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just need to get this off of my mind!

candi2912candi2912
in C-sections
I just need to vent a little and this seems like the right place to do it, and maybe get a little feedback. I am scheduled to have my 4th c-section on 2/9. My 3 older kids were all by my ex husband. Well now here is what's bothering me. I ended up having my youngest daughter all alone (she is now 5). I had no support at the hospital at all. My ex husband came to see us once in the 4 days we were in the hospital, and stayed for about half an hour, and decided to bring his "friend" with him. Now that I'm getting so close to having my new baby I'm worrying about being alone again! My boyfriend now is great (just to make it clear he is the baby's dad, and we live together for almost 2 years now). But when ever I bring up the c-section and him being there he always kind of jokes about not being there. (though he is a big smartass) but he will say stuff like he will have to play rock-paper-sissors with my dad (who I am super close to, but was not when my other children were born) to see who has to go back with me. And then will throw in that it might even be my son (who is 7) that comes walking in. I know that he is joking, but I have been having nightmares about having the baby and being all alone. I know I'm just over emotional right now but I never thought I was going to be alone with my last child either (she was also a scheduled c-section, and I ended up having to call I cab to go to the hospital because I could not find him or get him to answer his phone). 
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Re: just need to get this off of my mind!

  • TLM08TLM08
    I would just be honest with him. Say "I know you're joking, but I am hormonal and I need to know you're going to be there." If he knew how much it was bothering you he might quit the joking to ease your anxiety. Good luck.
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  • pitterpatter129pitterpatter129 member
    I agree, you should tell him exactly what you just told us. 
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  • ar52kortlangar52kortlang
    He maybe joking to keep his mind off of it and he maybe nervous as well. I will def tell him how you feel, and how it felt when your ex-husband skipped out on you and you dont want to think about that happening this time around.
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  • scuba2011scuba2011
    Be honest with him but also it might help to write up a plan together that includes who will do what and be where. This could be a tool to help facilitate the conversation and it might help him understand all the thought that you are putting into getting ready to have another baby!
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  • candi2912candi2912
    thanks ladies. I have been honest about it,and he knows everything that happened with my ex. But I will talk to him again and let him know how serious it is to me to know he is going to be next to me.
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  • ec3under4ec3under4
    Maybe joking is his way of hiding how nervous he is? He might not have a clue that it's really bothering you! I agree, just tell him exactly how you feel!
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