Husband all of a sudden not excited :(

Laura62809 · January 2012

My husband was let go from his job right around Thanksgiving and we have been struggling financially since. He is trying to do what he always dreamed and get his own business (working on cars) up and off the ground. While this is bad timing, some things you can't control and we figured now would be as good a shot as any to try and make it work. We've always "talked" about it but never acted.

Well, now we are really getting into a financial pinch and I unloaded on him yesterday just telling him where we are bill wise if we don't do something in the next month or so (we're not in any sort of trouble... yet... but I don't want to see it get to that point and when I say trouble, I mean tapping into our mortgage reserve for situations just like this, so we DO still have some wiggle room but I don't like losing that stability and then facing the reality that we really could be in real trouble).

So he tells me last night when I'm talking about how excited I am to meet our little girl in such a short amount of time that he really isn't that excited anymore because he's so stressed. It almost made me cry! He's been happy and excited and now it's just kind of gone the other direction!! I hope this changes and it was just a funk he was in.

Sorry, this was just a vent really. Thanks for listening ladies!

SoonToBeMsP · January 2012

Aw, that stinks. I am sure my DH would feel the same way as your DH if we were going through the same thing, but that doesn't make it better I know.

Could you plan a free/really cheap outing together so he can get his mind off everything that is going on?

I'm sorry to hear about him losing his job, also. ::hugs::

gemmalouise85 · January 2012

Sorry to hear he lost his job - It must be really tough for both of you.

As difficult as it is, I wouldnt take to much of what he said to heart. Looking at it from his perspective, he is probably just as excited as he was before however with the change in circumstances, he is now mega worried about taking care of his family too and may be feeling like at the moment, he isnt doing that. It is fantastic that he is using this opportunity to get his business off the ground and fingers crossed that it all works out for you both.

Also, with you being this far along maybe he is keeping feelings and thoughts bottled up because he doesnt want to cause you any more stress or worry? If things are eating away at him, and he is worried about taking care of you guys, last night he prob just blurted the comment out without thinking to much.

I really hope it all works out for you both and I can guarantee, as soon as he has LO in his arms, all the stress he is feeling right now will go out of the window and he will be bursting with pride and excitement!

FarmvilleLover · January 2012

In a situation like this, I don't blame him for feeling so stressed. I think that goes to show that he's a responsible person. I'm sorry you're in this position though and I wish you a lot of luck that your luck changes here quickly. Hang in there hon.

bigbear · January 2012

Oh no I"m really sorry you guys are going through such stress. That is certainly not easy. And I can see why you would be so sad about his comment regarding the arrival of your baby girl. I would be sad, too BUT I really don't think it has anything to do with the baby. It sounds like he just is so stressed and his mind is racing. You'll see, once he sees his little perfection you two have created, everything else will be gone and he will be so happy, excited and in love.

Good luck I hope everything sorts itself out soon.

Kim-n-Eric · January 2012

If it makes you feel better, my husband is super stressed out about baby coming too. I'm sure your husband is still excited but the unknown is often hard for men especially since they often see themselves as needing to take care of their family financially. Don't let it get to you. Once your baby girl gets here, he'll be just as in love and happy as you are about her.

megaloo27 · January 2012

Men want to provide, and he is probably feeling like he isn't doing that. We are missionaries so our income is very sporadic and not at all consistant and I know my husband struggles with that. His stress shows how much he loves this baby because he wants to give it everything it needs. It's hard to be supportive and at the same time realistic of the financial needs. All I can do is pray.

Laura62809 · January 2012

SoonToBeMsP:

Aw, that stinks. I am sure my DH would feel the same way as your DH if we were going through the same thing, but that doesn't make it better I know.

Could you plan a free/really cheap outing together so he can get his mind off everything that is going on?

I'm sorry to hear about him losing his job, also. ::hugs::

Thanks. I really like the idea of a free or cheap outing with each other! That might be just what we need!!!

Laura62809 · January 2012

megaloo27:
Men want to provide, and he is probably feeling like he isn't doing that. We are missionaries so our income is very sporadic and not at all consistant and I know my husband struggles with that. His stress shows how much he loves this baby because he wants to give it everything it needs. It's hard to be supportive and at the same time realistic of the financial needs. All I can do is pray.

I just wanted to say that what you and your husband are doing is great! It inspires me to see people so dedicated into mission work. I hope to be able to one day do so once I get my RN license and help out in that way!

And I also wanted to thank you for reminding me to pray. Sometimes it's easy to forget something so simple.

Laura62809 · January 2012

Thank you everyone for your kind words of encouragement and advice!!! I know that things will get better eventually and I am constantly reminded that things could be 10x worse!!

You ladies are the best and I am thankful we have this board

anhg80 · January 2012

One of my friends just shared with me that her husband told her he wasn't sure he was ready for a baby.... while she was at the hospital in labor.

I haven't seen a more dedicated father. Their son is the light of his life.

I know my husband stresses continually about being able to provide, and he has a full time job with great benefits. I can't imagine what a basket case he would be if he lost his job. I'm sure your husband will still be a great father, and will share in the excitement of the baby coming.

Good luck!

Want a personalized experience?

Husband all of a sudden not excited :(

Re: Husband all of a sudden not excited :(

Choose Another Board

Search Boards