DH said no to DE...guess no baby :(

Re: DH said no to DE...guess no baby :(

• Llamamama member

  January 2012

  I am so very sorry.... Big hugs to you.
  

  Me: 40 Dh: 41, TTC since August 2009, began Acupuncture and Herbs Sept 2011, began Temping and Charting Nov 2011.

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• fullfhope member

  January 2012

   

   

  Me 37 DH 40 TTC since 1/11 DOR AMH .34 DH S/A Great BFP 12/11! MC 1/12 IUI #1 2/12 BFN. IUI #2 3/12 BFN. IUI #3 4/12 BFN IVF #1 5/12 BFP! DD 2/13/12

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• mslady919 member

  January 2012

  (((((hugs)))) Im sorry things have come to this point.

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• Bubs711

  January 2012

  Oh, Becky!  That is SO unfair!  I wish there were some way I could help you convince him to do this.  I'm sorry you are feeling so sad.  {{{{HUGS}}}}}

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• ForTheLoveOf Pink member

  January 2012

  Becky

  I so understand your pain. Unfortunatley I don't have any words of wisdom or ways to lessen the torture. I also am at the point where acceptance of "the end" is really unfathomable, although it is my reality also. All of the questions are things that I ask myself daily....how will I cope...how will life be life without a child?

  I think I would continue to do ART until it worked....... but I guess the DH has to be the inner voice,( whether it is the voice of reason or not that is debatable).  I wish peace for you and the decisions that have been made...I tell myself that there must be a reason that the universe has chosen this path for many of us.

   

  TTC since 2009 very frustrated 42yr and DH 40
  
  5 cycles of Clomid with satisfactory response=BFN's
  Fibroid removal Nov2010
  IUI Clomid #1 Feb 2011...BFN..damn it!
  IUI Inject's #2 Apr 2011...CANCELLED...low estradiol
  IUI Inject's #3 June 2011...BFN
  IUI Inject's #4 Sept2011...BFFN
  Lap Dec 2011...severe endo..cyst removed..some remains...
  IVF#1 Apr 2012 ....cancelled due to over suppression
  IVF#2 July 2012....6 follies...only 1 retrieved....BFFN
  surgery suggested to move ovary to an better placement but....we moved two time zones away and are financially and emotionally empty
  
  

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• Maybe Joleisa member

  January 2012

  I am so sorry.  I hope DH joins you in counseling, so that you can find peace in the decision together.

  
  
  TTC since 10/2010
  IUIs # 1-5 = BFFN
  IVF # 1(July 2012) = BFN
  IVF # 2 (November 2012) = BFP (MIssed MC D&C @ 8w3d on 1/10/13)

  IVF # 3 (June 2013) = BFN 

  IVF # 4 (September 2013) = BFP Fraternal twin boys! (Loss at 21w6d due to IC on 1/26/14...devastated.)

  3/21/14--TAC (transabdominal cerclage) w/Dr. Davis in NJ

  IVF # 5 (May 2014) = BFN

  FET (August 2014) = BFN
  
  

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• Mrs.McIrish member

  January 2012

  ForTheLoveOf Pink:

  Becky

  I so understand your pain. Unfortunatley I don't have any words of wisdom or ways to lessen the torture. I also am at the point where acceptance of "the end" is really unfathomable, although it is my reality also. All of the questions are things that I ask myself daily....how will I cope...how will life be life without a child?

  I think I would continue to do ART until it worked....... but I guess the DH has to be the inner voice,( whether it is the voice of reason or not that is debatable).  I wish peace for you and the decisions that have been made...I tell myself that there must be a reason that the universe has chosen this path for many of us.

   

  I really can't say anything more beautiful that what Pink has said. I wish you peace in the coming days. It's so unfair the cards that some of us have been dealt. I hope someday we find meaning in all of it.   Big big hugs.

