Can I tell you about the baby shower last night?

roxyttandme · January 2012

A handful of things happened...

1.) We went with our dear friends who announced they are pg last weekend- which we are THRILLED for them!

2.) Another couple there announced their 4 week pg to the group. :::insert roll eye::: At one point in the evening I was surrounded by 3 pg ladies! :::breathe, just breathe:::

3.) Found out our ex-friends (due to them telling me that DH and I lost Haleigh so we could build some character!) :::insert Freddy Krueger and die, b!tch!) was recently pg and lost the baby. I don't know how far along she was - but it broke my heart none the less. I guess she also reached our to my DH via fb saying that we should get together. I guess now she wants support? This is going to be fun!

4.) Friend we haven't seen in 4 years was there. When I saw him, we hugged, asked each other how we were, he asked how our dogs are, etc. About an hour later and at the dinner table with 5 other people, he looks across at DH and I and asks: "so, where are your children?". (I think in my mind, in a box at home) DH and I look at each other, I turn to Captain Douchbag and shake my head with sorrow in my eyes. He meets my eyes and says: "What?" DH steps in and says, we had a still born. He says: "Oh, I am so sorry to hear that.... (then looks at me and says) but, you said the dogs are ok!"

I slap the table and REALLY loud yell: "Well, hot damn! That makes it ok then!" I get up and walk away...

I hate people.

As if our dogs trump our daughter.....

melly918 · January 2012

1) awesome!

2) yep, way too early. These early BFPs annoy me too.

3) oh, wow. That will be interesting if you do get together.

4) douchebag for sure!!!

VikingQueen · January 2012

ugh some people.. ((hugs)) Good for you for saying something back and getting up and walking away.

delino · January 2012

Holy crud! I applaud you on how you handled yourself. (((HUGS)))

katharine25 · January 2012

1. Congratulations to your friends, but mostly I'm so happy you're genuinely thrilled by it - shows major growth on your part, so mostly, congrats to you!

2. Insert eyerolll

3. Karma is a b!tch, huh? I would tell her straight out - you've got to give some to get some

4. ...speechless... f7cking idiot

So, are you glad it was at least a drinking baby shower?

roxyttandme · January 2012

katharine25:
1. Congratulations to your friends, but mostly I'm so happy you're genuinely thrilled by it - shows major growth on your part, so mostly, congrats to you!
2. Insert eyerolll
3. Karma is a b!tch, huh? I would tell her straight out - you've got to give some to get some
4. ...speechless... f7cking idiot

So, are you glad it was at least a drinking baby shower?
Thanks hun... and no, I didn't feel comfortable drinking with testing in now 2 days.... I was 100% sober.

JellyTwoPointO · January 2012

Woooowwww...... sounds like an eventful evening full of some good stuff, ok stuff, and really sh!tty stuff. I'm so sorry about that last part. I would've smacked him. Not even kidding. ((hugs))

maxsom · January 2012

**hugs**

Irishsapphire · January 2012

roxyttandme:

A handful of things happened...

1.) We went with our dear friends who announced they are pg last weekend- which we are THRILLED for them! . . . Yeah for them!

2.) Another couple there announced their 4 week pg to the group. :::insert roll eye::: At one point in the evening I was surrounded by 3 pg ladies! :::breathe, just breathe:::. .. Yep, just breathe, it is still early and a lot of things can happen in a pregnancy--I know everyone on here gets really excited, even at 4 weeks pregnant.

3.) Found out our ex-friends (due to them telling me that DH and I lost Haleigh so we could build some character!) :::insert Freddy Krueger and die, b!tch!) was recently pg and lost the baby. I don't know how far along she was - but it broke my heart none the less. I guess she also reached our to my DH via fb saying that we should get together. I guess now she wants support? This is going to be fun! . . . They were clueless about what it is like to lose a baby. Now that they are going through a loss, it is your choice if you want to get together with them. Sometimes, you have to be the friend who sets a better example about how to handle a loss and that it is hard when people tell you things and expect you to just get over it--that it does take time to heal--and that they are human if they are grieving at this point.

4.) Friend we haven't seen in 4 years was there. When I saw him, we hugged, asked each other how we were, he asked how our dogs are, etc. About an hour later and at the dinner table with 5 other people, he looks across at DH and I and asks: "so, where are your children?". (I think in my mind, in a box at home) DH and I look at each other, I turn to Captain Douchbag and shake my head with sorrow in my eyes. He meets my eyes and says: "What?" DH steps in and says, we had a still born. He says: "Oh, I am so sorry to hear that.... (then looks at me and says) but, you said the dogs are ok!" . .. Again they are clueless and just throwing out talk.

