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Parenting after 35
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Planning for #2?

Watergirl21Watergirl21 member
in Parenting after 35

DD is 19 months old, and I will be 36 in March.  This past weekend we sat down to discuss our budget and plan for this year  and I brought up the idea of having another baby (expecting him to say not yet).   But much too my suprise he said anytime now is fine. 

So now that he said okay- I am not sure what to do.  Normally I am a big planner, and ideally I would like to have a baby in spring/summer of next year, but then I realized that this is ridiculous- because you just never know how long it takes to concieve, and of course there is the possibility of miscarriage or other issues.

So I am just wondering, if there are any good reasons to hold off?   What were the things other people considered when planning for #2. 

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Re: Planning for #2?

  • aglennaglenn member
    For us, we wanted the kids to be somewhat close in age.  We also wanted to do it sooner rather than later due to my age, and to be honest there was a certain degree of "let's get it over with" involved, because I thought it would be worse to wait until DD was older and becoming self-sufficient and then have to start over again.  We talked about our work schedules and when would be a good time to be on leave, knowing of course that you can't really control that...but it did get us to start TTC a little sooner than we might have otherwise.  Financial factors, too, like when we could buy a house, preparing to pay for day care for 2, etc.
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  • Watergirl21Watergirl21 member

    Ya with #1 I felt like there was so much to do- we bought a second vehicle, a house, and all the baby stuff.  This time- there isn't so much prep or expense... we already have the mini van,  the nursery stuff, etc.  If it's a boy- there would be some clothing expenses, but that's about it.

    In terms of leave- I will have a year off, and DD will go to school full time in Sept 2014... so we won't pay for 2 in daycare for too long. 

     

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  • PeskyPesky member
    I just made sure I could swing daycare for both and we wanted to keep them close in age.  Plus didn't know if I would have any issues with 2ndary IF but figured I would rather know sooner than later given I had DD at 35. 


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  • JilliansMomaJilliansMoma member

    I really wanted my kids to be close in age and because of this I felt way more pressure TTC #2 than with #1. With all the issues I had getting PG the first time, we started trying when our oldest was 6 months. When she turned 2 and I still hadn't conceived, my DH and I decided (along with our RE) that IVF was the best way to expand our family. We were able to coordinate the due date close to my DH's last day of school (he's a teacher) so that I would be off on maternity leave while he was on summer break. I think because of my issues I'm always a big promoter of the sooner the better and everything has a way of working out when the baby is here.

    GL in your decision. 


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  • NewMrs07NewMrs07 member
    It took us a year to conceive our son and we've been trying for a few months for #2 and still nothing. So for me, trying to plan for a baby to arrive a certain time is completely useless. I never know when and if I'll get pregnant so I just have to go with the flow. Of course, the day we decide we are done, that's the day I'll get pregnant by accident, lol!
    Me: 44 DH: 42. DS born healthy at 40 weeks 8/24/09. TTC since then with no luck or ART. Surprise BFP 8/6/14... MMC @ 8 weeks 4 days... Miss you everyday sweet baby angel.
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