Hello, let me introduce myself first..
For the first 30 years of my life, everything was smooth and worry-free. I was my parents’ most beloved child, found my true love in college, and happily married him after graduation.
At work, I was my boss’s most valued employee. Whenever I was in charge of a project, colleagues would inevitably say, “Oh, then I’m totally at ease.” I was constantly named “Employee of the Year,” with generous bonuses every year.
Later, I started my own business. Within just three months, I had broken into the market and started making money. By the fifth month, I was earning twice my previous salary. Growth was steady month after month. Right when the business needed more hands, I serendipitously met an amazing partner, and the company reached a whole new level.
Really, it seemed like at every step, whatever I needed, a pair of hands would always place it right in front of me, just in time.
My Two Girls: Ellie & Mia
Meet Ellie, My Firstborn
In 2020, my husband and I decided to have a child. After trying for over a year, we finally got the news in 2021 that a little one was on the way. In 2022, we welcomed our first child, Ellie. She made me a mother.
She is utterly adorable—big eyes, rosy skin, chubby little hands. Every time I look at her, I can’t help but give her a kiss. She is pure joy, and I love her more each day.
But as a first-time mom, I faced unprecedented difficulties. The postpartum tearing wouldn’t heal, and the pain was excruciating. Clogged milk ducts made my breasts hard as rocks. The severe sleep deprivation… And what was even more crushing was that, with zero parenting experience, I was clueless when faced with her unexplained wailing, night terrors, refusal to nurse, constipation, diarrhea, fevers… I desperately searched online, longing for one accurate, truly useful answer!
It was during this time that I thought, once I make it through this “dark” path, I must leave a light on for other new moms.
And Then Came Mia
Ellie had just turned one when I got pregnant again. In 2024, we welcomed our second daughter, Mia.
Completely different from Ellie, Mia is a great eater and sleeper. Although she had her fussy moments in the first two months, starting almost from month three, she became super easygoing. She feeds on schedule, gradually sleeps through the night, loves her solid foods, and adapted quickly when I had to stop breastfeeding due to mastitis.
This made me realize just how vastly different babies can be! It made me even more determined to write about my experiences.
Why I Had to Start This Blog
The Catalyst: A Life Pivoted
After Mia was born, my business also began to decline sharply. I had no choice but to close it and become a full-time mom. My work no longer involves Excel and Word, but instead revolves around changing diapers, washing bottles, making baby food, and managing household chores…
This has been a monumental challenge for me. All my past achievements seem irrelevant now. Managing two young children has brought me a sense of frustration I’ve never known before.
The Daily Reality
They are always fighting over things. When one is in my arms, the other immediately demands to be held too. When I try to cook, Ellie wants me to read her a book. When I attempt to load the washing machine, Mia has a diaper blowout, and I must drop everything to change her…
By the time I finish all that, I see the cup of hot coffee on the table has gone cold again. And it’s not until evening that I remember, “Oh my goodness, the clothes are still in the hamper, unwashed!”
Of course, being a mom is filled with happiness, but that doesn’t negate how hard it is.
My Promise to You
Because I’ve walked this path myself, I won’t just tell you how joyful motherhood is, like many websites do. I want to share my real, unfiltered experiences so every new mom can find a “companion” here.
I want to tell you: you are not alone. What you’re going through, I’ve been there too. Your breakdowns, your helplessness, your moments of losing control—I’ve had them all. You don’t need to feel guilty. This is just a small, necessary stretch of the journey for every mom.
My Hope for This Space
I really want to share my parenting experiences—not just the warm, glowing moments, but to honestly document the pitfalls I’ve stumbled into, the tears I’ve shed, and the “survival wisdom” I’ve scraped together in utter exhaustion.
The Goal: A Mom’s Toolkit
I hope this blog becomes a “mom’s toolkit,” filled not with vague theories, but with:
- Practical Tips: Like how to quickly figure out why a baby is crying, tried-and-true methods for dealing with clogged ducts, or how to efficiently manage the daily grind with twins (or two under two) solo.
- Pitfall Avoidance Guides: Sharing the baby products I regret buying the most, and those “game-changer” parenting hacks. Letting you know which parenting anxieties you can let go of, and which principles are worth holding onto.
- A Community for Moms: I hope my stories connect me with more moms like you. We can cheer each other on in the comments, share our own tricks, turning the storms we face alone into a journey we walk together.
The Bigger Vision
My previous career taught me to analyze data, solve problems, and optimize processes. Now, I’m applying all those skills to this new “position” of Mom. I want to prove that a mom’s value is absolutely not confined to the home. The mindset, resilience, and creativity we built in our careers can shine just as brightly—perhaps even brighter—in this more complex, long-term “project” of raising humans, and can even be transformed into a force that helps others.
My hope is simple: that every mom who opens this blog can let out a sigh of relief and say, “So it’s not just me.” Then, she can find a bit of practical info, a dose of comforting solidarity, and return to her sweet, chaotic mom-life with a little more confidence and a little less weight on her shoulders.
This road? Let’s walk it together.
Re: Does your preschooler drink caffeine?
No. And while I would not get too bent out of shape over it, I would definitely say something to my grandparents about it. Let them know that apple juice and milk are both options.