  TTC #1 since 8/1/10; Me:41 and BRCA1+, DH:46
  DOR (FSH 24.3)/ terrible egg quality ; homozygous MTHFR c677t
  5 IUI's: 2/11 to 6/11 and 1/12= BFN
  OE IVF#1-4 8/11-6/12= all BFN
  DE IVF#1 11/12 bad embryos= BFN
  DE IVF #2 2/13 BFP/Beta hell: m/c 5w6d
  CFNBC 7 months, not doing well; decided on guarantee program at RBA w/frozen DE
  DE IVF #3 1/14  ET 4BB; BFP;M/C 5w1d, incomplete m/c; MVA extraction in ER 7w1d

  DE FET#1 ET 3/1714; BFP, beta 1 3/27= 197, beta 2 3/31= 1586, beta 3 4/7= 13879!!
  First u/s= Twins with HBs at 6w2d! We are Team Pink x 2!!
  
  K & K born 11/21/14 at 38wks 4 days
  

  
  

  SAIF/PAIF Welcome

  
  

  http://waitingforraintostop.wordpress.com

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• gundy21 member

  January 2012

  So sorry to hear this.

  

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• winidpu

  January 2012

  I am so very sorry. It has to be super tough to be at odds w/ your DH over this heart breaking decision. My thoughts are w/ you and do hope you can both find peace in this decision. Hang in there.

  TTC #1 since 2/10 Me 38 FSH 12.9 & AMH 0.16 DH 47, low sperm count due to meds. 07/11 We have sperm! 28 million, 70% motility, morphology 1% normal. 08/14/11 1st IUI unmedicated BFN. 09/11/11 2nd IUI w/ Femara + trigger BFN 10/14/11 trigger & Final IUI 10/16/11 BFN 10/21/11 Started acupuncture and loving it! 01/21 ET one embryo 6 cell grade C. Beta 02/02. BFN. Taking a much needed break.

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• emikat member

  January 2012

  Becky, I am so sorry.    I know there are no words to ease your pain right now. Hugs.  We are here for you.  Peace will come.  

  
  
  
  
  
  TTC 10/11. IUI 2/12. BFP 3/8/12. 4/26/12 missed mc. RE consult 5/17/12. IVF #1 ER 7/13/12 53R, 41M ICSIed, 32F, 8 5d, 6 6d blasts - all PGD/frozen. PGD results 1 normal M and 1 normal F, 1 maybe M. FET 9/6, transferred 1 F embie. Beta 9/15 BFN. FET#2 planned for 11/2012 put off until 2013. Surprise BFP 11/21/12!! My son was born on 7/24/13!

  
  

  FET 4/28/2015 - Transferred 1 M embie. 5/6/15 BFP!
  
  

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• happywifemomofone member

  January 2012

  Becky, I am so sorry things have come to this  Angry at YH and we've never even met.  T & P with you.  Ending things is very tough-very hard when you've been surviving from one cycle to the next.  (((hugs))) 

  TTC since 10/09 Me-43 DH-44 RE and testing 10/10-11/10, Recommending IVF 1/11 New RE AMA and DOR-DH low motility IVF #1.1 cancelled 3/11 due to poor response IVF #1.2 May 2011, one perfect 8-cell embryo, 3dt-BFN, IVF #2.1 Converted to IUI d/t poor response. New RE 9/2011. IVF 2.2 completed using HGH,EPP,DHEA, Q-10 and accupuncture. Transferred one 8-cell, grade one embryo on 10/19. BFP 10/31/11 Chemical pregancy on 11/2/11. Started stims for IVF #3, our final try, on 12-2-11. ET on 12/18. Transferred 3 Grade A embryos-BFFN Planning DE IVF, late March/early April- Donors ER expected to be 4/2-4/4. PAIF/SAIF welcome

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• benoitfan member

  January 2012

  Siggy warning- toddler pic

  I am so very sorry.  I can't even imagine how heartbroken you are.  I hope you are able to talk to DH when you see him next and that you are referred to a wonderful counsellor who can help you through this terrible situation. ((HUGS)) to you.

