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Multiples
Try to keep twin fact from people?
Did any of you try to keep the fact that you were having twins from people?
After losing our son in June, DH and I are hesitant to share this pregnancy like we did with Anakin. Keeping it from our parents won't be too difficult because we live two states away. We originally wanted to keep the pregnancy completely secret but my mom knows me too well and she'll figure it out eventually, so we thought we'd keep the twins thing from them.
We know, now, that we CAN handle anything, but we wonder if it would be better to share the stress and anxiety with, at least, our parents. Maybe it's our paranoia from our experience, maybe it's superstition, but most likely it's fear. However, now I can't imagine not telling my parents.
Advice? Experiences?
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Re: Try to keep twin fact from people?
The girls were my third pregnancy. My first pregnancy, we told most of our family and friends, and then I miscarried. The second pregnancy we didn't tell anyone other than my parents, and I miscarried again. Both of them were extremely hard, but I found it less hard to tell people I miscarried then to deal with the people closest to me not understanding why I was upset and hurting. I actually told a few close friends about the second miscarriage after the fact. So with the twins we went back to the tell everyone plan. My advice is to tell your parents about the twins. If you tell them that you are pregnant, but not about the twins, and god forbid you lose one, they won't understand why you are upset when you should be happy about the pregnancy. Also, you may want their support if something happens.
First of all, I have no idea how I'd feel in your situation. I can't imagine how painful the loss of Anakin must have been for you guys.
It will probably be hard to keep twins from everyone for the duration of the pregnancy. Maybe you could tell at 24-26 weeks? Eventually, you're going to be really big, and you may be put on bed rest because of the twin/PTL risk (though I never was). You just have to do what's right for your family. If the unthinkable were to happen, would you tell your parents then? If so, you might as well tell them earlier so that they can share in your joy. However, I'm sure everyone can understand why you want to be cautious.
Congratulations, and best wishes for a healthy pregnancy and two healthy babies. I know it must be bittersweet for you guys after losing Anakin.
i'm so sorry for your loss, first of all. i can't imagine how devastating that must be.
as far as this pregnancy goes, i'd tell your parents. it sounds like they'd be a good source of support if something goes wrong.
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i am so sorry to hear about your baby boy.
i have no experience to draw on but i did get what i thought was great advice from my SIL who lost a son. she suggested that we share our news because those around us could start praying for us straight away and also because you never know when you will need support. sometimes you need support without even realizing it but the others around you can see that you need some help.
of course you are the only ones who know what is right for you. many prayers sent your way for a happy and healthy pregnancy. two little ones! so exciting!