My MIL wants to "help" when my baby is born in a few weeks. The thing is, I do not want her help. She is a nightmare - demanding and opinionated. EVERYTHING she gives has strings attached - so if she comes help she will expect me to do exactly the way she says. Plus, her help will be staying with the baby while I have to run around the house doing laundry, cooking for 2 extra people (her and FIL), etc. I don't need this.
I want my mom here instead, not my mother in law, but I do not know how to say that without sounding awful. My husband agrees. He sees how helpful my mom has been during this pregnancy and how much his mom has stressed us out.
If MIL finds out my mom is here helping, she will want to come here every weekend. She is competitive and will want to have her "fair share of time" with the baby. The thing is. my mom lives 5 hours away by plane, MIL lives 2h away by car so she will be seeing the baby more anyways, unfortunately. One weekend or two a month is OK for her to visit. Every weekend is NOT.
Any ideas on how to handle this?
1) How to explain nicely I do not need her help when I get back from the hospital?
2) How to avoid the visits that I am SURE will happen every weekend if I don't set boundries?
Thanks girls... maybe I am too hormonal but thinking about that is making me so anxious because she made a scene in every important moment of my life (graduation, wedding, etc) and I do not want her to stain this beautiful moment of my first baby's birth.