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• lsgabriel member

  January 2012

  Maybe Joleisa:

  I am so sorry.  I hope DH joins you in counseling, so that you can find peace in the decision together.

  This.  I'm really sorry. Is adoption an option?
  

  Us: 39(me)/41(he). TTC since April '11. DOR/MFI. March '12: surgery to remove fibroids, cysts, and endometriosis.
  IVF #1: 9/13/12. ER: 9/25. 3R, 2M, 1F. ET: 9/28 (1-6B). Beta: moved from 10/11 to 10/10: BFN.
  IVF #2: 11/12 cycle postponed due to Sandy and then cancelled due to elevated E2.
  IVF #2.1 cancelled due to cyst.
  IVF #2.2: 2/2/13. Converted to IUI. BFN

  IVF #3.0: 3/2014. BCP & Microdose Lupron.  Cycle cancelled due to poor response.

  IVF #4.0: 2/2015. EPP @ new RE. ER: 3/8. 3R, 3M, 1F. ET: 3/11 (1-8cell). 3/23 Beta: 16.9. 3/25 Beta: 71.6. 3/27 Beta: 300. 3/29 Beta: 800 3/31 Beta: 1816. 4/1 Beta: 4342. m/c at 6w2d. Goodbye little one. I loved you already.
  P/SAIF Welcome.
  My Blog
  

  
  

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• MelleTX member

  January 2012

  I am so sorry that you are going through this. It is so unfair to find yourself at odds with your husband over this. I encourage you to seek counseling together. I have a very good friend who is currently divorcing the love of her life because of a similar issue. I look at her and keep thinking "it didn't have to come to this". They could have grieved together and healed together but they didn't. I hope you and your husband can. Best of luck to you!

  Single Mother by Choice. Life didn't work out the way I planned so I did it on my own. IUI #s 1-3, unmedicated = BFN, IUI #s 4-6, 50mg Clomid, Ovidrel = BFN IVF #1: 23R, 20M, 17F. 5 day transfer 2 blasts. 2 Snowbabies BFP 6dp5dt, Beta #1 7dp5dt = 58, Beta #2 9dp5dt = 114, Beta #3 10dp5dt = 187 1st Ultrasound = 5/3, not much to see yet. 2nd Ultrasound = 5/17, TWINS!!! Hospital Bed Rest at 32 weeks due to pre-ecclampsia and severe edema. Audrey Grace, 5lbs9oz, & Lydia Louise, 6lbs, born via emergency c-section on 12/6/12 at 36w1d My IVF Journey

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• owlprof member

  January 2012

  Oh, Becky, I am so so sorry.  My heart is breaking for you.  I have no words, but I hope that you (and your husband) find peace in counseling. 

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• Country Girl in the City

  January 2012

  I am so sorry.

  BFP on IVF #2 6/29/2012. Beta #1 7/3 = 522; Beta #2 = 1180; Beta #3 = 6491

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• pillowass member

  January 2012

  I'm so sorry - I can't imagine your pain right now. I think counseling will be a great thing for you and I hope that you find some peace together. 

  
  

  
  

  
  TTC #2 since July 2010

  FSH = 11 (20 on day 10 of CCCT)/ AMH = .98 / AFC=12ish

  5 IUI's with oral meds = all BFN
  March 2012 IVF (MDL Protocol) Started stims 3/3; ER 3/11 (9R, 8M, 7F) ET 3/16 (5dt of 2 blasts graded 3AB and 3BA, 3 frosties(!!) Beta 3/26 = 386; Beta 3/28 = 827; u/s 4/11 says TWINS! Boy/Girl Twins delivered at 36 weeks 6 days

  
  

  

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• mtlaurel

  January 2012

  Big hugs, hon. I hope you can reach a resolution for yourself.
  