I slap the table and REALLY loud yell: "Well, hot damn! That makes it ok then!" I get up and walk away...

I hate people. ----Got to love friends--they are human. These situations only let us know which friends are better and healthier for us.

As if our dogs trump our daughter..... Your daughter is a beautiful baby who deserves to be acknowledged.

I am sure it was difficult for you to be at the baby shower to begin with. Take care of yourself.

mork · January 2012

*HUGS*

angielayne926 · January 2012

So sorry you had to deal with all of the stupidty! (((HUGS))) to you!

besoul · January 2012

1. YAY!

2. Boo. Who announces that they are 4 weeks pregnant during someone else's shower?! Lame.

3. (((HUGS)))

4. That guy sucks.

foxxy1 · January 2012

Number 4 makes my skin crawl.

lex382 · January 2012

besoul:

1. YAY!

2. Boo. Who announces that they are 4 weeks pregnant during someone else's shower?! Lame.

3. (((HUGS)))

4. That guy sucks.

All this. That guy is an a$$ and obviously had no clue what to say (although you would think I am so sorry for your loss would be something that came to mind right away). ((huge hugs)) hopefully there is good news coming your way soon

jinxycat24 · January 2012

Oh my goodness....what an evening. I can't understand some of the things people do and say but good for you for saying something to that guy. People need to learn to think before they speak!

newly_naugler · January 2012

katharine25:
1. Congratulations to your friends, but mostly I'm so happy you're genuinely thrilled by it - shows major growth on your part, so mostly, congrats to you!
2. Insert eyerolll
3. Karma is a b!tch, huh? I would tell her straight out - you've got to give some to get some
4. ...speechless... f7cking idiot

So, are you glad it was at least a drinking baby shower?

Very well put. My thoughts exactly.

[Deleted User] · January 2012

1. I'm glad you are thrilled for your friends! YAY!

2. ::rolls eyes also:: Yeah, early pg announcements bug me too. It's way to early to be sharing with friends!

3.I won't pull the "karma" card (although we're all thinking it) but I think that if you lend her some support you will be a bigger person than me, I would have held that against her for sure. But I hold grudges.

4. WOW, what a douchecanoe! I was hoping you were gonna say you slapped him, but alas, you're reaction was still appropriate! And I loved it!

((HUGE HUGS)) you made it through...

SunnyCanadian · January 2012

((HUGE HUGS))

Wow to #4 - BIG FAIL BUDDY! I'm not a violent person but I'm sure I'd throw a throat punch across that table!

I am so sorry you had to go through all of that at one baby shower! But hun, you handled it with so much grace you should be sooo proud of yourself! I know I am

VineyardMel · January 2012

(((Big Hugs))) What a night. So glad you stood up for yourself!!

ktsnshn · January 2012

((Huge Hugs!))

PittPurple · January 2012

I'm so sorry about 4, what an a$$. seriously, who says that? I think you reacted perfectly and I really hope he thinks twice before opening his mouth in future.

I'm so glad that you're happy for your friends :-)

For 3 - She's part of our board irl now, whatever happened in the past. I still cannot believe what she said to you, but obviously she'd never been through something so painful and I'm sure now her perspective has changed. But wow, what a thing to say to you (((hugs)))

It's something I wonder about sometimes - I think I'm an entirely different person now than I was 6 months ago. I'll always wonder if I said something to someone in the past without even thinking - so many people have said such thoughtless things to me, I wonder if you really do have to go through something like this to have anything reasonable to say.

MissNYC1987 · January 2012

melly918:

1) awesome!

2) yep, way too early. These early BFPs annoy me too.

3) oh, wow. That will be interesting if you do get together.

4) douchebag for sure!!!

This exactly! Yes

Mel_B09 · January 2012

I truly think some people are stupid and cannot just say sorry and always have to add something else. I would have freaked right out on him..

amandachs · January 2012

Holy hell... #4 has me at Indifferent

and

and

. What an a$$. I'm very proud of you for asserting yourself, I'd have lost it on him. Many ((((Hugs))))

ToiKenne · January 2012

Wow. After reading that, I am disgusted and appalled. WTF is wrong with people?!?!

FWIW, you just made my mind up for me about my SIL's baby shower which in March which I will apparently be invited to.

Ax2 · January 2012

PittPurple:
It's something I wonder about sometimes - I think I'm an entirely different person now than I was 6 months ago. I'll always wonder if I said something to someone in the past without even thinking - so many people have said such thoughtless things to me, I wonder if you really do have to go through something like this to have anything reasonable to say.

This. I think about this often.

And I'm late to the party, but I'm sorry the baby shower was such an exercise in patience for you. People really can be clueless and/or douchecanoes.

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