Hello, let me introduce myself first..
For the first 30 years of my life, everything was smooth and worry-free. I was my parents’ most beloved child, found my true love in college, and happily married him after graduation.
At work, I was my boss’s most valued employee. Whenever I was in charge of a project, colleagues would inevitably say, “Oh, then I’m totally at ease.” I was constantly named “Employee of the Year,” with generous bonuses every year.
Later, I started my own business. Within just three months, I had broken into the market and started making money. By the fifth month, I was earning twice my previous salary. Growth was steady month after month. Right when the business needed more hands, I serendipitously met an amazing partner, and the company reached a whole new level.
Really, it seemed like at every step, whatever I needed, a pair of hands would always place it right in front of me, just in time.
My Two Girls: Ellie & Mia
Meet Ellie, My Firstborn
In 2020, my husband and I decided to have a child. After trying for over a year, we finally got the news in 2021 that a little one was on the way. In 2022, we welcomed our first child, Ellie. She made me a mother.
She is utterly adorable—big eyes, rosy skin, chubby little hands. Every time I look at her, I can’t help but give her a kiss. She is pure joy, and I love her more each day.
But as a first-time mom, I faced unprecedented difficulties. The postpartum tearing wouldn’t heal, and the pain was excruciating. Clogged milk ducts made my breasts hard as rocks. The severe sleep deprivation… And what was even more crushing was that, with zero parenting experience, I was clueless when faced with her unexplained wailing, night terrors, refusal to nurse, constipation, diarrhea, fevers… I desperately searched online, longing for one accurate, truly useful answer!
It was during this time that I thought, once I make it through this “dark” path, I must leave a light on for other new moms.
And Then Came Mia
Ellie had just turned one when I got pregnant again. In 2024, we welcomed our second daughter, Mia.
Completely different from Ellie, Mia is a great eater and sleeper. Although she had her fussy moments in the first two months, starting almost from month three, she became super easygoing. She feeds on schedule, gradually sleeps through the night, loves her solid foods, and adapted quickly when I had to stop breastfeeding due to mastitis.
This made me realize just how vastly different babies can be! It made me even more determined to write about my experiences.
Why I Had to Start This Blog
The Catalyst: A Life Pivoted
After Mia was born, my business also began to decline sharply. I had no choice but to close it and become a full-time mom. My work no longer involves Excel and Word, but instead revolves around changing diapers, washing bottles, making baby food, and managing household chores…
This has been a monumental challenge for me. All my past achievements seem irrelevant now. Managing two young children has brought me a sense of frustration I’ve never known before.
The Daily Reality
They are always fighting over things. When one is in my arms, the other immediately demands to be held too. When I try to cook, Ellie wants me to read her a book. When I attempt to load the washing machine, Mia has a diaper blowout, and I must drop everything to change her…
By the time I finish all that, I see the cup of hot coffee on the table has gone cold again. And it’s not until evening that I remember, “Oh my goodness, the clothes are still in the hamper, unwashed!”
Of course, being a mom is filled with happiness, but that doesn’t negate how hard it is.
My Promise to You
Because I’ve walked this path myself, I won’t just tell you how joyful motherhood is, like many websites do. I want to share my real, unfiltered experiences so every new mom can find a “companion” here.
I want to tell you: you are not alone. What you’re going through, I’ve been there too. Your breakdowns, your helplessness, your moments of losing control—I’ve had them all. You don’t need to feel guilty. This is just a small, necessary stretch of the journey for every mom.
My Hope for This Space
I really want to share my parenting experiences—not just the warm, glowing moments, but to honestly document the pitfalls I’ve stumbled into, the tears I’ve shed, and the “survival wisdom” I’ve scraped together in utter exhaustion.
The Goal: A Mom’s Toolkit
I hope this blog becomes a “mom’s toolkit,” filled not with vague theories, but with:
- Practical Tips: Like how to quickly figure out why a baby is crying, tried-and-true methods for dealing with clogged ducts, or how to efficiently manage the daily grind with twins (or two under two) solo.
