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Toddlers: 12 - 24 Months
NicoleWI
member
HELP separation anxiety and sleep (kind of long)
NicoleWI
member
We have had a really rough time w/ DS and sleep. We are never sure if it's teeth, reflux or what, but my latest theory is that he's having a separation anxiety problem. We realized cow's milk was a problem and took him off that, which helped a lot. He still had occasional bad nights, but generally was doing okay. I am the one who always puts him to bed and gets up with him. I'm still BF bedtime and morning (due to all the sleep problems around one year! Was originally going to wean earlier). He had finally started to mostly STTN, waking around 6 and going back to sleep for a couple hours, just before we went on vacation. While we were away, he STTN no problem for 6 nights and then a night or two after we got back. Now, he has started waking up again, and today, I've basically been up since 4 and have to go to work. I usually pick him up, feed him, let him settle, etc. which is not ideal but isn't too bad (back in bed w/in 40 minutes or so). Last night he was wide awake and wouldn't settle down, so I tried leaving him in the crib, coming back frequently to patting him, sing, etc. Kind of a modified CIO (and I hate CIO). He just cried and cried and cried until I finally picked him up. I tried holding his hand, sitting in the room, and finally gave up and held him again. He wouldn't go in our bed, either--freaked out and cried when out of desperation I tried that (3 times). HE won't let anyone else hold him when this is going on. He gets absolutely hysterical if DH tries to help. ANY tips? I don't know what to do. HE seems to be getting worse since we got home, and also, I want to stop BF and can't b/c it's literally the ONLY thing that will work to settle him sometimes. Am starting to wonder if it's the breastmilk that could be part of the problem? Help. His pedi is no help.
Also, we're going to be gone Sat. night and I'm wondering if he will sleep fine when we're gone, but then have even more issues when we get home. 
would still have occasional bad nights where he seemed to b
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Re: HELP separation anxiety and sleep (kind of long)
LO went through separation anxiety at night and acted exactly like your LO. We spent a few nights trying anything and everything and finally we determined that consistency was key. The same person goes in at night. Don't pick him up. Go in periodically (I chose every 5 minutes at first, then 10 minutes, then 15, etc.) and just rub his back, tell him it's OK, and leave.
I did this one night. It was torturous. My DH leaves for work at 2:30am and of course my LO decided to wake up at 3am. It took about an hour for her to get back to sleep and since then, no problems.
I know it sounds cruel. We did Ferber at 11 months because our LO was the worst. sleeper. ever. but it still was really hard to go through that again. But, no one was sleeping, she was chronically tired, and nothing else was working.
Good luck.
I have a blog and it isn't about babies or motherhood or my life. It's just about eating, drinking, and traveling: Explore and Eat