Bedsharing issue or 3 moths growth spurt?

jeannkerricotober09 · January 2012

N turned 3 months yesterday (how did THAT happen?!) and we have had some recent sleeping issues. When it comes to him sleeping, I am really laid back, or as laid back as a sleep deprived individual can be, but I am beginning to wonder if I might be doing more harm than good.

We bed share and have since N came home from the hospital. We both love it and until recently, it seemed to be working really well for all of us, but beginning around the holidays, we started having issues and it has me wondering, is bed sharing causing them or is it a really prolonged 3 month growth spurt?

Around 2 months or so (Dec 10th) N started sleeping 6-8 hours, regularly, for his first sleep. He would nurse about 5 min, fall asleep while nursing, and sleep 2-3 hours, nurse and repeat. Easy breezy. And then the holidays happened and his day was thrown off and he was totally overstimulated and his sleeping habits went into the toilet. He started getting up every 45 min- hour. I attributed it to the holidays and his 3 month growth spurt. But it hasn't gone back to how it was, not even close..

the longest stretch of sleep he has now is 4 hours but that is maybe once a week. Typically it is 3 hours and then up every 1-2 hours all night long, sometimes (like last night) he only sleeps for 38 min. Arg. And his daytime naps are terrible. Prior to last week, he would have an hour morning nap, a 3 hour afternoon nap, and 2 45 min-1 hour naps in the late afternoon and early evening. He initially falls asleep nursing or rocking and then I easily put him into his swing where he stays for the remainder of his nap. Now he will only sleep on me. If I move him, I have a 75% chance of waking him up and losing his nap altogether. (he is moaning in his swing, half asleep right now).

He is irritable from lack of sleep and always seems uncomfortable. His back is arched and his legs are always going (though he did grow 2.5 inches in the last 2 weeks so I imagine it is the reason for his discomfort). Also this week he went from 5-6 poops a day to 1 so his digestive system is changing.

Sorry this is so scattered, I am typing as fast as I can to get it all out before he wakes up.

Back to sleeping after he nurses and falls back to sleep, I slide him up to the top/middle of the bed so our covers stay away from him and within moments, he will scooch his way down to my face and press his nose up against mine, which is breathtakingly adorable but not an easy position to sleep in. If I move him, he will push his face against my side, arm, etc. For the last two weeks, he *has* to be pushed up against me when he sleeps. No matter how far across our cal-king bed I slide him, he grunts and rocks his swaddled body across the bed. It is hilarious and makes my heart sing but it also makes me wonder if he would do better in his own bed.

So.. 3 month growth spurt? Can it last 2.5 weeks? Does anyone remember it being this fierce or maybe his problems are being caused by his need to be right next to me and therefore not getting a quality nights sleep? It will absolutely break my heart to move him to the nursery but I miss my happy baby

Oh and we tried him in a co-sleeper and he sleeps worse.

I am leaning towards bedsharing not working but then I think about his bowel movements, irritability, discomfort, terrible naps, growing so much in the last few weeks and I (hope, hope, hope) hope it might be his growth spurt. And the last 2 weeks he nurses like a mad man at night. Even if he has only been asleep for an hour, he will nurse like he hasn't eaten in 5 hours, which is really different than before where he would only nurse 5 min or so.

so thoughts?

lnelson20 · January 2012

Both of our kids had sleep shifts at about 12 weeks or 3 months. They went from basically sleeping through the night to waking up several times a night to eat. For Eli, this is really when and why we pulled him into the bed. Lex was already in the bed at that age. For us, it got better after a few weeks in that they started sleeping sounder between feedings so we could get up, sleep ourselves, etc. but they still don't sleep through the night consistently. I think, at this point, Eli might if he was in his own bed.

Good luck!

