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June 2012 Moms
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Somewhat baby-related vent

ZilelabelleZilelabelle member
in June 2012 Moms

Sigh. I can't really talk to RL people about this and it's stressing me, so I'm bringing it here. This weekend has been very hard so far. Backstory:

2 weeks ago DH and I just bought a business I have worked at for 11 years. During those 11 years I became very close to the people I've know since the beginning. One of them is a really sweet lady that is an artist, cat lover and very generous person. Unfortunately she also suffers from depression which leads her to call out of work once or twice a week. She didn't used to be so bad, it happened gradually and we all covered for her as much as possible, letting her spend a few hours in the basement crying while we were working essentially for 2 people and not telling on her, because we knew she needed the money. The previous owners didn't know about the fact that she didn't work much while she was there, but they did know about her calling in every week which kept getting worse. But since they were also nice people they kept covering her shifts and not saying anything.

Now that DH and I own the place, I know all about how she used to be and how, while we still like her as a person, we are all tired of covering for her, working double shifts and coming in on our days off. Now no one will work for her, so DH and I have to. Being pregnant and not having a day off in over 2 weeks is starting to get to me and today when she called in for the second day in a row, it was pretty much the last straw, so after a meeting with DH and the Manager, since I was the only one with the balls to do it,  I had to give her a two weeks notice.

I told her that since I'm going to have a baby soon, we can't afford to have an unreliable employee working for us. I mean, what would we do if I went into labor and she got one of her 'headaches'? My husband would have to miss the birth of his child or close whichever store she was in. Also, after the birth for 2 months I'm going to be completely gone and he's going to need to be able to rely on everyone there. We really are barely handling it together now. I was so unhappy to be doing it that I actually cried while I was telling her and am still pretty upset.

I feel like I just kicked a puppy into a mud-puddle. But I did it. Soon I will be able to take a day off and concentrate on keeping myself and my baby healthy. This is my mantra. It really had to be done though, right? I could really use some validation here, so if you do think I did something horrible just now, please be kind and don't tell me. I know that what I did was really hurtful and potentially damaging to an unstable person, but I feel like I didn't have a choice.

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Re: Somewhat baby-related vent

  • celestialnytecelestialnyte member

    20000000% you did the right thing. I understand when people have mental health challenges, but if they are bad enough to needing to be calling out that much, then she needs to go on disability or something. If you're employed, you need to be reliable. Don't feel bad. You may have been the person that makes her go seek help.

    Yes Enjoy the rest of your weekend knowing you made the right choice for you, your family and your business. Chances are, if she decides to work through her 2 weeks, she'll be a b!tch to you and YH, and maybe other employees, but from the sounds of it, she's probably either going to call out most of the rest of her days or just decide to not show back up.

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  • ZilelabelleZilelabelle member
    imagecelestialnyte:

    Enjoy the rest of your weekend knowing you made the right choice for you, your family and your business. Chances are, if she decides to work through her 2 weeks, she'll be a b!tch to you and YH, and maybe other employees, but from the sounds of it, she's probably either going to call out most of the rest of her days or just decide to not show back up. 

    Thank you. And I have a feeling you are right about this part.

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  • InLove621InLove621

    I'm so sorry you had to do that! I worked for a mom and pop shop for 4 years and they do become like family. But you have to do what's right for your business especially when you won't be able to help once you get closer to your due date. 

    Plus you don't need to stress or worry once baby gets here about the business and if she's pulling her share. It sucks, but you definitely did the right thing as much as it hurts.

     

     

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  • mattnrachelmattnrachel member
    I applaud you for doing the right thing.  The truth is that you, other employees and the business have been suffering for sometime.  You are not responsible for her behavior and should not feel guilty.
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  • IwasjustsayinghiIwasjustsayinghi

    Lurker here - but wanted to throw in my two cents.

     I think you definitely did the right thing. I've suffered from depression as well, and she's not going to get better by doing nothing. Maybe this will be the thing that pushes her to finally get some help. You can't "think yourself healthy" from true depression, and she really needs to go see a doctor. Though it sucks that she's having to lose her job, you have to do what's best for you and your baby. Hopefully it'll help her finally do what's best for her too. 

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  • Davesgrl2011Davesgrl2011 member
    Sounds like she was taking advantage of you.  Why should she come to work when she can choose not to and get away with it?  I'd love to decide when to work and when to stay at home and sleep.  You did the right thing. 
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