  TTC #1 since June 2010
  Me: 36, DH: 42
  Dx: DOR and MFI
  
  DH: low count + very low motility; hormones all normal; Sperm DNA Frag. test = poor to fair; male karyotyping normal
  Me: FSH 13.4 + AMH 0.26 + hypothyroidism; Scratch the hypothyrodism (?); Blood clotting and immune panel all negative; endometrial biopsy normal
  
  IVF #1 (MDLF - Jul/Aug 2011): BFN (9R, 5M, 3F with ICSI, 3dt of 1 10-cell grade 2, no frosties)
  IVF #2 (EP-antagonist - Sep/Oct 2011): BFN (6R, 4M, 3F w/ ICSI, 3dt of 1 6-cell, 1 7-cell, grade 4s, no frosties)
  DE IVF #1 (shared cycle - June 2012): c/p (6R, 6F w/ICSI, 3dt 1 8-cell grade A- and 1 7-cell grade A-; no frosties)
  DE IVF #2 (shared cycle with new donor - Nov/Dec/ 2012): - BFP!!!!! 12/14/12. U/S on 12/27 shows twins!!!!!
  
  SAIFW/PAIFW
  

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• brooklynesque member

  January 2012

  I'm very sorry.  I really hope you guys are eventually able to reach a resolution you can both accept. 
  

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• KZ2010

  January 2012

  I'm very sorry.  That is so incredibly difficult.  My DH and I just had "the conversation" two weekends ago and we decided that 2012 is it for us.  If we're not pregnant by 12/2012 we're stopping ART.  We made a pact with each other that we would keep our marriage front and center through what I'm sure is going to be an emotionally charged year.  I hope you and your DH are able to make a similar pact and come together to heal together.  I'm not lecturing, only expressing what has helped me...I keep trying to remember all of the reasons I married DH (the least of which was the quality of his sperm) and everything I love about him.  Hopefully you and your DH will be able to devise a plan that will keep you strong as a couple and figure out how to create a different but equally fulfulling life than what you had originally planned.  ((big higs)) to you!!!

  m/c at 6 wks 2002
  Endometriosis, s/p lap 2009
  Behcet's disease, s/p partial vulvectomy 2010
  Started bromocriptine to lower prolactin level 2010
  Clear HSG 11/2010
  DH morphology = 4, rest of SA looked good 01/2011
  02/2011 First Clomid 50mg cycle
  BFP 03/02/2011
  No heartbeat at 10w5d 04/18/2011; D&C 04/23/2011
  07/2011 Second Clomid 50mg cycle, BFN
  08/2011 Third Clomid 50mg cycle, BFN
  10/2011 First Clomid 100mg cycle with Ovidrel trigger = BFN
  11/2011 Second Clomid 100mg cycle with Ovidrel trigger = BFN
  12/2011 Third Clomid 100mg cycle with Ovidrel trigger = BFFN
  01/2012 Fourth Clomid 100mg cycle with Ovidrel trigger = ?
  

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• BeckyP005 member

  January 2012

  Thank you thank you for all your nice thoughts. Yes I will survive. I feel silly even crying over this when knowing I am healthy,have a home,and family while some have nothing. Only this board could understand and I'm glad I had you ladies. Again I wish you success in having your baby that you all have been dreaming about.

  ME:46 MH:44 DE IVF 2014
  Met with RE 4/11. 2 IUI's BFN. DE best option. Switched clinics to do "shared" program. Had to retake all tests and a mamm that put me behind and then on a DE waiting list for 12 months. Picked a donor!! (10/13/13) Got matched. Estimated transfer in December. After 2.5 years of patiently waiting I will finally cycle....can hardly believe it. DE cycle got cancelled. One of her tests came back positive.  Waiting for another donor. Donor picked!! (1/18/14)

  DE IVF #1 (4/26) BFN  DE FET #1 (6/4) BFP! Beta 1=339 Beta 2=852 Beta 3=9957 EDD 2/22/15!!

  
  

   

   

        
          

  
  

  
  

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