2moms2twins · January 2012

His back is arched and his legs are always going from our experience and the wonderful NICU Nurse this is a HUGE indicator of GAS. L ( baby A) has to be burped mid way through feeding and we literally have to pound her and or put pressure on her belly with her standing leaning on our hand ... My mom thinks we are beating the crap out of her Her Burps are EPIC and really she must summons them from the ground cuz the girl sounds like a BAD MEAN NASTY Truck driver with a belly hanging out .... But she is so uncomfortable with out burping .. Now at 6 months its not as bad b ut back arching again from NICU staff is gas ( or so they told us and - our 2 diff friend had nicu babies and their nurse said the same thing) Kicking like river-dancing is ok as long as child temperament is HAPPY if baby is kicking and fussy usually gas...

as for sleeping .... we did baby-wise and asked lot sof people most say a baby that young does not need a schedule and well might be true but we have two so we did Babywise . Its basically every 3 hrs. We started them at 3 months also. Got the book from library read it and then kind of adapted.. now I wonder if our kids sleep too much ... But They are always happy ... so I am not complaining and they sleep through the night ... YAY and thank you universe.

here is our schedule @ 3 mo.....

8am wake up feed 4-5 oz

9am back to sleep till 11am they get 4-5 (as much as they will take in 30 min period) Then awake time from 11:30 -12 this was tummy time or mat time something stimulating but not over the top.

Down at 12 we swaddled and then out till 2 pm repeat get 4-5 (as much as they will take in 30 min period) Then awake time from 2:30 -3 this was tummy time or mat time something stimulating but not over the top.

They were down from 3-5 and then we do the same untill 11pm which was our bed time and then we do a Bigger feeding at 11pm with no awake time ...

As we went on we could see when they were actually tired they now let us know when they are done with "AWAKE time" and now at 6 mo they do sometimes wake up ahead of schedule but they hang out and play in crib

The book suggest that you only let them sleep where their sleeping area is not on you or in a swing we tried but in the begining we caved and just put them in swings or where ever we are back to swinging at 8pm just cuz I am not sure?

so now at 6 months they have the same schedule pretty much they go down at 8pm and we really dont have to wake them at 11 as they are pretty soundly asleep and they would prolly make it all night but we like that time and Melanie is not a EARLY bird so she prefers the late night over waking up ...

Hope that helps ask anything ... now that i think about it i wonder if they sleep too much ? Hmmm there are times when Sloan forgoes the nap and will just lay and play in her crib and that is ok ...

Let me know how the degassing goes we have Lilka and she was a Gas storage bin... Even the Dr would listen to her bowles and say OH MY .... but now she is all good ...

Are you EB or pumping and BF? What Melanie ate really affected Lilka not so much Sloan.

oh and the bed sharing thing scares the _______ outta me... you can also try having Q nap reclined and not flat like in a rock n play or something I HEART RNP's ....

Ok my 2 cents turned in to a buck fifty sorry !

- J

mrl02 · January 2012

Wish I had some advice, but we are sort of wrestling with the same thing. Ben is almost four months old and up until early December was a pretty fantastic sleeper. For several weeks, he would go down about 8, be up at 2 (one night it was even 3) and then down til 6 or 7. But, starting in mid december, it all went to hell in a hand basket. Then, we traveled for Christmas. He was up constantly for several weeks. I couldn't decide if it was growth spurt, if his reflux was getting more severe, if my supply wasn't keeping up, or if the travel had turned a few bad nights into a habit. It's better now, but still not as good as it was. These days, he is generally up about twice a night (maybe 12 and 4). He has also become the king of the half hour nap, even when he clearly needs much more. But, at this moment, he is actually asleep in his crib (which I thought impossible during the day). He's been in there for over an hour and I can't quite believe it.

As I said, wish I had some advice....hopefully someone will! But, even if it isn't great, it has improved after a few weeks. So hang in there. We should really get our boys together sometime - they are just a few weeks apart it seems. We are in Watertown, so not sure if that is anywhere near where you are.

Want a personalized experience?

Bedsharing issue or 3 moths growth spurt?

Re: Bedsharing issue or 3 moths growth spurt?

Choose Another Board

Search Boards