- Pregnancy
- Baby & Toddler
- Parents
- Getting Pregnant
- Baby Names
- Product Reviews
-
Registry
- Community
-
More
Want a personalized experience?
Download the free app
1st Trimester
workingmama
member
We love you baby - m/c - 09/10/2011
Pregnancy Reveal (to parents) advice needed
workingmama
member
Scan down to the bold if you don't want the background.
Let me start by saying I am unsure (and a little nervous) about how my parents are going to react to our pregnancy news. When we told them - way too early - about the last pregnancy, they were hardly interested. I was also shocked at how little support I received from them during and after the loss. I think they just did not know what to do or say, but they were not there for me like they have been at every other moment in my life.
I should also note that I do not expect a reaction like the one they had when we told them about our pregnancy with DS. He was the first grandchild and they did not know we were TTC, etc. I wish it would be so enthusiastic, but I know it won't be.
Okay - so. Here is the question. We saw the hb yesterday (yeah!) and are ready to tell them from a timeline perspective. BUT, my mom and I are in a ladies' group together and they do a special ceremony for women to announce pregnancy to the group. I am tempted to wait until the next meeting (in February) and announce it that way and have my mom be stunned. Here is what I am unsure of: 1) If she will be miffed I announce to her at the same time as I tell the rest of the group; 2) if we should tell both of my parents at the same time.
Thoughts?
ETA: added "needed" to the subject of the post
We love you baby - m/c - 09/10/2011
This discussion has been closed.
Re: Pregnancy Reveal (to parents) advice needed
Maybe I should explain better if it sounds like I am considering doing the group announce for a bad reason...
I had to nominate my mom for the group and it was a long process to get her in. It means the world to her to be a part of it. My announcement would be the only ceremony she would ever have a personal connection to - most of the women in the group have experienced several announcement with personal meaning to them.
It would not be a way to try to get out of telling her privately. Rather, a hope of a really big surprise for her around her friends. Do I hope the element of surprise and group-think makes her more excited? Sure, but that is not the driving force for it. I hope that makes more sense.
We love you baby - m/c - 09/10/2011
After reading this, it may be like a nice surprise for her. Especially if you are all so close to the other ladies. Maybe you can buy her a little something as well just so she doesn't feel like she was not special by finding out this way??
Carter Robert 7.18.08 | Brynn Sophia 5.24.10 | Reid Joseph 9.10.12 | Emerson Mae 1.27.14
I can't get the ticker to work, but I have two sons:
Baby RJ, born 1/25/2014
Formerly Twilightmv
Yea, I'm going through a similar situation. Not looking forward to breaking the news to my folks. Last time I think they had an inkling we were gonna start trying, so when we told them we were preggers they were super excited. My mom is the consumate worrier though and was stressed my whole pregnancy. It didn't help that 4 days after we announced our pregnancy to everyone, we found out it was identical twins and had to reannounce to people who had barely had time to let our initial news sink in. I told my folks over the phone (they live long distance). With the twin news I called my mom while she was at work and she ended up having to take leave the rest of the day and break out the Xanax. So I would say this is one of the reasons I'm nervous to tell my folks. We gave away all of the baby items and clothes the girls used to my brother and his new baby because we weren't planning on having more children. So I have to tell people soon enough that my brother doesn't sell or give away the baby stuff. So that may mean that I'm stuck breaking the news over the phone again. Blah.
I don't know how your folks are, so I would plan your announcement based on how they would take it "best." If you think having your mother's friends around will help boost her excitement, then go for it. Everyone is different. What works for one mom, might not work for another. You know her best. As far as your dad - women's gossip travels fast - so you'd have to let him know pretty quickly right before or right after the meeting.
I think since it's not your first she won't be mad and it might be a cute way to tell her. Maybe make plans to go to your parent's house after the meeting so you & mom can tell dad together.
Of course, my family does not go for big announcements over things like that, so maybe I'm the wrong to ask.
This. My mom would probably be really hurt if I did it this way.
I know my mom would prefer a private announcement - but that's my mom. You obviously know you're mom better than we do so if you think she would be ok with this then go for it.
My biggest concern would be if your mom doesn't react the way you hope she would, that you'll be hurt and either need to hold it in until the meeting is over or you may start crying right there.