Attachment Parenting

Thoughts on pre-school for a 3 year old? (XP)

I posted this on the pre-school and 24+ board as well, but always love your opinions as well :)  Now, this pre-school post doesn't even get into the idea of what type of school we will be sending LO to, but just in general I am curious about your thoughts of sending LO to a 3 year old pre-school program.

My DD will be 3 in June. We had always intended to send her to a 4 year old preschool program, but our babysitter is strongly recommending we send her to the 3 year old program at the local preschool next year (the babysitters daughter and another one of the kids she watches have been to that school and they love it).

I am looking for feedback on benefits & drawbacks of sending a 3 year old to preschool. My DD is very verbal, and has been for quite a while, which I think is partly because she has always spent time with kids a year or 2 older than her at the babysitters. But next year, she will be the oldest kid at the babysitters, and will only be with little kids, like 1 and (barely) 2 year olds (and hopefully a newborn sibling, if this one sticks!). I think in this situation it would be good to get her out and spending time with kids her age in a somewhat structured learning environment, but am looking for more insight from other parents.

Oh, and she is potty trained, which I know is a factor as well.

Thanks!

 

  
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Re: Thoughts on pre-school for a 3 year old? (XP)

  • I'm a former preschool teacher (2.9-4 yo) and I strongly recommend it for that age!
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  • I highly recommend it.  Some kids that have not had much experience with children their own age, have trouble learning how to play and communicate with them.  I doubt, from the sound of it, that your LO would have that issue, with only a couple yrs age difference in those she interacts with most.  Plus if a child is used to a small, home daycare type setting, they can sometimes feel overwhelmed in a larger, school type setting and this gives them plenty of time to adjust.

    Others do perfectly fine, entering pre-school at the age of 4.  As a previous pre-k teacher, it is beneficial to the child, if they are already very solid in color, number, shape, and alphabet skills, and can write their own name.  In many places, pre-k is very much like the kindergarten of old, and it's helpful if the child doesn't feel left behind or like their classmates are all smarter than they are.  It's suprising, sometimes, just how much that can affect a child.

    Either way, start researching and discussing with your DH about what kind of pre-school/school you want your LO to attend.  That can also effect what age you should start at.

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  • I would think preschool would be more beneficial than being with a 1 and 2 year old (and possibly a newborn) all day.  She would have a better peer group for inspiring pretend play and with learning to share, modeling other behaviours, etc. 

    I would also start to worry that if you leave her in daycare with children that aren't at her age level she may start to act out, especially with a new sibling.  She just may not be fufilled without having children her own age to engage her and that may bring on a host of other issues.

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  • PP have some good thoughts.

    However, I am going to play devil's advocate. Many people tend to mention peer groups. But really, when in life do you experience a peer group (that is, a group of people within a year of your own age) consistently other than in school? Once you are out of school you generally work. And most people work with people of varying ages (at least compared to a school peer group).

    Learning to be around younger people is a valuable skill to have as well. LO could pick up some leadership skills (I use this term loosely as we're talking about kids) if around little kids. The flip side is that this could also happen in pre-school.

    GL making the decision!

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  • DD2 is in daycare, but if she wasn't, I would start preschool at 3 years. DD1 went to public 4K last year at 4 years, and I think her preschool program at her daycare really prepared her for it. Our 4K program is 2.5 hours, 5 days/week. I think something more part time at 3 years would be very beneficial in preparing for 4K for kids who aren't in daycare. Although now I'm starting to talk about preschool preparing kids for preschool... Hmm... I just know that socially, my very shy DD1 really benefited from daycare/preschool, and I think she would have had a very tough transition to 4K without it. (There were 19 or 20 kids in her 4K class; there were 12 in her daycare/preschool class.)
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  • imagebarnwife:
    PP have some good thoughts.