DD -- 5YO
DS -- 3YO
Wellll... my 16 yr old doesn't drink caffeine, my DH and I don't drink caffeine so needless to say neither do my little guys.
I honestly think it's a generational thing with some grandparents. My mother sustains life on Coke and I was raised drinking Coke with every meal.
My Mom laughs when I frame colas and caffeine as an addictive "drug" and says I'm being melodramatic and up tight about it. When she visits we call her soda "Grandma juice".
I personally would make it clear that she doesn't get any next time but like PP's said offer up alternatives so Grandma can still feel like she gets to "treat" her to something special if that's her issue with it.
I'm pretty flexible when it comes to Grandma spoiling them. Heck... she fed my brother's kids nothing but bacon one time for dinner. Normally my motto is "as long as they're alive at the end of the visit be thankful that you've got someone giving you free baby sitting and loving on your kid." but caffeine would be one I'd have a conversation about for sure.
Total score: 6 pregnancies, 5 losses, 2 amazing blessings that I'm thankful for every single day.
Nope. They are spaz enough w/o chemical stimulants
They have had a rare sip of sprite but otherwise we avoid all sodas. I'm a Coke (cola that is) addict and I blame part of it on the fact my mom gave it to me from birth. We really want to teach the joys of water (and I'm learning them slowly with the kids).
When the kids do go out with family I've made it very clear that they get milk, choco milk, or apple juice at restaurants. That is what I consider an appropriate treat drink for a special occasion.
"When it comes to sleeping, whatever your baby does is normal. If one thing has damaged parents enjoyment of their babies, it's rigid expectations about how and when the baby should sleep." ~ James McKenna, Ph.D., Mother Baby Behavioral Sleep Center, University of Notre Dame
My girls don't drink soda. I try to stay away from it myself. I would tell her so she knows next time that she normally doesn't drink it & you would prefer her to have X instead.
Nope. We don't do soda in our house (neither me nor DH likes it, so we don't buy or serve it). They consider plain seltzer with a splash of 100% juice the biggest treat in the world, so I'm not offering anything different. DH was raised being allowed soda every night at dinner and his Dad is now fighting diabetes. I was raised with soda as a once in a very rare while treat. We've both agreed that drinking soda daily is unnecessary and unhealthy, so we all avoid it and once we cut it out of DHs diet he lost his taste for it entirely.
I probably wouldn't get bent out of shape if my mom let them have a sip here or there, but there's no reason for such a little kid to have an entire soda.
She's had a few sips of coke and iced tea and likes to have some of my coffee on teh weekends (and I've let her have sips of beer and wine too when she asked/seemed curious), but I'd never get her her own caffeinated soda. I feel like I stick otu like a sore thumb when I let her get chocolate milk!
We went to a neighborhood picnic when I was PG w/ DD and the couple next to us got their 3 or 4 yo her own diet coke; I'm still recovering from the shock of that.
On the other hand, I thought it was a little funny/silly that my ILs got all pearl-clutchy when I mentioned to their 12 yo that I had coke and sprite at a family party - meanwhile their kid guzzles Gatorade/Sports drinks 24/7.
We don't do any caffeine for the kids, just water and milk and watered down juice once in a while. When we are out to eat DS1 is only allowed to get water, because I'm cheap. If it's a special occasion he can get a lemonade.
My main reason for not even letting him *taste* it is because I don't want to have to deal with the incessant NAGGING that will ensue if he likes it. If by the time he does get to try it, he doesn't like it, that will be an added bonus.
I don't think anything of people who share sips or whatever, but my cousin literally orders her son (same as as DS1, 3 yrs) soda when they go out to eat, which is quite often. And I do tell her that it's really not a good idea, and it reaffirms my belief to not give my kids any.
No, and we've never had a relative offer it to DS. If they did I would decline it or tell them to give him milk/juice/water next time. DH and I only keep tea, juice, and Gatorade in the house, and DS thinks it's a treat to get watered down Gatorade. The only time we have pop is when one of us has a headache.
MIL made kool aid at Thanksgiving. I don't know why but it really bothered me to have DS drinking it. Maybe b/c it's just sugar (even the juice we keep at home at least has calcium) and he has enamel issues to begin with. I let him have 1 glass and then made him drink water the rest of the weekend.
DS is active enough as it is...I would hate to see him on caffeine. I picture the Tasmanian Devil.
I would probably say something about an entire glass. I think some people truly don't think of caffeine as being a drug. That being said...DH and I both drink soda. I hated it as a kid though...I never drank it until I hit college.
Cam 6.6.10 - Autism, Global Developmental Delay, Mixed Receptive/Expressive Communication Disorder
I'd make it clear that you don't want her having any. DS1 is 5 and we wont allow him to have soda or caffeinated drinks. DH is a "health nut" and I just don't see any reason why kids should be drinking it. There are other options (water,milk, juice?) at those places so I'd just tell them what they can have and let them pick from those.
Our Family Blog Weightloss Blog
No.
DD doesnt like pop. and if she did or was willing to try some, it would sprite or something without caffeine in it.
TTC #2 since June '08
~*DD 10.21.07*~
dx unexplained
IUI #1-4 BFN
IVF#1 June 2011 BFN
IVF#2 Dec 2011
Beta#1 12/21 : 812 Beta#2 12/23 : 1634
EDD 8/25
*PAIFW/SAIFW*