Just had to tattle on another preschool family :(

Mama Jan · January 2012

At drop-off this morning, an older lady (grandma?) pulled into the parking spot next to us with a little boy from C's class (all 3yo class). He was in the back seat with no carseat, no booster.... just sitting in the back. EEK. My heart stopped for a second and I really hate to be a tattle but I knew I HAD to say something.

I emailed the director about it, she wrote back within a couple seconds and said she'd look into it, talk to mom/dad if necessary.

My goodness, we even had a new law that requires kids up to age 8 to be in a booster so there's no way around him not being in any sort of seat.

KathrynMD · January 2012

why didn't you just talk to the other mom/grandma?

Mama Jan · January 2012

KathrynMD:
why didn't you just talk to the other mom/grandma?

Because I don't know the parents and decided it would be better to be anonymous anyway. That way if needed the director could just say "another parent saw..."

I'm not confrontational like that.

Pesky · January 2012

You did what you had to in an unobtrusive way. Good job!

KatFCo · January 2012

It's good you found a way to deal with it. I encountered a similar situation a month ago. At a birthday party, one of the mothers asked me if I could take her daughter home and I said okay, we'd just have to go to her car to get the booster/car seat (both our daughters are 4.5) and she very nonchalantly said she doesn't bother with one sometimes. The other mother in the conversation admitted something similar.

Both mothers have 3 kids, so I can understand their frustration with having to deal with so many booster and car seats, so I just said something about how my mom was always super vigilant about carseats and seat belts and she passed the "obsession" on to me. Fortunately, the mother ended up staying and I didn't have to deal with it because I was NOT allowing that child in my car without a proper seat.

I'd feel so bad if they ever got into an accident when that little girl wasn't properly buckled, but am not sure how I should have handled it. I think you did a good job with it.

Mrs. Rohde · January 2012

I think you did a great job! I would have done the same. I probably would have gone to the grandma directly and just mentioned that there is a law that kids need to be in carseats. I understand not wanting to be confrontational so you did a great job!

byrne15 · January 2012

KathrynMD:
why didn't you just talk to the other mom/grandma?

yeah. i would have just said something to her when i saw it.

ArcticFox · January 2012

I wouldn't have confronted her either, plus then the school can contact the parents. Something definitely should be done, but I don't know that I could do it, plus if it comes from the school, someone who is that clueless might see it as a better form of authority. And you just never know, people can be super offended or retaliate een in the smallest way, so often for me it's not worth the confrontation.

Good for you, hopefully it will be resolved.

franciscaz · January 2012

I'm so glad you mentioned something!

How you feeling??? Ready for Baby #3???

Mama Jan · January 2012

franciscaz:
I'm so glad you mentioned something!
How you feeling??? Ready for Baby #3???

Ugh, I am SO ready. This has been my hardest pregnancy by far. Lots and lots of pain, GD diagnosed at 10wks, insulin since 18wks. I pretty much sleep just 3 hours a night, not consecutive. I'm done. C/s scheduled for Jan 19 but I'm hoping I'll go into labor before that.... like tonight. Wink

Mama Jan · January 2012

Thanks for the feedback everyone, I definitely still feel like it was the right move to email the director (someone I'm friends with and am comfortable talking to as opposed to confronting someone I don't know at all).

I did see her talk to the gma at pick-up and she told me later "mom just forgot to give her the car seat today." I totally don't get that. How do you just forget to send a safety seat with your child? I'll never understand. Hopefully she remembers next time?

KatFCo · January 2012

I have to admit, I once left for a 3-day trip with my daughter's carseat in the back of my car. My husband reminded me several times to move it and I completely forgot (was focused on going to see a friend in labor). Fortunately, he was able to borrow one, but yes, it does happen even with the most conscientious.

rsd12 · January 2012

Mama Jan:
Thanks for the feedback everyone, I definitely still feel like it was the right move to email the director (someone I'm friends with and am comfortable talking to as opposed to confronting someone I don't know at all).
I did see her talk to the gma at pick-up and she told me later "mom just forgot to give her the car seat today." I totally don't get that. How do you just forget to send a safety seat with your child? I'll never understand. Hopefully she remembers next time?

Easily! My husband took my son's car seat with him to work one morning. He commutes 30 minutes away, and that is without traffic. I also did not realize until we were getting in the car. I almost brought my son to preschool 2-3 miles away with him just belted in (but I got lucky and did end up borrowing a carseat from a friend in my neighborhood that worked from home). This has also happened to a few of my friends, especially when you get to the booster stage since my husband will take my older son's with him over the weekend.

Court0026 · January 2012

You did what I would have done too! Something has to be said/done. No seat = no school/driving IMO, but I am kind of a stickler for safety and rules. I wonder about the parents at our preschool, but mostly would like to complain about the dad who drives through at pick up (100 kids leaving school with their parents) on his cell phone (illegal here) and really distracted every day.

AZ123 · January 2012

I think the way you handled it was the best because the Director will see the drop offs more than you will (you're timing was perfect but may not be the same on another day) and so the Director will be checking for non-car seat more frequently and will be able to determine if this is a one time thing.

Good job! You get a gold star safety badge for the day.

dutchgrl678 · January 2012

You did the right thing. If the grandma is someone who regularly drops off the child she should just have her own carseat/booster in the car. Same goes for ppl on here who say DH has the booster seat in his car. Why don't you have one in yours too? It's not like they're that expensive?

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Just had to tattle on another preschool family :(

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