christmas, Chinese New Year and whenever we go home to visit if possible we always give her a couple hundred bucks. I wish I could do more but not right now with a baby on the way and house renovations.
My parents have no plan, no savings, little equity and a run down house. I believe my mom thinks she is either going to win the lottery, win big at the casino or have my older sister and I support them. I also think she plans to inherit my great aunt's house and live there. She has told both myself and my older sister that she is going to live with me and my sister is going to pay for it! My sister and I both agree that is a big fat NO. There are so many reasons why I have no desire to support them, mostly because of how she spends money on herself when she could have been paying off debt or saving it instead or even spending it on her own children for things like school clothes. Even now as she and my dad approach 60, she makes under $10 an hour yet has to buy herself things like an iPad, an iPod touch, and goes to the casino at least once a week to gamble. My grandmother does live with my parents, but if anything my grandmother supports them financially. While my other grandmother has been in a nursing home for at least 8 yrs.
My FIL passed away but my MIL is in good physical health, it is her mental health that is more questionable. And unfortunately, she has severe allergies to where she probably could never live in any type of care facility. Even though DH has three other siblings, none of them would ever be willing or able to take her in, so I am pretty sure she will end up with us by default. It is also different because it isn't because she didn't plan or anything. She actually has extended care insurance to cover a nursing home. It sort of is and isn't about money on why we would take one in and not the other. Yes, we would stand to gain financially with MIL, while my parents would cost us an arm and a leg. I guess it is about how willing they have been to help us out, plan for themselves, priorities, and over all how we get along together.