How often are your in laws visiting the lo?

Soon to be Mrs Stephens! · January 2012

My mother in law bless her heart she is a sweet lady and i love her to death. She came to the hospital twice and then was at my house for 3.5 hours the day we came home and came on tuesday and wants to come on Sat. My little one is only a week old. I just want my little one to myself im so stingy I guess. He is loved and Im grateful but when do the visitors stop never huh? Is this a little much or normal lol what whould you do? DH is just like he is loved and he is little and its fine if she wants to be here. My mom went to the hospital once and my house once thats good!

namara5532 · January 2012

This is why we're making a universal policy that, unless they visit in the first couple of days, we don't want them coming to visit for the first few weeks to month. This being our first, we need the time to establish our routine without worrying about entertaining visitors. Maybe it's a bit harsh, but it's why we're saying it applies to everyone. After a month, we'll have to play it by ear as both sets of grandparents want to visit probably more than we actually want them there.

theladyjess · January 2012

My inlaws won't be visiting at all. They live 4 hours away and FIL is in a skilled nursing facility recovering from a really bad infection and receiving occupational and physical therapy as well as going to an outside dialysis center three times a week. We'll most likely go visit them when LO is 6-8 weeks old.

My family will probablly visit but I don't mind that so much. I did tell my friends that if they want to come over in the first few weeks they either have to bring food or do a household chore such as wash the dishes, dust or vacuum. So far all have said they'd bring food.

I'm guessing your MIL is just excited about the new baby. If it's too much for you speak up and say that while you appreciate her excitement over her new grandchild you really need some alone time as a family to get into a routine. If you don't feel comfortable saying something to her have DH do it or let her come over but have her do a chore or something so that you're not entertaining her the entire time. If you need some alone time don't feel guilty for taking LO into your room and closing the door for awhile.

Lhand11 · January 2012

They live 20 mins away and MIL has been here everyday since we got home Tuesday and I have been so grateful! They have been a big help. FIL only comes to drop off food and MIL cleans and holds Liam when we need a break. She is here only when we call and is only is here for a couple of hours. I didn't want her here at first, but they have been amazing.

talitha712 · January 2012

My mom was up for 2 days when E was born and then both the weekends following her birth. DH and I both get along with my mom well and she was a huge help. My in laws have yet to visit, but they live far away. We are flying to see them in March.

lp0 · January 2012

At first MIL was in our face every day but I have since narrowed down her visits to once a week. I simply said to her that while I understand she is excited, we need to get settled and establish our own routine. Unfortunately while my MIL means well, she is one of the most obnoxious and crazy people I have ever met. She was absolutely no help at all when we got home and would park herself on my couch for 8 - 9 hours each visit. She is constantly telling me what to do or how i should do something. Her new thing now is trying to get me to leave the baby alone with her and go out. I've told her numerous times that it's not happening (especially since I'm bf'ing) but she keeps trying. Honestly it's starting to freak me out a bit.

megaloo27 · January 2012

All of our family lives far away so they are coming for a week then leaving. I actually wish they could come more

Cinco · January 2012

My mil visited after we got home. We probably won't see her again until tax season ends, since she lives 5 hours away and is a taxkeeper. We see my parents about once a week though.With 3 I don't turn down the help!

KitKat83 · January 2012

My MIL came the day we got home from the hospital. She stayed 3 days and it was 3 days too much for me. I just had a c section, couldn't move around very well and she made it clear she wasn't there to help so I ended up leaving the second day and staying at my parents where my mom would at least help me. She wouldn't even help with meals or anything. Had a breakdown and made my husband stay with her at our house while I stayed at my own moms (who I am WAY more comfortable with). I was also sick of defending my dog from her. New rule at our house, if you don't like our dog or feel you have to yell at her constantly, then your not welcome to stay with us. This is HER house, not yours. Yeah I had a lot of bitterness after she left. I felt like she ruined our first week with our son, which we'll never get back

baloneydisc · January 2012

My MIL lives in FL, so she can't just "stop by". She hasn't come to see DD yet, we expect her to come for a week sometime in the next couple of months.

textbookcase · January 2012

My ILs live about a half hour away. They've come over a few times, and visited while I was in the hospital. Honestly, though, I don't mind visitors. I have two other kids, so company is welcome!

SoonToBeMsP · January 2012

FIL passed a couple years ago, but MIL came into town when she found out I was in labor. She hung out at the hospital a few hours each day and same with the two days after we got home... She is back home now (a state over) so hasn't been around.

My mom has come by a bunch, but it's been helpful since she brings food and meals for us!

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