    However, I am going to play devil's advocate. Many people tend to mention peer groups. But really, when in life do you experience a peer group (that is, a group of people within a year of your own age) consistently other than in school? Once you are out of school you generally work. And most people work with people of varying ages (at least compared to a school peer group).

    Learning to be around younger people is a valuable skill to have as well. LO could pick up some leadership skills (I use this term loosely as we're talking about kids) if around little kids. The flip side is that this could also happen in pre-school.

    GL making the decision!

    Except that ages don't matter as much as you get older when it comes to developmental peer groups.  There is a huge difference between a 3 yr old and a 6 yr old.  But the difference between a 30 yr old and a 33 yr old is nowhere near as vast.

     

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  • imageToastieSimons:

    Except that ages don't matter as much as you get older when it comes to developmental peer groups.  There is a huge difference between a 3 yr old and a 6 yr old.  But the difference between a 30 yr old and a 33 yr old is nowhere near as vast.



    Agreed. But does that mean a 2 year old can't learn anything from being around 1 year olds? Or that a 4 year old won't learn from 3 year olds?

    Personally, I think it is important to make sure your children have experiences with a range of ages. Maybe that means the OP sends her LO to preschool at 3 and also does a playgroup with kids of other ages. Maybe that means no preschool until 4 but having more playdates with kids her own age.

    I honestly just wanted to give the OP things to think about.
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  • I think it depends on the kid. If he's bored at home and itching for some peer interaction, then yes. I don't think there is any big benefit if you do or any big detriment if you don't.
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  • My kids are daycare kids since they were babies but since she hit 2.5, preschool has been amazing for Kate. She's thriving in a way she wouldn't be if she was home.
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  • imagerjveldman:
    I think it depends on the kid. If he's bored at home and itching for some peer interaction, then yes. I don't think there is any big benefit if you do or any big detriment if you don't.

    exactly this.  my 3 yr old DD thrives with younger kids and LOVES to take care of them and it has taught her wonderful things, she is very caring and helpful.  she also loves older kids, but i'm just saying that younger doesn't necessarily mean bad.  my great-grandma was the oldest of 12, all she had were younger kids around, she turned out great.  yes i get that older kids can teach them things, but i'm just saying that alone should not be a dealbreaker. 

    mainly, and what others haven't pointed out yet - how stimulated is she at her current daycare?  it doesn't matter if it's technically a preschool as long as she's learning.

  • imageWiggleBaby:

    imagerjveldman:
    I think it depends on the kid. If he's bored at home and itching for some peer interaction, then yes. I don't think there is any big benefit if you do or any big detriment if you don't.

    exactly this.  my 3 yr old DD thrives with younger kids and LOVES to take care of them and it has taught her wonderful things, she is very caring and helpful.  she also loves older kids, but i'm just saying that younger doesn't necessarily mean bad.  my great-grandma was the oldest of 12, all she had were younger kids around, she turned out great.  yes i get that older kids can teach them things, but i'm just saying that alone should not be a dealbreaker. 

    mainly, and what others haven't pointed out yet - how stimulated is she at her current daycare?  it doesn't matter if it's technically a preschool as long as she's learning.

    Thank you all for your feedback. My DD seems quite happy with her babysitter, but I would be happy if it was providing more than just a fun place to play. I don't believe a 3 year old needs to be in a rigorous program, but because she is so verbal, I think she could use a bit more stimulation. It sounds like pre-school will be great for her. The program the babysitter has sent her kids to is a 3 days per week (3 or so hours) program, so if we went that route she would still have plenty of time at the sitters with the younger kids and (hopefully) a baby sister or brother. I think she would love it, and personally couldn't think of any reasons not to, but wanted to hear the opinions of other parents. Thank you!

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  • We're kind of in the same boat. DS is currently at an in-home daycare. There are 2 other boys his age, and 7 month old, and late summer our newborn. He gets plently of interaction with kids his age, but little structure or "education." It's a fun place to play as PP stated. I was thinking about preschool 2 full days/week starting next fall.
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