- Pitfall Avoidance Guides: Sharing the baby products I regret buying the most, and those “game-changer” parenting hacks. Letting you know which parenting anxieties you can let go of, and which principles are worth holding onto.
- A Community for Moms: I hope my stories connect me with more moms like you. We can cheer each other on in the comments, share our own tricks, turning the storms we face alone into a journey we walk together.
The Bigger Vision
My previous career taught me to analyze data, solve problems, and optimize processes. Now, I’m applying all those skills to this new “position” of Mom. I want to prove that a mom’s value is absolutely not confined to the home. The mindset, resilience, and creativity we built in our careers can shine just as brightly—perhaps even brighter—in this more complex, long-term “project” of raising humans, and can even be transformed into a force that helps others.
My hope is simple: that every mom who opens this blog can let out a sigh of relief and say, “So it’s not just me.” Then, she can find a bit of practical info, a dose of comforting solidarity, and return to her sweet, chaotic mom-life with a little more confidence and a little less weight on her shoulders.
This road? Let’s walk it together.
butterflygrooves
member
Re: Poll: Hold on or let go?
i said let go ... especially since DOS BABIES arrived we have crap M is a crafter so we have stuff LOTS OF stuff .. I LIKE TO THROW AWAY ...somethings are worth keeping but most i like to toss...
Sadly, the girls are 6 mo and I am ready to pass on their newborn stuff M is horrified ... i will keep some outfitts that were super meaningful but her mind set is what about another baby ...
uggg...
- J
our Blog -http://dosbabies.wordpress.com/
I tried to answer this last night, but then the bump went down. Grr.
Anyway, we just did some MAJOR rearranging of our house so that each baby could have their own bedroom. This also meant tht alot of our storage areas will be No longer. We wet thru and got rid of 2 outside garbage cans full of stuff and 2 FULL car loads to Goodwill.
If I hadn't used it in 6-12 months or didn't think I would use it in the next couple months--it was out. I say let it go. Some stuff we got rid of was totally garage-sale-able but storing it until garage sale time seemed overwhelming. Goodwill by our house got some nice stuff.
IVF Oct/Nov 2012
Beta #1 = 77, Beta #2 = 190, Beta #3 = 1044
Cautiously optimistic.
I didn't vote, probably because I know I should vote "hold on," but I can't admit it
I do hold on to sentimental stuff - as I mentioned several times on here, I just went through all of my paperwork and reorganized it. I got rid of TONS of stuff like old bank statements and the like, but I kept all of the cards, things I'd chosen to save from school (elementary through law school!), tickets and maps from our trips, etc. I got it down to four file boxes and one small cardboard box of cards, and I was pretty proud of that - but I know a lot of people would think that's an insane amount of purely sentimental, non-useful paperwork to keep.
We do regular sweeps of the house to donate to Goodwill, and I'm gradually getting over the need to keep "stuff that might be useful someday," including clothes, kitchen gadgets, electronics, etc. My dad's side of the family has the tendency to collect and keep way too much stuff. My brother and sister are pretty much minimalists because of it, but I have to work harder at it. Fortunately we have always lived in small apartments without much storage space, which helps a lot.
I said, "I'm special." I LOVE purging and letting go of most things. However I still have all my photos, friendship notes, and special toys from childhood. It is all boxed up and stored but there is probably some of it that I should let go of. Both K and I regularly put together bags of stuff for the Goodwill. We have a house rule that if we bring something new in the house, something old of the same type has to leave (new shoes in, old shoes out).
Speaking of old paperwork...
When we moved 7+ years ago, L went through her office and found bank statements, bills for car insurance, credit card statements, etc from 1988-2004. I spent a week shredding the paperwork and made her promise to never to keep that stuff again.
Thankfully, with the internet and being able to pull statements, she has kept her word.